1st Time Pain & Bleeding 101

[Bella Donna]

[I]In response, I am in the same boat. Full of answers to many of my questions. I'm the only one out of all of my friends that remained a virgin. I think about it a lot now. I've read up on everything about sex from books to my friends to sites like this one. I really do feel like I know alot. I am very informed, I'm just inexperienced. I know I'd know what i was doing. But then its like there is just sooo much to rmember from other's experiences. where's mine going to fit in? Will it hurt, will I bleed? will it keep hurting? will I keep bleeding? Will i have to resort to a dr b/c of certain complications?? Sometimes I wonder why I even waited this long. It seems I've only gotten more nervous about it as time has passed. I AM ready, yet nervous. Also, before I even think about getting intimate, I want to talk to my doctor about forms and methods of birthcontrol. I think its the right thing to do before my v-card expires. Sex is a huge risk and certain consequences can be avoided. I would just like to know what anyone thinks about this. (comment!) But I guess first-timers can only know when their time comes. I learned alot from this site and from all of the helpful members' advice. Thank you so very much. It great to know that there are ppl out there willing to spend time informing the uninformed. Keep up the good work! Hopefully I'll be giving great advice as well. thanks.

[thetease13]

Everyone is going to be a little nervous their first time. I mean, your first time for anything you're always a bit nervous. It's the same concept.
I went into it knowing it would hurt so I wasn't surprised when it did. I guess in a way, a lot of people should go into it like that so they won't be shocked when it does hurt.
It also took me some time to be able to get him in all the way with no pain. By sometime I mean like over a year... but take in mind we didn't do it frequently like most people do so by the like 4th or 5th attempt of doing it, it went in with no problem and no pain.

Just remember to not go into it like it's gonna be something out of the movies.
The first time is much more awkward than loving for most couples. In a sense it may be magical, but it's probably also not going to be ever so magical.
You may or may not experience pain and you may or may not bleed. I know someone who didn't have any pain nor did she bleed afterwards. I had pain and bleed off an on a little bit for a few days afterwards.
So, it all just varies on the person.

Just perpare yourself. Get some protection and get some lube and make sure he goes slow and if you're in pain, tell him to stop.

[Satans_Intimacy]

Well, as I had thought may have happened, he did dump his "girlfriend". However, the next time I'd gone over there, within 5 minutes he'd gotten arrested again. Heh. Well, once he figures out whether or not he has to go to Juvi or not (if he takes alchohal awareness classes he doesn't...) he says he wants to be with me. I'm nervous, but I do feel I'm ready. Thanks everyone for your advice

This is a litte bit offtopic...but I thought I'd mention it while I was on. I saw him the other day, and he had cuts all over him..up his arms, his back, his stomache...and who knows where else. When I asked him about it he simply said he was mad. I don't want to report this to anyone, because I know he doesn't do it to try and commit suicide...he does it to feel better. I called him later that night to see if he was okay, and he said he was, but what can I do to make sure everything will be alright for him? His parents really don't care.

Alright well thanks again. I'm out. :P

[Kirst]

Last night was my first time having sex. It hurt very bad, so he stopped. I really didn't think i was going to bleed, but about 2min after it was all over the floor and my legs. It was STILL bleeding that night, and just a tiny bit this morning. My 'opening' can only fit my finger, i couldn't even fit 2 fingers in there, and his penis is pretty wide. Is this something i should be worried about? Or should i just wait and see if i keep bleeding for a couple more days. I am deffently going to keep on trying though this site has gave me so much info that before i came on here i was scared to have sex for the first time, but after reading everything i was very relaxed the first time.

[xmakemebreak]

ok so i had sex for the first time the other day and during and afterwards it hurt and i went to the bathroom afterwards and i was bleeding like it wasnt alot like my cherry had been popped but it was just like a cut or something so when i got home i wanted to make sure everything was ok but like i think like some of my skin had been torn on the sides or something and bruised to like its not big but only on one side like inside ...and i dk what it is really like i dk if i should be concerned or let it be and see what happens...please help cause i really have no clue on this?

[omgwtfbbq]

hi
my bf and i did 2nd and 3rd bases for about 6+ months before sex, whenever i would masterbate i could feel what i thought was my 'cherry' cuz thats wat it felt like i guess, the first time it didnt hurt unless he went really deep or hard. there was no blood or anything but now i can still feel the..whatever it is. his junks are pretty big/average so i dont know if he just didnt go deep enough to get to the hyman? Is this normal or is there something else inside me?!

[demonbuttercup]

the hymen isn't far up inside you. Its a piece of skin that partially covers the entrance to your vagina.
If you guys were doing stuff like fingering and if you have used tampons, etc... your hymen was long gone before you had sex.
There is a spongy ball feeling thing on the upper wall of the vagina, a few inches in.. that is normal. Way farther in, could be your cervix.

[krh8286]

Ok first off, I want to make this clear to all the girls out there... PEE AFTER SEX!!! It sounds stupid and it is kinda hard to just get up an leave right after, but you really need to to avoid UTI (urinary track infection) These are horrible! They are caused by bacteria going up your uretha. Makes sense... there is lots of close contact in that area... Also, about the only way you can get one is by having sex... an easy way for you parents to find out, I have a friend that got one and thats how her parents knew she wasnt a virign. My mom had a horrible one right after college and had to go to the ER, so plase do!

Now for losing virginity...
If your prepared, and have been fingered a lot, etc, it wont be as bad. Its normal to bleed to an extent, but not profusly. Dont do anything too rough your first time, take it slow and easy, and i would say Missionary (girl lay down on her back on bottom with her legs spread and guy on top between her) is the best for this. Guy has most control, where is if the girl is on top, and is experienceing pain, its harder to continue. Also, my x, whom was my first (I was 18) didnt want to hurt me, and i was making faces of pain! So maybe cover your face somehow... so he cant see the look of agony! Also, LUBE is wonderful! Put it all over the penis and on the girl and get it over with, just go in quickly, like ripping off a bandaid, the quicker the better. And usually, as you go on, it hurts less, and if you have sex frequently, it will hurt less. Hope this helps some of you!

[EnglishPsycho]

Originally Posted by [b

Quote[/b] (WildF17 @ June 08 2003,19:44)]Thanks a lot for the responses, they were helpful. Have a good Sunday.

me and my girlfriend had the same problem mate. It stopped after a while. We think it was either her "braking in" or mayeb i cut her

Just to ask pple me and my gf have been togetehr 11 months, i am 17 she is 18. We started having sex a month ago (virgins both of us), first time around there was quite a lot of pian for her even though i was extreamly gentle. We've had sex quite a few times since, we always perform a lot of foreplay but it still hurts her when it's going in. Any aidvice guys? Just so u know it usually hurts her for a little bit even if we sit perfectly still. On a few rare ocasions it will hurt even after a while. Any tips guys we're really concerned.

Thanks

[michael.b]

hey me again,i had sex a girl i hooked up with last night,it was good, but i slipped out a few times...is this normal?does this mean im small?she was really wet does that change things?or maybe it was just down to inexperience-my first time.