We're 38 married 13yrs, 4 kids (3-10 years old). We're in love but finding energy and time for sex has been hard. Personally I could have sex a few times a day everyday. My wife's labido isn't the same and I respect that.
We make love 3x maybe 4x a month and its usually missionary, roleplaying dirty talk, little foreplay (don't want to wake kids) maybe maybe doggy style as a treat.
Believe me I have 1,000 ideas though most aren't practical....i want more in our love making...i love seeing her enjoy herself and want to do more but need sexy practical ideas...in the bedroom or another room in the house. I think we can still be "Freaky" but can't seem to find the position or circumstance to let her let loose. We talk so its not lack of communication.
So in love with her and her enjoying herself need ideas. Hate to sound desparate and seeking help from strangers but I beleive i've exhausted every website and porn site (some porn sites twice - joking of course).
Thank you.
Try reading this original post..on body worshiping.
http://www.sexinfo101.com/forum/married_and_long-term_relationships/2272...
And:
http://www.sexinfo101.com/forum/married_and_long-term_relationships/2394...
Mike&Rita - congrats on still seeking to make each other happy - excellent!
Please note that even small changes in your usual methods can have HUGE effects. I'd counsel you two to discuss "what you do if you could?" and think creatively of how you could make that happen with the least amount of fuss - so as to not wake the kids. Perhaps finishing the basement. Installing some bookshelves and a large, padded bench from IKEA,tm, covered with a comfy fabric - aka make it a library (uh-huh, yeah, right) or "home office"? Hey that's my story and I'm sticking with it!
Sera - thank you for the referrals. Greatly appreciated.
My best advice.... hire a babysitter or call your folks for an overnight.
Get a hotel room, and love your wife, unrestrained.
[quote=EvilEvilKitten;201068]Mike&Rita - congrats on still seeking to make each other happy - excellent!
Please note that even small changes in your usual methods can have HUGE effects. I'd counsel you two to discuss "what you do if you could?" and think creatively of how you could make that happen with the least amount of fuss - so as to not wake the kids. Perhaps finishing the basement. Installing some bookshelves and a large, padded bench from IKEA,tm, covered with a comfy fabric - aka make it a library (uh-huh, yeah, right) or "home office"? Hey that's my story and I'm sticking with it!
Sera - thank you for the referrals. Greatly appreciated.[/quote]
Anytime, they are helpful!
TRY STANDING!!
You should get a hotel room... or have them stay over at their grandma's atleast once a month so you could both go completely wild and do everything you've been craving to do.. obviously both of you are with holding a lot of thingy you both want to do to eachother.. just imagine how incredible it'll be
[quote=gorgeous_mistake;201087]TRY STANDING!!
You should get a hotel room... or have them stay over at their grandma's atleast once a month so you could both go completely wild and do everything you've been craving to do.. obviously both of you are with holding a lot of thingy you both want to do to eachother.. just imagine how incredible it'll be[/quote]This is why we have relatives!! The last vacation of my brothers resulted in his son....yeah, see if I keep babysitting the three, LOL! Seriously, draw upon family which you trust and dish the kids off frequently....it gives you time alone and reinforces the need for birth control to those around, plus they are much fun and it gives the kids balance...!!
There is an adage in business that says: "Plan your work and work your plan".
If there are not enough hours in the day, if one or both of you are tired, then you need a better schedule.
* Put the kids to bed a bit early
* Put you two to bed a bit early
* Set the alarm for an hour earlier than usual
One or other of you can be tired, and still have sex. Just make out, cuddle, kiss, and "service" one and or the other without going as far as intercourse.
As for the children, well, this reminds me of a story I once heard in which dad did two things:
T#1: He hid some coins outside and told the kids to go on a coin hunt and not to come in until they found all the money--however much it was. Of course the number he stated was just a bit higher than what was actually out there.
T#2: LOCK THE FRONT DOOR! Tell the kids to play outside and to see a neighbor if there is a problem. Of course, you should talk to the neighbor, first.
Enlisting the help of a babysitter, or for shorter periods of an hour or so, then if relatives are not an option, look to your friends and neighbors.
$1 matinees at the movies on Saturday afternoons.