Serious relationships are not real/lasting so early on; however, when young the first love/puppy love is a real emotion. Lost my virginity to my boyfriend who I "loved" at he age of 14, no pressure, and no regrets. I still think if him often and now at my age, if he came knocking on the door? I'd be happy to see him but then again that's fantasy unless he is divorced and moved. :) It's been only, uhmmm, about 30 years now.

Maturity may be why you feel the way you do and there is no set schedule for for sex. Long term relationships don't last since both have many years to grow and experience life.

When you are ready you shall know & no rush. Just be certain you are protecting yourself and have values/ethics. Read around the forum on the index and get some good insight before you are in the situation. Good luck!

Hello Johnny, welcome to the SI101 Board and its Forums. I hope you enjoy participating.

I completely agree with you, yet what is a child to do who is being brought up by one or two parents who do not parent their child(ren) and who are strongly influenced by peer pressure. Also, hormones are raging with kids in your age bracket and they often rule a person's actions and thoughts instead of common sense.

Much can be enjoyed over the next several years from making out up to and including Foreplay when appropriate.

As for relationships, I subscribe to the school of reason that believes people should date lots of people over the next several years in order to sample what humanity has to offer us in the character of people and their likes, dislikes, quirks, moral and religious values, goals, interests, and more. The more people a person dates the better able they will be to recognize when Ms./Mr. Right comes along.

During the decade that are the teen years, kids are evolving and it takes that long to mature. Right now your body is more mature than your brain and the hormones are probably driving you to want sex and various other things. Just recognize these drives of desire for what they are.

By dating lots of girls you will also be able to experience the different activities and interests of others and perhaps have more dating acceptances. By dating and not entering into an exclusive relationship you side step the drama and trauma and angst associated with many "relationships". My recommendation is to keep dating casual until it is time later on to become serious about settling down. "You can have your 'cake' and 'eat it too'" without all the emotional entanglements that come along with exclusivity.

If by "sex" you mean intercourse and not just fooling around and making out, then I'm with you when it comes to learning about kids getting into trouble at anytime after puberty regardless of their grade in school. Much of their problems can be traced back to the lack of concerned parents or guardians who do not spend the time instilling values and educating their children on so many important matters including love and romance.

Ok doc, I am going to correct you on one thing. My parents were there, and I don't know if it was so much peer pressure. I met a guy, 4 years older, and well I wanted to please him. He may of pressured me, what did I know at 14 and well that was 33 years ago.
I did think for several years this was the guy I was going to marry, but I didn't and as I don't have any regrets that I didn't I don't have regrets that I slept with him. He was kind and loving, he loved me and well he knew what he was doing. I do regret that I was 14, maybe regret isn't the word for it. I wish that I had waited til I was older and wiser, but I thought I was mature. Yeah don't all 14 year old girls.
Like I said my parents were there. In their mind he was the older brother of one of my friends, which he was kinda. She was more the sister of my boyfriend, who was the same age as me. Kids lie, or don't tell the whole truth.
Being a virgin at 16, that's cool. And don't let anyone else tell you differently. I met a guy and well, I was looking for love. I may of lost my virginity at 14 but I only slept with him for 3.5 years. Then I broke up with him, not the time to get married it was the time to go to college. I didn't sleep with anyone else for 3 years.
Sex is awesome with the right person, and at the right time. In years to come these "kids" will realize that what they are doing now is not being an adult, being mature is waiting. Watch a few episodes of Maury, who wants to bring 15 guys to be tested to see which is the father of their child. And who wants to be a girl that sleeps with 15 men and not know which is. A mature relationship is one that lasts for years, where there is trust and communication and fidelity. You sleep with me and you only sleep with me, and that is a two way street. He's only with her and she's only with him. These "kids" have got all these hormones running thru their veins and well instead of controlling it they let it control them.
Alot of the talk is just that talk. Whatever, be the person you are. They'll get over it.

Doc;

Also can be added are over protective & over involved parents who instill the values & morals; however, have a teen with a mind of their own & thought they knew better, and was beginning to be a bit rebellious...:)

IMO, I think that when kids who are 13-15 are having sex, its not because they really want it, I think they do it for attention. I think at that time in your life you are too young to really appreciate a relationship.

