How can we have longer sex?

[pc4cb]

Hi all

I have been with my partner for 5 months, we both felt like we have been together for a lonnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnng time but it only have been 5 months. We have been having sex for 3 months and we both still enjoy it, but the thing is, the first few months we have had sex, it was great, last a long time but lately we have had even better sex BUT last a short time, he said it have never been a problem before til now and I'm really flattered that I make him comes quicker but we both want a long sex, we know theres something like pills, but we want to find out if theres any ways we can have sex longer that we can do it by ourselves?

Thank you, have a nice day.

Pamela

[Brandye]

About a year ago, one of the women's magazines asked readers "how long did your most recen sex last." The answers ranged from 3-13 minutes. Other research (always anecdotal or interview) shows that the typical sex act lasts two minutes until the male ejaculates.

THERE ARE NO PILLS TO PROLONG SEX! The creams to apply to the penis are simply topical anesthetics that reduce sensation.

Look up the "squeeze technique."

[EvilEvilKitten]

STOP IT!

Who said that you only get to enjoy him once per night???

Do The Program, see above sticky posts, 4 times and then we'll talk. Each round should take about 45 minutes with a 15 minute hydration & rest break before you pounce upon him again.

He's a man not a machine. So expect to do some seducing and a bit of work yourself.

Through extensive 'training' he'll calm down and get better control and you will orgasm more easily as well. Win-win situation.

[pc4cb]

EvilEvilKitten,

Ok, I gotta admit I didn't like what I read on your post, you don't know me and my partner. We don't have sex everynight! We both only have sex when WE BOTH want it, not just me or just him, I would never pressured him to have sex with me just because I want it. We have sex when we are in the sexual mood. What make you think that he do all of the work himself? What make you think I don't seduce him? I am not complaining that it last a short time, my partner is always the one who is disappointed that it lasts a short time, I always assured him that there is nothing to be disappointed at, that we will find out why it is happening cause it never happened to him before, and I assured him that sex isn't everything, just go to bed and cuddle up and kisses before sleep. I love him for him, not sex. He actually asked me to come here and ask this for him because I'm member of this, and he is not member of it. I'll go and read this sticky posts you mentioned now.

[dancingdoc2]

Originally Posted by pc4cb

Hi all

We have been having sex for 3 months and we both still enjoy it,

Three out of five, not bad--and you are still enjoying it. I'm wondering from this statement if you will still be enjoying it in twelve months or sixty or 144? (Actually, just kidding, I guess it is the use of the word "still" that raised my curiosity about why and why wouldn't you.

but the thing is, the first few months we have had sex, it was great, last a long time but lately we have had even better sex BUT last a short time, he said it have never been a problem before til now and I'm really flattered that I make him comes quicker but we both want a long sex, we know theres something like pills, but we want to find out if theres any ways we can have sex longer that we can do it by ourselves?

There are no pills or potions. Yes, there is something the two of you can do and that is to learn more about the art of making love. For this, please begin reading the articles listed in the Index found at the top of the main screen.

How are you defining "sex"? Are you referring to the entire process of fooling around and making out followed by intercourse, OR, are you using "sex" and intercourse interchangeably?

It is important to understand the definitions in order to know what needs fixing: making out? Intercourse? Both?

Sex = Romance
Begin planting the seeds of romance hours to a day before actually getting down to business. Plant love notes, plant suggestions, whisper sweet nothings into each other's ear, etc., et cetera, etc.

Sex = Making out
Much has been written appearing both in the Forums as well as in articles listed in the Index. Great make out sessions can last minutes for the proverbial "Quickie", to hours for full involvement of the emotions and psyches.

If the two of you are spending less than half an hour to making out then you are rushing the proceedings. It generally takes a woman a good half hour of kissing, caressing, hugging, cuddling, fondling, and so on before her level of arousal has been piqued and then peaked. For the fellas reading this, if you believe that the way to a great orgasm is from lots and lots of stroking then you are placing the cart before the horse.

Sex = Intercourse
If you want intercourse to last and last, then take periodic breaks and return to making out in between.

If your desire is for prolonged make out sessions, then simply keep each other's interests alive. It is important to understand that as long as there is sufficient interest and desire a couple can continue to make love for hours and have several orgasms during. Just understand that for both there is a down time or recovery period that varies in duration for each. Once this has past, there is nothing preventing either of you from enjoying one or more orgasms.

Several women have reported that they become sore, bored, and tired, when intercourse lasts longer than about ten minutes. If it want to prolong it, why take a chance, simply take a break, return to making out, peak each others arousal and begin, again.

So getting what the two of you want is not about pills, its about methods and techniques. I recommend that the two of you do some reading as noted, and then discuss what you have learned. Knowedge is empowering!

I hope this is of help. Got questions?

[EvilEvilKitten]

And yet - those sexual moods are coming less and less frequently and for shorter and shorter periods - aren't they? Of course he's worried! He's afraid it will stop altogether and you end up havig sex maybe once in a blue moon like most long term arrangements!

STOP IT.

This isn't about 'pressuring' this is about INVITING. If you prefer to wait for the bus rather than building one, there's little anyone can do to help him out.

Whether you pounce upon his poor defenceless body or just walk around naked wearing only a pair of stilettos is up to you. Sometimes, one just has to get in the mood.

This is also about making the deliberate choice to amp up your sex lives and give it the priority sex should have in your relationship. I have been married to the same man for more than 30 years and even now cuddling had better lead to orgasms all around or I will pounce upon his poor defenceless body and make him give it up! Let him off easy? No way! The cuddling is for afterwards or in between bouts - never instead.

Because you have enough 'real life' when out of bed, off at work, paying blls, doing your taxes, dealing with the in-laws, taking care of the house, yadda, yadda, yadda.

Playtime (sex) is your time to shine! Your time to exchange 'tokens of mutual esteem and affection' and to give eachother the ego boosts of a lifetime! The conflagration of souls that reaffirms life itself - and why would you ever want to wait for that when you really do not have to?

[abza]

try different sex potsions and the location in which are using sometimes it does. mean that you should do it in different areas,try to use all your five sences,have a music backround .

[EvilEvilKitten]

As a female friend of mine once said "why kill them with kindness when you can use an axe?"
(chuckling)
Such a delightful woman!

[dancingdoc2]

> the first few months we have had sex, it was great, last a long time but lately we have had even better sex BUT last a short time, he said it have never been a problem before til now and I'm really flattered that I make him comes quicker but we both want a long sex,

I just reread your original post and am confused by what your reference to "it" lasting a long time, now not so much. Do you mean that the entire episodes are not lasting as long, or, do you mean that your boyfriend is unable to hold off a climax as long as he used to?

If the latter, please read this article listed in the Index:

Squeeze & Training Exercise for Controlling Premature Ejaculation

Getting a fella to last longer is often a problem the younger the person is. Here are four accepted methods:

1. He should masturbate any time from an hour before make love to perhaps four hours beforehand.
2. While making love, bring him to climax as early into the episode as convenient, then, let him recover by going thru his refractory period that usually lasts between 5 and 30 minutes. During this down time, continue to make out. When he is ready to go, again, he will be able to hold off an orgasm longer.
3. Use the Squeeze technique. This method works well when the sensations of an impending climax sneak up on him.
4. Master the technique practiced in the article in order for him to be able to associate those sensations and can jog his conscious brain away from the intoxicating drive to go beyond the point of no return. When he has learned to do this, he can will himself to pause the proceedings and let his sense of urgency subside before continuing on. Doing this will prolong sex/intercourse.