You two are NOT USING PROTECTION?!?!?!?!?

ARE YOU INSANE???

Oh, I see. "I'm just a virgin here; a guy who's trying to please her by rolling over and playing Russian Roulette with the rest of my life and even though she's waay more experienced than I am, I am relying upon her judgment to keep me safe from everything from gential warts to HIV/AIDS by not wearing a condom". Just a lamb being led to slaughter.

Well, you've certainly "differentiated yourself from every other guy she's tossed away by adding "value" to the relationship. Negative value.

Yes, I do mean to be precisely this hard on you. You're indulging in adult fun WITHOUT being adult about it. You're just being some stupid kid who can't drive attempting to control a Veyron at top speed whilst he's drunk. JUST PLAIN STUPID. It is your penis and you will do with it what you will, but you're NOT supposed to THINK with it.

Find, read and then do what's in the following sticky posts:

The Program

Body Worship - How-to

The Four Hotspots

Stop playing rough ALL of the time - because it gets boring. This includes slamming away internally, choking her, spanking, messing with her ass, and pulling her hair. All too often women just "go-along" or stick with what other guys have taught them - but that does not mean you have to do the "same old, same old" like every other guy she's tossed out before you came along.

Differentiate yourself from all those others by adding greater value (pleasure) to sex with you.

For example: From Behind (the technical term for 'doggy') is an excellent position to caress her posterior fornix. Condom, lube, wriggle in and then SMOOTHLY begin a nice sliding stroke whilst thinking "upward". Add a bit of torque by moving forward from one hip and alternate hips back and forth as you slither in and almost but not quite out.

Learning how to 'know' where you are when inside of her in relation to her is one of the best skills a man can have but you cannot learn it whilst banging away thinking that fast and furious is what's going to work. Sure its fun but NOT as a steady diet.

My daughter's husband ran off leaving her with two small granddaughters and nothing else. Fortunately, she comes from a long line of people who do NOT shirk their responsibilities. She is now returning to college to complete her CPA and the girls are in a safe, loving home filled with light and laughter rather than drugs, alcoholism and rampant violence. (You do NOT want to know.) She gave him his chance - and although he did marry her - HE could not 'grow-up' or 'man-up'. They will shortly be divorced. We will do much better without him.

Are YOU an overgrown child or are you a man?

This has been discussed a lot. Your bet is not likely particularly this early into her learning about her body.

Well I have got to agree with EEK here and the others as well.I stupidly got pregnant after only a few months dating my boyfriend.I also hated using condoms,they just didn't feel right,and although my bf pulled out I still got pregnant.

We got married because I didn't agree with abortion at the time,and he stepped up to the plate and accepted his responsibilities.We met and were married within the year,and our twins were born only 3 weeks after our marriage (6 weeks premature).He turned out to be very immature,and is now my ex husband.We had two more children,one of which was aborted at 20 weeks gestation due to a very severe genetic abnormality that did not sustain life.My son suffered from neural tube defect and my husband blamed me for it's occurrence.Thankfully our youngest son turned out ok,although I had to undergo numerous tests and it was a very anxious first few months of pregnancy.

The cry that you hate condoms is the mark of a CHILD NOT a WOMAN and is therefore someone you should leave alone. "Throw her back until she's full grown". Emotional maturity, a stable personality and a firm grasp on reality without losing the joy of being alive - those are the qualities that matter - being a sex feind during her teens and 20's - ok- but, hell, anything female can do that - only humans can do the rest.

This gf of yours hasn't got the brain of a maggot - and is THAT what you want as the mother of your children??? Yeah- its all fun and games until the kids have an IQ so low that it would embarass a fungus.

There's enough stupidity in the world, buddy, so stop adding yours.

when she says she feels like she is about to pee I bet she might squirt.

[quote=] Please read the very first article listed in the Index.

[COLOR="blue">so since its for pleasing her, she loves it when i thrust hard and fast, in any position, esp with her riding me when i thrust her super fast she loves it.. but i can't seem to handle.. i cum way too fast.. which is why she probably loves fingers.. but i really want too.. so is there a way i can? [/COLOR]

Please continue to read and discuss the articles.

There are articles that discuss ways to delay or retard your level of arousal so that you can gain control over your orgasms. There is an exercise the two of you can work on that is both educational and fun.

There are benefits to beginning intercourse when you are right at the brink of losing control; there are benefits to beginning intercourse when you have a ways to go before reaching the point of no return. Learn how to accomplish the latter using the methods and techniques discussed.

