My wife and I have been married 12 years now and we just had our third son in June. Since his arrival life has been a roller coaster ride of medical problems surgeries etc... Long story short My wife and I have had very little time for each other and I want to change that. Having said that I am planning on kidnapping my wife for a night away I want to provide her with the most romantic night she has had in a long time. A friend of mine is letting me use their cabin and I was thinking a candle light dinner with soft music, her favorite flowers and a full body massage later on that night. As you can see its a start but I was hoping to get some other ideas for some activities for the night. So my question to you is what sort of activities do you find romantic?
Thanks in advance for any ideas.
I think you have a wonderful idea in mind. That said, depending upon your idea of the activities during your night away, it might be too soon. It takes quite a while before a mother's body settles down and the hormones return to normal.
Are you going to have the grandparents baby sit that night? If not the person should be another relative or very trusted friend. You may in fact be kidnapping her if she is not emotionally ready to separate from your baby.
I'm certainly in favor of giving yourself a night together without children and commotion; however, it might just be a month or so premature. Better me thinks for the time being to take over child care and let her have an hour or two to her self in the bath, or a walk, etc. Perhaps the two of you can go to dinner while your children are under someone's care.
Is your wife home all day or does she work? If she is home all day, be sure to pitch in when you get home and give her a few hours to herself. Take care of the children and baby, cook, clean house, do laundry, etc., and let her have some me time each day.
Spend time after the children are in bed kissing and cuddling, or taking a bath together. Once she is back to normal then think about the cabin.
Thanks for the reply dancingdoc2. In response to your questions yes I am going to have the grandparents watch the boys. My wife does work 3 hours a day. I do help her with the kids and cooking etc... My intent for this trip is to get her away from the stress and try to help her unwind and relax she has been wound up tighter than a clock spring. I am not doing this to get laid. I am doing it to remind her that she is the most important part of my life, I love her and would do anything for her. She has put the needs of every one else before her own and I feel she needs to be pampered,
As JFK once remarked: "Proceed with all possible 'vigah'!"
In addition to taking her away for the night, please consider giving her some at home "me time" such as a relaxing soak in the tub, letting her walk around the block, reading a book, etc., et cetera, etc.
Did anybody ever tell you you're a nice guy?
Geez it's been a long time since I've been on here.
I agree with DD2 that this is an incredibly cool gesture of you. Also though, do be aware that it might be a little difficult for her to mentally "leave the kids at home", if you follow me. Be patient with that so she doesn't feel she's also ruining anything for the two of you that night.
One thing that would get me: you mentioned soft music--sweep her into a slow dance at some point.
I love this idea, and I think all couples should make an effort to spend a weekend with no worries or responsibilities. Just the two of you makes it a great opportunity to make up for lost time. Spoil her with a massage, make her dinner, and just generally make the weekend about her. you know your wife best, do things you know she loves and appreciates. That will make for definite success.
For some sexy tips, check out the 'pleasing her' section of the forum if you haven't already. Here is a link: http://www.sexinfo101.com/forum/pleasing-her/
But I must add, having been married for 12 years you may not need to read up on how to please her. But you may find something new to try ;)
Romantic, hmmmm, Romantic.....I'll have to think about this because, as you might be aware, romantic is not something I generally do.
Sipping something intoxicating while sitting side-by-side relaxing on the back deck watching the summer sun set while listening to Janis singing "Summertime".
I think that's romantic.
As for what to do after the body massage - please see the sticky post entitled The Program.
First let me say thanks to those of you who have responded... I do appreciate it.
I guess I need to clarify what I am looking for..... I am trying to find ideas to take up some of the time between dinner and the massage. I like the dancing Idea or going on a walk, or watching the sun set.
My goal for the night is to pamper her and help her to relax if she feels up to more intimate activities after that great but as I mentioned in an earlier post I am not doing this with the intention of getting laid. She had a C-section and the incision ripped open I had to pack the wound multiple times a day for over a month allowing it to heal from the inside out. She is still tender and finds certain movements and activities cause discomfort. With every thing that has happened she has been extremely stressed, I just want to get her away let her relax and unwind. I guess what I should be asking for is relaxing ideas rather than romantic ideas. I hope this makes sense
A year ago May we were in Honolulu and one of our evenings was spent at the beach on the windward side of the isle. We brought along a picnic dinner and set up on one of several picnic tables. We enjoyed the sunset and watched a couple of fishermen angling from the shore.
We talked about this and that and nothing particularly important. We kissed and caressed but went no further since it was a public beach with a few other people around. We had a great time just being into each other. Hint, hint.
> I guess what I should be asking for is relaxing ideas rather than romantic ideas. I hope this makes sense
Check your local library for books on meditation and stress reducing exercises.
Relaxing ideas?
Isn't watching the sun set relaxing?
Okay then how about a hot tub? Lounging on a floating raft in the pool?
Cuddling up on the sofa before a roaring fire not doing much of anything?
For most women, just the knowledge that she doesn't have to leap up and wash the dinner dishes would be relaxing.
Think back to when you were dating and/or married before kids. What did the two of you do for quiet us-time? It can be very cool to resurrect some of those.
You mention the two of you have been through a lot together recently. There's one very simple, but awesome thing you can do that I bet she's craving. A lot of us ladies do after having come through the other side of things. And it has the added benefit of not taking much work on your part, because the fact is, I'm betting you're craving some downtime too. Things such as you describe are as hard or harder on the caregiver.
Two simple words: hold her. Grab a blanket to snuggle under on the couch or the porch or the beach, put your arms around her, tell her you love her, and the two of you. Just. BE. Give her that safe, protective cocoon that encapsulates the two of you and keeps out the trials, the tribulations, the rest of the world. Put a movie in, watch the sun set, the waves crash, the people wander, the leaves rustle, whatever. Doesn't matter. Just be the two of you for a while.