[quote=CleverName;220901]IMO, I think that when kids who are 13-15 are having sex, its not because they really want it, I think they do it for attention. I think at that time in your life you are too young to really appreciate a relationship.[/quote]

Personally, it hormones. Not attention from anyone since no one else knew. But then again I married young, worked full time, was in college, and building a home by 20.

I had no pressure on me, we both knew we had a long haul ahead of us; both were going off to college; however, at the time it was a choice we made. Still many years later, 30, I think of him. Just before I married, the day before, he flew in to talk to me from California, I was engaged he was home. Perhaps I should have heard him out, called the wedding off, & life would be different. I know he always asks how I am through his sister. So was it so wrong?

The point is you never know unless you take a chance and live you life. Be happy & enjoy your youth, you grow up soon enough. When the time feels right, you know but try not to be judgemental of others who pick a different path.

In middle school, I had a friend who was always talking about some summer boyfriend whom she *almost* "went all the way" with. I always figured the boy was fictional and she was just saying it for attention. Possibly this is what your hearing about. False stories to boot importance.
I heard a long time ago about some eleven-year-old girl who got pregnant because she got drunk at a party (!!) and screwed a fifteen-year-old boy. And I know a girl who had a baby at fifteen, is not about seventeen, and is pregnant again, this time by a different boy.

I always heard the stories when I was in school about "going all the way". Most of them turned out to be false. I am not dumb enough to think that it doesn't happen. I think it is pry a lil less than what the 'kids' say it is. At least that was my experience in school.

If at 16 someone asks you if your having sex tell them that's it's none of their business. I didn't talk about my relationship back then, people knew I had a friend who I went everywhere with. I went everywhere with him and with him and his family. As much as I kept from my family his knew it all. They knew how old I was and well it was their house they knew I was in his bed at night and not in his sister's room.
They never once talked to my parents and well my parents didn't talk to them either. My parents trusted their kids. All both my brothers and myself had them pretty well snowed. I'm just glad I never came home pregnant, that would of killed my dad. But you don't think of those things, hind site is 20/20.

Well see, I am talking about kids who are younger then 15. I hardly think they are fully aware of the responsibilites of sex.

I was 14 the first time, now that I am 47 I can look back. I've been there and done it and well, I had a LOT of fun. His family had a plane so we did the mile high club. I spent more weekends in New York City, where he went to college, and I don't think my parents knew I left the state. I lived in Michigan. My friends crack up but I can get it all out of their kids, I've been there and done it. If you don't ask the right questions, in the right manner, they can pull it off. Well only if they were as clever as Chik. I had two brothers and a dad no way was I bringing a "boyfriend" home. The first one I brought home I was 21.
When I left jr high, 9th grade, my younger brother who was a year behind me in school put this out. "you get my sister drunk, you give my sister drugs, you mess with my sister and you will NOT live to see the sunrise." I found this out when I was 19, but lets just say if it wasn't for the guy I was already seeing behind everyones back my high school years would of been crap. My brother wasn't all that big but he was the most popular boy in school. Me? I was invisable. lol If only they all knew. Crack me up.
So I didn't go to any dances, we went to all the football games. Sat in the other teams stands. And I did have a life out of school, life in it well there are highs and lows there too but I only smile now.
I thought I was all that and a bag of chips. I look back now, and no I don't have regrets but I would of done things a whole lot different if I had to do it all again.

I like to put it like this.

What they do, is their business.
What you do, is your business.
You are no one to judge.
They may see things a different way than you do, and this is why there's the word "disagreement".

If it doesn't affect you, why do you even care?
Worry about yourself, and YOUR life not the life of others. If this is what you sit around thinking about, maybe you need to pick up a hobby or add another to the ones you already have.

[quote=CleverName;221025]Well see, I am talking about kids who are younger then 15. I hardly think they are fully aware of the responsibilites of sex.[/quote] I was aware, responsible, and 14...no regrets.

[FONT=Times New Roman][SIZE=3]I remember back in middle school when I was 12 or 13 I wanted to screw just about anything that moved. Luckily for me, it took me a few years to figure out how to get what I wanted. There were stories of guys getting head in 8th grade and a couple of guys going all the way, but it suspected that they were mostly, if not all fictional. [/SIZE][/FONT]