they r all right. when me and my boyfriend got together we had great intercourse but the first time i went to go down on him he said not to waste my time cause he couldnt cum that way. i told him that cant is not in the dictionary and i dont accept it in my bedroom. i told him he may not have been brought to climax by previous lovers that way but everyone is different. i spent 1hr 45 minute (man i had jaw ache!) going down on him just teasing and playing and eventually he came. so just relax and go with what ever makes u both feel comfortable and horny!

hey.. I had the same problem... my GF could NOT orgasm for the first 2 months of intercourse.... I was very upset and blah blah.. but I found out how.. and honestly.. it was through these boards.... you need to stop thinking about her orgasm. like the others said, it is HER ORGASM. not yours. everyone knows if you hear something enough, you believe it. correct? tell her she needs to not even think about having a orgasm, just let it flow. tell her that every day. she will stop thinking about her orgasm, and she'll begin to just enjoy the moment. the fact that she is already down in the dumps about having on, makes it 50x harder for her to orgasm anyways. i will go from my PERSONAL EXPERIENCE, THROUGH THIS BOARD AND HOW I USED IT.

1st... we couldn't cum.. PERIOD.
reason? I was too worried about it.. my worrying and talking about it made her feel like she was incapable of orgasm without a toy. so she believed it. only a toy could get her off.

2nd.. i came to the boards.. in search of help. they told me what you've read. that it is HERS.

3rd... i told her that in order for her to orgasm... she needs to just enjoy me being down on her.. nothing else.. feel relaxed and just enjoy that she is with her loving bf.

4th... it took me 25 minutes... licking her clit / gently flicking her nipples (at the same time).. and she came.. first time

2 months later...

5th... i tell her to spread herself apart so that the slit becomes the tiny little man in the boat.

6th.. swirl my tongue... flick up and down with the tip of my tongue alone... and lick downwards.. ALL ON THE LITTLE MAN IN THE BOAT (tip of the clit... lol)

7th... this is all while im playing with her nipples

8th... when she begins to orgasm.. it's just a regular one.. i move my hands off her nipples and force her hands away from her vagina... i then take control of spreading the wings.. and continue to lick.. with VIGOR. she orgasms like there is NO TOMORROW. one orgasm for her now lasts like 2-3 minutes. no lie. i lick until she basically shuts her body down.

after a "super" orgasm... we always get it on.. after sex... she's sleepy as hell and so am i..

currently working on:
getting orgasm w/o oral... she used a vibe since she was 15... trying to get her body not used to it is hard.. i think after much masturbation, she will cum by herself during sex.

i hope this helped.. i know it's a lot of reading.. but hey.. worked for me... everything after "it's her own orgasm" is my work... i figured those things out.. im sure u can find them on the forum, but im telling you here. enjoy

All I can say is it takes practice and a mature attitude about it. Not every woman can have an orgasm-vaginally or clitorally. (UNFORTUNATELY) It has alot to do with experience, this is where you gain knowledge. FOR EXAMPLE: Rubbing the clit from side to side to orgasm instead of up and down is just an experience issue! So, she must be masturbating at some point in her life in order to know how have an orgasm-and if she never has-well, maybe she's never masturbated? Is she under age of 23? She's probably physically not ready yet......just a thought.

Luv is right.
In that its HER orgasm, not yours.
Also, putting such high expectations that EVERYTHING has to end in an orgasm, can put too much pressure on both of you and you wont be able to actually enjoy it.
Kinda of the saying, enjoy the journey, not just the destination.
Sex isn't a race we all have to finish. You can enjoy the act without actually "finishing".
good luck

First off, "you" can't nor can anybody else "make" her cum, ,she has to be brought to a total state of relaxation IMHO. and she is the one really in charge of her own orgasm. She needs the "full" treatment!!...a quiet place,nice music,soft kisses,soft touches,(ask her where she loves to be touched),little wet licks on the neck...gentle carresses,perhaps even a full body massage(with warm oil), including her feet with lots of nice lotion..(you can darn near help some ladies orgasm just thru an awesome foot massage),if and when these above seem to be getting her warmed up...then you can start with paying attention to her breasts with gentle touching, and sucking and licking,if you are going down on her...kiss the insides of her thighs and make long licks on the insides...tease her mound of love with kisses...see if she is getting wet at this time...ask her as you are doing these things if she likes them...if not,,go back to where she was really enjoying something...just keep working at the things that she really enjoys,you'll be able to tell by the moans or sighs...it will take time...she just might be too scared about something..it could be from hang ups we've all had at one time or another...just take your time and always try to please her.....there are a million books written on this stuff ...so this is just a lil synopsis...LOL...good luck..