Well I best start from the beginning here, as it may get complicated. My wife and I have been married for 4 years(nearly, next thrusday is the anniversary). When we got together, she expressed her interest in having sex with another woman. Being a man I'm like "HELL YEA!!!" But, and a big BUT, I'm more excited of merely watching her and only joining in IF she allows. I've been interested in joining a while ago, but it went away. We do enjoy watching porn together on occasion, and she has expressed arousal at the sight of a few of the women on the tv. We have never really gone through with her little fantasy. I don't bring it up often, as I don't want her to think I want to join in as soon as the two of them get going. And she dismisses it as soon as I bring it up or when I ask her if she has other fantasies that I don't know about or we havn't fulfilled.
My question is this, how can I get her more interested in it and ultimatly aid her in fulfilling her little fantasy? I want her to experience this. I dont want her to be dissappointed in not getting to do this.
Again, this is not me asking how do I get my wife to do a threesome with another woman, it is ALL about her. Thats how I get my pleasure, from pleasing her, not getting mine first. I make SURE she gets hers first. Any suggestions would be great. Thanks.
Sirene, great reply!!:rolleyes: get her in the situation while drunk!!!! (Please see the sarcasm in this)
To be able to constructively live out a fantasy one needs to be sober (the biggest problem with acting whilst fuelled by alcohol is regret) I would continue to discuss this as and when possible, try find out whether her fantasy is with someone known to her or with a stranger. This knowledge could empower you in further acting on the fantasy (if the fantasy is with someone known to her you would have to first find out the tendency/interest of the third party) if it is a stranger youi could either together advertise for a willing participanr or alternatively you could arrange a meeting of sorts as a surprise.
This said, I understand that you want to assist her in fulfilling her (and possibly subliminaly your) fantasy but are you sure your marraige and relationship can withstand the preassures that a threesome or sex with another will bring? Jealousy, regret, feelings of inadaquacy etc!!
Put her in the situation. You 2 together with another girl when you're all drunk.
[QUOTE=learning;155758]Sirene, great reply!!:rolleyes: get her in the situation while drunk!!!! (Please see the sarcasm in this)
To be able to constructively live out a fantasy one needs to be sober (the biggest problem with acting whilst fuelled by alcohol is regret) I would continue to discuss this as and when possible, try find out whether her fantasy is with someone known to her or with a stranger. This knowledge could empower you in further acting on the fantasy (if the fantasy is with someone known to her you would have to first find out the tendency/interest of the third party) if it is a stranger youi could either together advertise for a willing participanr or alternatively you could arrange a meeting of sorts as a surprise.
This said, I understand that you want to assist her in fulfilling her (and possibly subliminaly your) fantasy but are you sure your marraige and relationship can withstand the preassures that a threesome or sex with another will bring? Jealousy, regret, feelings of inadaquacy etc!![/QUOTE]
Not really, it's just she'll have the guts to do it when drunk. If she wakes up feeling regret, then she'll know she doesnt like it.
Me & my girlfriend do all sorts of dirty stuff together when drunk we wouldnt normally do when we're sober. We love being dirty & we love having dirty drunken sex. Its doing it, & then finding out you either like it or dont.
In fact most times we have sex we are drunk. Its great.
When people are drunk it gives them the guts to do things they wouldnt normally do, im sure she can still work out what she wants to do & what she doesnt want to do, even when drunk.
[QUOTE=Kiowa;155713]Again, this is not me asking how do I get my wife to do a threesome with another woman, it is ALL about her. Thats how I get my pleasure, from pleasing her, not getting mine first. I make SURE she gets hers first. Any suggestions would be great. Thanks.[/QUOTE]
Oh no, we wouldn't accuse you of doing this for your own satisfaction! :D
Seriously, if she really has a desire to do this, it shouldn't require you having to "convince" her to do it, should it?
Just let it go.
[QUOTE=ua322;155806]Seriously, if she really has a desire to do this, it shouldn't require you having to "convince" her to do it, should it?[/QUOTE]
It's not that I'm trying to convince her to doing it. It's just that she is a bit scared and apprehensive of it. I know deep down, she wants to. I just want her to feel comfortable in doing it. Believe me, she isn't scared to get crazy with me:D . I'm trying to please my wife, not get my jollies off with two women.
[QUOTE=Kiowa;155713]My question is this, how can I get her more interested in it....[/QUOTE]
I don't know, it kinda sounds like you are trying to "get her more interested in it."