[COLOR="blue">also i did try to stimulate her gspot by fingers with the come here motion, but she said it tickles, feels like she has to pee, or just feels weird.. and now shes kind of pissy and says i need to stop "scooping her"[/COLOR]

Here, again, you need more information.
Here, again, she needs more information.
Here, again, welcome to the SI101 Board and its Forums. Enjoy learning.

First, she needs to learn how to masturbate and to then be able to climax regularly and consistently on her own. Learning how is covered in yet another article. Once she acquires the technique she can show you and also move your hand in the manner she needs at any given moment. Feedback {verbal and non-verbal) is a requirement.

Experiencing the sensation of having to pee when nearing an orgasm is a false signal. If she has emptied her bladder prior to the two of you making love, she has the proof. Simply push right thru the sensation and the orgasm will be waiting for her on the other side. Expect in the beginning that fingering the G-spot will like fingering the Prostate, will only augment and help trigger an orgasm that you are working on with her clitoris.

[COLOR="blue">so by all means our sex is a bit routine.. id like to mix it up but its very hard seeing how both of us don't have our own place..[/COLOR]

Be inventive, be imaginative. Although half the world is approaching the winter season when it will be cold, you can still find spots adjacent to a hiking trail, off a country road, a lone spot in a park, cheap motel room.

"Variety is the spice of life." Do not let your lovemaking become routine. Explore using different positions. Mix up the order you do this, that, and the other caress.
[COLOR="blue">
or get to sex alot.. idk why my stamina is barely increasing... [/COLOR]

Please clarify what you mean by "my stamina".

[COLOR="blue">the most orgasm's ive gave her is around 3.. but all clitoral [/COLOR]

CORRECTION: the most orgasm's I've helped her enjoy is around 3. Keep in mind, she is in charge of her orgasms. You are in charge of yours.

That her orgasms have all been via her clitoris is just fine. If in the future and having gained much more experience, and, knowledge of self, she may or may not be able to have orgasms from other trigger points. Don't worry about any of this right now. You two have much practicing to do in areas much more important. As she learns more about her body and its responses she may be able to have orgasms triggered in other ways, yet as I mentioned at the top, a woman's orgasms are tricky and problematical, so don't be over critical of her, them, or yourself. Women can derive great joy and much pleasure from making love in which orgasms are not part of the equation. Making love has more to do with the emotional and psychological aspects of human interaction than the physical. Making love is the outward expression of the love we have for one another.

[COLOR="blue">we tried snm but she likes to be in control alot.. [/COLOR]

Share and share alike. Variety is spice.

[COLOR="blue">and idk sometimes she goes way too rough on me, and doesn't like me biting her or anything although she loves the feeling of getting "dominated"[/COLOR]

If she is too rough, show her how not to be. A lot of women, experienced or not, tend to stroke a penis much too roughly with jerky transitions at each end of the stroke. Take her hand and guide her, giving her feedback. If she is rough in other ways, again, talk to her, give feedback, show.

[COLOR="blue">i think i almost gave her a gspot orgasm once... but it was after like 2 clit orgasms, and i went rough on her, then i was using the come hither motion, but she seems to have gotten feverish and ended up going to sleep :S[/COLOR]

The two of you need to learn to work together in partnership.

[COLOR="blue">so any tips would be great.. from a guy trying to please an experienced girl and make her orgasm many more :P[/COLOR]

Asked and answered. Read this, again, and, have her read this. After the two of you have read all of the articles in the Index, go back and reread them.

[COLOR="blue">~ edit~ also.. how the hell do i "grind" on her.. really only thing i can seem to do is in and out, or like her on top, and i lift my butt up and in and out.. i want to learn how to do all these circles and stuff.. i know grinding shell probably orgasm clitorically at least..[/COLOR]

Let her grind on you using the Woman Superior/Cowgirl position while resting on your pubic mound.

[COLOR="blue">~last edit~ oh one last edit, sometimes her vagina discharges this white gooey stuff similar to semen, sometimes gets all over my bedsheets (usually during intercourse) (or right after as i go oral on her if i cum too early so she orgasms) she says she only feels it sometimes.. and i eat it.. i don't why it tastes like her vagina.. so i don't really mind.. but what is this substance anyways? is it her cum? she says shes not a squirter but she said she never orgasmed full bodily or with her being on bottom so i wouldn't know..[/COLOR][/quote]

Vaginal mucous.

After reading all of the articles, this post, again, and doing some practicing together, and her alone learning to masturbate, feel free to ask questions. I hope this is of help.

-doc

Welcome to the SI101 Board and its Forums. I hope you will enjoy participating. Please begin by familiarizing yourself with the Index found at the top of the main screen. The Index contains links to helpful informative insightful, as well as how-to articles that discuss the most common questions and concerns people ask about. I recommend that the two of you read every article, discuss what you have gleaned from each, then add the information to what each of you already knows. Knowledge is empowering!

