Are you ok with masturbating!because i had the same problem as you katey until i got over my fear of touching myself.You might like to read tips re female masturbation in index,because i found it really very helpful,and i am having orgasms all the time now both through masturbation and sex

I was the same kate,that is one reason why i held my orgasm back.I learned to relax and accept that receiving pleasure this way is a natural thing.I find that i have little ripples building to larger spasms and waves till i hit the big one.Every woman's orgasm is different,but just try to relax and focus on the pleasure you are getting from and giving your boyfriend and the rest should follow if you let it

[QUOTE=Katewuvsyou;260619][COLOR="blue">hey I just recently lost my virginity this past year, and i became really addicted to sex with my bf, i really like the feeling and i want it all the time, but i am afraid to orgasm.[/COLOR]

What is it about having orgasms that is scary or making you afraid of them? Is there something in particular that has you concerned, or, is it a fear of the unknown?

[COLOR="blue">is there something wrong with me?[/COLOR]

Not necessarily. My guess is that you have questions regarding the "unknown" and fear what you do not know or understand. If this is what is playing out in your mind, please understand that this is OK. What is not alright is to blow your fears way out of proportion.

[COLOR="blue">i dunno what to do[/COLOR]

I suggest two approaches: first, talk to girlfriends with whom you can share confidences and who will not gossip. Ask one or more of your friends what orgasms mean to them; how each person learned to masturbate; how each of them let go of their fears and pushed on to then enjoy an orgasm; and! to describe the various feelings they enjoy.

Second, if you have not yet learned how to masturbate, then throw caution to the wind and learn. Why? Because each of us, male and female, is responsible for our own. We do not give them away, so you cannot expect that your boyfriend/husband will do this for you. All any of us can hope for is to help our partner achieve them, and, to do this, you must know how, then help your partner learn how to mimic your specific technique.

[COLOR="blue">we tried new positions and different ways, and i almost hit that point, i push him off me cuz im afraid of what is gonna happen next.[/COLOR] :o [/QUOTE]

Please answer the questions, above.

Does your logical mind know that orgasms are pleasurable? If so, what is preventing you from exploring the possibilities?

Here is a copy of the benefits for both genders:

BENEFITS OF MASTURBATING FOR BOYS AND FOR GIRLS--

What are the effects of masturbation happening everyday for a few years including cumming?

Isn't cumming the point?

"For both boys and girls, learning to masturbate to climax helps establish the connections between the millions of sensitive nerve endings in the skin and the pleasure center in the brain. It is a natural part of our maturation. Mother Nature gives us the pleasure center in the brain, the nerve endings, and, the autonomic nervous system that transmits the signals back and forth, yet through some twist of evolution the connects are not established. Practice is how this is accomplished. Boys do this rather matter-of-factly right out of puberty while girls often begin later, if at all.

So, the main reason a girl should learn to masturbate is to transmute from a pre-orgasmic entity into an orgasmic being. It is a learned experience. It is also a conscious decision and effort. For boys, learning is pretty much an automatic activity from the beginning, and a driving force often willing us from then on. For girls, while orgasms are enjoyable, they are not the necessity they are for boys.

Other benefits to masturbating to climax are:
a) stress relief
* sexual
* emotional
* physical

b) as an aid to falling asleep

c) relieving menstrual cramps

d) strengthens the body's immune system and helps
build resistance to common infections

e) stimulates the body to release mood elevating endorphins

f) reduces yeast infections

g) strengthens the pelvic muscles

h) masturbation provides an excellent cardiovascular workout!

i) increases sexual self awareness

...and in a follow-up to the original post, noting that masturbation is also "FUN"!

Please read the articles on learning to masturbate, then find a quiet time to practice and practice and practice. I also suggest that you read the articles that discuss the female orgasm. The other articles will add to your general knowledge.

Ya just gotta know that boys do this regularly and frequently--often more than once a day! If the results aren't worth the time and effort, why then do you think we enjoy it so much. For women, learning to climax is more of a concerted effort, yet the results can be just as rewarding. Think about how much more sensitive and responsive a woman's genitals are to being touched and caressed. If it feels so good, why fight the process?

I don't know darl,try putting a pillow over your face it's what i do.I am so loud i could wake the dead.My kids are always complaining that i wake them up with all my moans and 'oh yeah,give it to me baby','take me i'm yours',and ooohs.

;) :D :p :)

> the reason I am rather afraid of it is the fact that, I'm very loud and I dont know how my body is going to react to the fact of achieving that

This brings back memories of a time right after I got out of the service and returned home to a duplex with my wife and her girlfriend/roommate who had not moved out on her own yet. To complicate matters, the master bedrooms for each of the duplex halves were side-by-side, mirror imaged, with crank out windows that opened up toward each other. It was very entertaining to hear what went on next door!

Neither one of was was loud and it was upper most on our agenda to make sure we were quiet for all concerned.

> my boyfriend and I stay in a house with 3 other people and having sex is very difficult as it is cuz we are afraid that someone is gonna hear us or walk in on us. Half the time when we have sex, he is keeping me quiet by kissing me.

If it is still warm outdoors where you live, you might suggest a hike and picnic with your boyfriend, taking along a blanket and a couple of pillows. Set up lunch or dinner off the trail and then feel free to let go and to practice keeping your exclamations in check. DO NOT use one of the pillows over your face. Geez Louise....

Think about going to a motel/hotel and making love there where many often have adjoining doors between any two rooms!

I also remember moving into a brand new apartment with concrete floors and hearing bed springs, muffled moans, and thumps and thuds. It was at this later point that I got the broom out and hit the end of the handle against the ceiling. It is funny to think about it now, not so much, then.

I do not know how to help you because none of the women I've dated over the years was particularly noisy--confining their utterances to whispers, moans and groans.

Is there any way that I can achieve orgasm without screaming?

Are you ever home alone? If so, practice masturbating a few times and work on your "expressiveness".

Try stifling your outbursts and consciously working on grunts.

There should be house rules and one of them is that when the door is closed--KNOCK!

I have the rule that when i am in my room and the door is closed my kids have to knock before they enter.But it very rarely happens,i find that i get very little privacy if any at all.My youngest son & my daughter have barged in on me whilst masturbating,and once while i was having phone sex (mutual masturbation)with a male FWB.My son even barged in during sexual intercourse with my former boyfriend.As for the pillow i hold it in a way that still enables me to breathe,but muffles my noises,allowing me some privacy and decorum

Relax and let go. That's the key.