[QUOTE=learning;155758]but are you sure your marraige and relationship can withstand the preassures that a threesome or sex with another will bring? Jealousy, regret, feelings of inadaquacy etc!![/QUOTE]
Exactly...
Say sirene your just a teen with a girlfriend so it's not the same issue as a married couple and being drunk is not a good idea because you can't undo the past and sex is a something serious, by the way while drunk I hope you remember BC I don't think you wil wake up next morining and not regret getting her pregnant.
Really you need to let your wife understand that you are ok with her fantasy and you seem to have done that so now you need to let her make the move or parhaps find out in more detail what she wants to do (known person or stranger)
[QUOTE=Sirene;155783]Not really, it's just she'll have the guts to do it when drunk. If she wakes up feeling regret, then she'll know she doesnt like it.
Me & my girlfriend do all sorts of dirty stuff together when drunk we wouldnt normally do when we're sober. We love being dirty & we love having dirty drunken sex. Its doing it, & then finding out you either like it or dont.
In fact most times we have sex we are drunk. Its great.
When people are drunk it gives them the guts to do things they wouldnt normally do, im sure she can still work out what she wants to do & what she doesnt want to do, even when drunk.[/QUOTE]
I can't help but cringe at this. If it is something you wouldn't normally do why does everything suddenly change when you have alcohol in your system? I'm not saying physically "what happens", of course. What I'm asking is that when you're sober and you're in your right mind and you wouldn't normally do something, isn't that your conscience telling you not to do something for a reason?
My point is this: if you don't do something while sober, you shouldn't do it while drunk. Even if she is drunk when she does it, if she remembers it and didn't want to do it from the beginning, she'll have guilt regardless of the alcohol.
The situation you suggest would not survive a good marriage. "Let's get my wife drunk so she'll be hornier and want to screw around with another woman". I love it...
yea and thats the guy that in another thread complains his girlfriend won't have sex often enough with him and she has guilt issues with sex in general well no wounder is that what you want her to do all the time sirene ?
[QUOTE=ExtraChrisB;156479]I can't help but cringe at this. If it is something you wouldn't normally do why does everything suddenly change when you have alcohol in your system? I'm not saying physically "what happens", of course. What I'm asking is that when you're sober and you're in your right mind and you wouldn't normally do something, isn't that your conscience telling you not to do something for a reason?
My point is this: if you don't do something while sober, you shouldn't do it while drunk. Even if she is drunk when she does it, if she remembers it and didn't want to do it from the beginning, she'll have guilt regardless of the alcohol.
The situation you suggest would not survive a good marriage. "Let's get my wife drunk so she'll be hornier and want to screw around with another woman". I love it...[/QUOTE]
Like I said, it's that she doesnt have the confidence to do it when sober. She thinks she's not attractive, but when she's drunk she doesnt give a crap. The more confident she becomes then the more we will do when sober. Alcohol gives her confidence. That's all it is. She gets the same urges when sober, just doesnt have the guts to go through with it.
"isn't that your conscience telling you not to do something for a reason?"
Balls to that, if it feels good then do it I say.
She's getting better & is getting more confidence as time goes on to do things she wouldnt normally do when sober.
If it feels good, do it?
lol somebody's not Catholic. Neither am I, but anyway...
I wouldn't go on that saying, personally. That's dangerous ground right there. Cheating on your spouse might feel good but it doesn't mean you should do it. Smoking marijuana may feel good, but that doesn't make it legal or safe. And on the same note, you shouldn't do anything while you're drunk that you wouldn't do while sober. Plain and simple. It's unethical, depressing, and will ruin this person's marriage.
[QUOTE=ExtraChrisB;156724]If it feels good, do it?
lol somebody's not Catholic. Neither am I, but anyway...
I wouldn't go on that saying, personally. That's dangerous ground right there. Cheating on your spouse might feel good but it doesn't mean you should do it. Smoking marijuana may feel good, but that doesn't make it legal or safe. And on the same note, you shouldn't do anything while you're drunk that you wouldn't do while sober. Plain and simple. It's unethical, depressing, and will ruin this person's marriage.[/QUOTE]
Damn right I'm no catholic. I'm a strong disbeliever in abstinence.
It's not cheating if he wants it too, he knows about it, it's right in front of him... no one's cheating anyone. I say go for it, if it feels good then do it again, if it feels bad then don't do it.
She might resent him in the end for stopping her from doing it, directly or indirectly, such as just being her partner of the opposite sex. She might actually go along with it had she been single. For that reason she should do it, unless she always wonders what i really would be like.