[QUOTE=funkgab;275192][COLOR="blue">So.. i've been having sex with this girl for about a year.. she is quite sexually experienced.. as in her # is CONFIDENTIAL.. but i know its pretty high.. because i know a couple of her fellas... well kinda.. long story.. anyways shes pretty experienced..[/COLOR]

Here are two articles that discusses "experience".

HELP! S/He is more EXPERIENCED! To which I say:

If you are a guy who happens to be shy or uncertain about making the first move, know that this is OK. My suggestion is:
Next: If you are new & have no experience (Pt. 2 of HELP! S/He is more EXPERIENCED!:

[COLOR="blue">she doesn't really masturbate.. i mean she says she doesn't..[/COLOR]

This is another topic that is discussed in one or more articles listed in the Index. Boys learn to masturbate right out of puberty, not so most girls. Most girls learn much later if at all and then it requires a conscious and concerted effort. Each of us, male and female, is responsible for our own orgasms; all any of us can hope to accomplish is to help our partner achieve them and the way to do this is also covered in an article.

[COLOR="blue">i was a virgin before her... [/COLOR]

Please clarify what you mean.
[COLOR="blue">
but she claims that i'm the first person who made her get an orgasm with just oral stimulation.. [/COLOR]

Good for you! Have you been able to duplicate your efforts since?

[COLOR="blue">those days seem to be over.. although i can if i try but it takes a long long time.. i went oral on her for almost over 2 hours to do it with just tongue [/COLOR]

I'm surprised she tolerated this for that long. We have received feedback in the past that suggests that if the clitoris and environs are caressed by fingers, tongue, and/or penis for longer than about ten minutes they become [COLOR="red">SORE[/COLOR], bored, and, tired!

Making love is not what we do to each other; rather, what we do with and for each other in partnership. The two of you need to work together and learning how to stimulate each other is yet another topic with an article attached.

now i need to always finger her while licking and sucking on her clit.. (although she seems to enjoy it more so i dont mind) (but sometimes it is tiring)

See above. Variety is spice. If she can reach an orgasm by licking, alone, great; if she requires additional forms of stimulation--great. Help each other out by providing feedback {verbal and/or non-verbal) on what each of you needs now/next.
[COLOR="blue">
she seems to loveeeee and i mean love getting fingered by me because i can go fast and rough.. (although my hands get soreish) and its not that fun honestly.. but i think im too routine..[/COLOR]

Rough can be a good thing once in a while, however, rough sex is generally not all that pleasurable. Communicate and work together.

[COLOR="blue">anal play is a big nono for her because shes tried it and she said it hurt.. she let me put a finger but she says even that hurt her so i don't really mind...[/COLOR]

Rimming, fingering, dildos, intercourse, prostate massage are not to everybody's liking and if so, not all the time. Once, again, please read the how-to article that outlines the proper way to go about this.
[COLOR="blue">
i love it when she "sits on my face" but she says "its too sensitive" and cums too fast [/COLOR]

There is an easy fix--WAIT until she is ready for a climax and then get into position. In other words, do not begin this position until nearing your respective peaks.

and its kind of awkward cause shes always staring at a wall or a door or something (whatever i don't really mind cause either way i love doing oral on her)

Wait and do this when the room is dark, or if possible, the blind is not pulled. If you have a floor standing mirror, reposition it so she can view the two of you from her "perch". Use some imagination and creative thinking.

she had an orgasm once, riding me.. and she went quite fast.. but that was about it..

[COLOR="blue">she said no male has ever gave her an orgasm with her on bottom.. and i can kind of see why (shes very very tight) [she tells me she kegals] so that is probably why.. [/COLOR]

Very few positions place a woman's pieces parts in close constant contact with a man's pubic mound; therefore, usually more than one form of stimulation is required. What a wise, caring, skilled, lover will do is to reach around and finger his partner's clitoris while stroking.

[COLOR="blue">she says MORE foreplay.. but i really don't know how.. but im starting to learn.. although she seems to be very wet with even the slightest touch..[/COLOR]

Making out does seem to be becoming a lost art, yet what is even worse is that the past couple of generations of boys and girls, men and women, do not understand the importance of and necessity for making out. In a nutshell: fooling around, making out, cuddling, kissing, hugging, caressing and building each others level of arousal and excitement are requirements for turning one another on. The big fallacy in male thinking is that if they can be UP and ready for an orgasm in a matter of moments, so too must women. Not so. The genders are "wired" differently. Women require much more time to get their "engine" reved up, so to speak. PLEASE READ THE ARTICLES LISTED UNDER THIS SUBHEADING:
A COUPLES GUIDE TO MAKING OUT

Next: practice, practice, practice.

