Hi my sister just called me on the phone she was sat in the toilet, she was in tears her and her husband are trying for a baby she is 20 and married, she has been with her partner for about 4 years now he is 21. so she called in tears saying that she had tried having sex last week with him and he couldnt cum no matter how long they went at it for. And they tried again tonight and he could not keep erect and she thinks its because he does not find her attractive anymore. This has never happened in the years they have been together i have also spoke to him and he said he does not know why it is happening he finds her really attractive but cannot stay hard during sex?
Tue, 12/13/2011 - 00:16
#1
Need help urgent!
> ...she thinks its because he does not find her attractive anymore.
How convenient. How we all hitch a ride to the least likely of circumstances. Why is it that nobody asking about this ever considers technique or change of technique, method or a change in methodology?
I encourage you to recommend that the two of them read every article listed in the Index found at the top of the main screen. EEK's how-to articles are listed as are mine, Brandye's and dlb's.
Have you or your sister asked the man if he can still masturbate as usual?
Have you or your sister asked if he continues to have spontaneous erections?
If he does not have a problem with either of the above, then does he have emotional issues that are bothering him?
How much time do the two of them devote to fooling around and making out?
Does he become erect as a result of thinking about making out, during the process, and/or during foreplay? If so, then the couple should examine what they are doing, or not doing and change the process. Can you ask and supply answers to these questions so that those choosing to reply can better zero in on the matter?
> he could not keep erect
Erections come and erections go. That a man becomes flaccid does not mean that sex is over. It simply means that one or both of them should concentrate on rebuilding his erection by fooling around some more! (What fun!) Have they tried this, or just shut the process down after he becomes soft? A woman should periodically and regularly tweak his erection to keep it "in prime condition" so to speak. If one or both are ignoring this important bit of arousal, then this could be a major reason for his loosing "it".
Without knowing more and until we do, I'm willing to bet that the trouble is because of a change in what they are doing, perhaps as a result of experimentation, and a lack of knowledge regarding human sexual response and behavior. If true, this is one reason why I recommend that they read each of the articles listed in the Index.
Please give us more to work on, or, have him write us on this thread.
-doc
YEGODS! These two are STRESSING OUT trying to have a baby and that will STOP everything from happening. Their emotional states have affected their bodies which have gone into a kind of 'hibernation' waiting to see exactly what the 'threat' is so the body can prepare to meet the threat. Erections, etc, will disappear under these circumstances and it can even stop ovulation if the stress gets bad enough. They have also turned sex from being a joy into being a job.
So, they have to STOP TRYING.
Take break. Relax. Enjoy eachother's company doing something else. They have time. She's 20 so she has a good 15 to 20 yrs left to have babies. The sex will return when the stress has gone out of their situation and they stop treating it as a job.