[COLOR="blue">most of the time.. she wants me on top for some reason, and we end up doing the position where her legs are in the air, or im between her and thrusting.. or her lying face down and me entering from behind..
but we switch positions here and there.. (and i usually choke her)[/COLOR]

Well... choking is not good. I suggest figuring out why this is happening and fix it.

Please consult the man illustrated animated sexual positions we offer. Click on the site's Home Page, then, again, on the appropriate section. Look at the selections together, discuss them, and try those that interest you.

[COLOR="blue">her favorite favorite postion is doggy... in general, as in being on all 4's and me sometimes pulling her hair (although she doesn't seem to like it anymore that much)[/COLOR]

Were you to ask me and had I to offer a guess, it would be that she never did like having her hair pulled, yet let you do so initially both for the sake of experimentation and to please you.

Doggy is a major position in which reaching around and fingering her clitoris and labia is recommended.
[COLOR="blue">
now a problem is doggy seems to feel awkward for me at times, like its hard for me to get in.. and im super sensitive when i do.. so idk im like awkwardly doing her.. its kind of hard i like go up and down or something? how am i supposed to do it (it feels like im gonna come out alot)[/COLOR]

Look at the variations and try one or more. If you normally approach her from a kneeling position behind her, try standing on the floor. If she is resting on her hands, try having her rest on her forearms and perhaps leaning forward away from you a bit.

As an alternate for gaining entry, have her assist. She knows where both P & V are and can deftly bring the two together.
[COLOR="blue">
i heard from a bunch of girls that they hate it when guys pull out over and over.. is this true? [/COLOR]

More so when they are at the brink of an orgasm than at the start of intercourse. Orgasms are trickier and more problematic for women, so any interruption often sets them back to Square One.

Consciously pulling out is OK if you plan this. "Falling out", so to speak is poor form. As a guy you should always keep one part of your brain aware of where your penis is at all times with regard to the inside of her vagina, as well as being aware of other aspects of the lovemaking process.

[COLOR="blue">my member isn't that big.. im pretty small actually.. she told me im the smallest she had.. but she said for some weird reason im pretty thick and it doesn't feel small at all most of the time, and theres been times when i hit her cervix.. but luckily for me she is a tiny girl [/COLOR][/QUOTE]

> yes we don't use ANY protection..

Answered!

> i'm against it but basically i guess i am being childish in regards because i still have sex with her.. she hates condoms with a passion, and doesn't like to have sex with them.. shes tried the pill, but she would miss it alot, and she claims her body doesn't react well to it.. nausea, wide hips, etc..

Does your girlfriend know that there are many different forms of the pill? If one is not working try another.

Does your girlfriend know that there are many different forms of birth control?
* Pill(s)
* IUD
* Diaphragm
* Sponge

The last two are very reliable

Apparently, you did not extrapolate my statement about using at least two forms of protection. If no condom, then a spermicide and diaphragm. Now, having said this, what is her argument going to be, now?

> i would just leave her.. but i can't seem to :/

This speaks volumes.....
BTW, have you read what I have had to say about what the purpose and benefits to dating are?

> if i do find a new girl i guess i will have to do without protection unfortunately

Asked and answered.

> and yes i know what pregnancy is, and the risks.. what i don't get is her..

Interesting observation. We get her, what we don't get is you.

If she refuses any and all birth control options, then I strongly recommend that you immediately learn Natural Family Planning and the Rhythm Method and know exactly when her fertile days are.

Just move on already.

Your original post led me to guess you were playing games. The statement that you are not using protection causes the same reaction as with Evil.

The gooey stuff? Smegma. Look it up and ..... enjoy.

EEK has used the following two adjectives: Insane, Stupid. I will add "irresponsible".

Why do you suppose contraceptives were developed? From your actions I'm guessing the two of you are of the opinion "not for me". Yet here the two of you are trying to fool Mother Nature. Statistically, "your number is about to come up" and she will rise up and smite thee when you least expect it and are the least prepared. This is not a question of "IF", rather one of "WHEN", your girlfriend will become pregnant. You've been lucky so far, it is time to stop tempting fate.

If you are not prepared to be a father and provide for a child, and to have the future course of your life forever changed, then you must look out for and protect A#1--you.

If your girlfriend is not prepared to be an unwed mother and to have the future course of her life forever altered, then she must look out for and protect A#!--her.

Never rely upon your partner to protect you. Inadvertent mistakes can and do happen!

We recommend three forms of contraception be used: Hers/mine/ours

At the very least two: a condom + a spermicide
Both are easily purchased at a pharmacy or supermarket drug department!

EEK spoke about playing Russian Roulette, I have spoken to girls about considering a penis to be a fully loaded single barrel cannon with a hair-trigger aimed at their vulva. Semen running down the outside of her body can and will find its way inside, of this you can be certain. Insertion is not a prerequisite for a pregnancy to occur.

EEK spoke about playing adult games without being adult concerning the responsibilities that go along with.... Regardless of age, it is a "man" who steps up and takes responsibility and behaves in a responsible manner. So, man UP! before it is too late.

> So.. i've been having sex with this girl for about a year..

So.. during this past year have you thought about what you will do after informing you of her pregnancy? Will she keep the child? Let the infant be placed for adoption?

If she decides to be a mother, are you prepared to participate or be an absentee father? Will you baby sit, change diapers, purchase diapers, food, clothing, toys, stroller, car seat, etc., et cetera, etc.? Do you have plans for insurance? Do you have plans to set aside funds each month for your child's college education? Will you marry your girlfriend? Will you run away from home and responsibilities?

BIG question: Who is going to raise this child? If you expect one or both parents to step up and help, think again. This is your child, your responsibility. They have already done their raising. Of course, baby sitting is a different matter, just do not expect them to step up and take over where the two of you left off.

It is important for the two of you to know and understand that the younger a girl is the more apt she is to becoming pregnant. This is all the more reason to wear a condom, use a spermicide, and, for her to use some form of highly reliable form of contraception of which there are several to select from.

It is a man's task to look out for and protect his girlfriend, significant other, fiancee, wife. Begin taking responsibility now before it is too late. Until you do, you are foolish to believe that you are all grown up and mature. Being grown up and mature is not a benchmark of age, it is a state of mind and behavior.

-doc

P.S. If it is your desire to become a world-class lover, then the two of you need to be reading the articles listed in the Index for starters.

You need to be really careful.

Frankly, she sounds like trouble.

There is NO reason not to use contraception unless you are trying to have a baby.

Which means that she WILL GET PREGNANT.

So having sex with this girl means that you MUST be prepared and able to provide for a child. You are going to have a child with her if you carry on as you are.

Unless you are ready to be a father, refuse to have sex without contraception.

And STOP letting her manipulate you with this stupid "wah wah I hate condoms" crap.

Maybe? Might? Hey, those are slender words to hang a future, your future, on. You have gotten enamoured with an immature female of no character or brain - so what did you expect?

Move on already!

Why don't you see other women?I mean she's not your girlfriend officially right.And if she isn't interested in using protection she really isn't worth the risk of getting serious STD's or AIDS.If she isn't safe with you she wouldn't be with the other guys she is screwing around with.Sorry to say that she does sound like a bit of a "good time girl",and if she really cared for you she would respect your wishes to use protection.

There are plenty of other women out there wanting a decent man to please them,and if you really want to make your woman happy find one who respects herself and you,because this one you keep rambling about certainly doesn't do either in my opinion.

As to your question of does it feel better on the edge of the bed in doggy or missionary.It depends on the individual and how deep you thrust in the woman.I have tried both with my partner.I just got a new bed high enough to try lying on the edge of the bed while he does me standing up.There was no earth shattering orgasm for me,but it was nice to try something different and he did make me cum as he usually does.Experiment and find something that you both like.

But I do highly recommend finding someone who is also willing to please you as well,and one who is responsible and not willing to play "Russian Roulette" with both of your lives.

Nothing to be confused about, firmus. Just a bunch of childish crap and if he can keep it up in the face of above confrontations, denial is his long suit.

Hi,

Ok, I'm lost I guess on this thread. There's this thin veil of "what can I do to please her?" in your posts, but the surrounding statements sound like a daytime talk show episode.

I read that she withheld sex because you brought up protection. How you look to her as a girlfriend while she's having sex with random people that she knows hurts your feelings. And then random scary statements how she's given you STDs even though "right now" she's not sleeping with other people.

I'm confused, because I'm wondering what is it that she's bringing to the table in this relationship that warrants going through all that, and all the other stuff I didn't sum up? I mean, it's not like if you make her come hard enough she'll change her ways and be your perfect girlfriend/wife/mother till death do you part.

I'm in no way trying to put her or you down or anything, as I don't know either of you, but I mean sex is sex, and you could be having just as much sexual fun with someone that's not dangerous. There's nothing magic in her vagina that any other one can't do. The only difference is I believe you're scared to give up the convenience of her easy access as opposed to having to find a new person.

Take care...