Encouraging my husband not to finish inside me

[sarah_rsl]

I'm trying to get my husband not to finish inside me all the time. It's not a big thing just a personal preference. Usually after shagging I'm in the mood for a cuddle and a snooze but if he finishes in me I'm usually a bit icky and feel compelled to get up and have a wash.

Its just so much easier if and finishes somewhere I can just give a quick wipe. But for some reason it really phases him, he could be just about to come but if he pulls out of me it'll just throw him.

We can manage if I use my mouth but even that takes a bit of effort.It's not just the case of putting him in my mouth I'll actually have to give him oral for quite a while, that's despite the fact that he's usually on the verge of finishing when he pulls out. He'd obviously prefer to keep doing it, but I wonder if its something he could get the hang of.

It's never been an issue in previous relationships, most men if given the option have preferred to finish on my tummy or boobs. but for some reason it's not his thing.

we've been together a while now, it's not a big deal but it would make bed time a lot easier on me.

any ideas?

[Gibson52]

Get some good sexy oil, and try finishing really tight, with your hand. Tell him something like you've always have this wild fascination everytime wanting, to see or feel the cum squirt out..just to feel it and touch it (when you found the right man). Tell him it is a secret fantasy of yours, that you've never had fulfilled, and you thought he'd think you were crazy if you told him...so you can say, "well I have always had this crazy fascination" "would you do that for me"? It you want some more dirty dialouge (from a mans perspective) that may encourage him to do this, and save you from the icky feeling wanting to get up and wash, send me a private email. I hope this helps.

[dancingdoc2]

> I'm trying to get my husband not to finish inside me all the time. It's not a big thing just a personal preference. Usually after shagging I'm in the mood for a cuddle and a snooze but if he finishes in me I'm usually a bit icky and feel compelled to get up and have a wash.

Don't you become all icky from perspiration and your vaginal mucus as a function of becoming aroused?

Whether he climaxes inside you or somewhere on your skin, there is going to be some wiping required. There will be a puddle to clean up, or, there will be some leakage from the vagina. If you do not wish to get out of bed (or wherever) to go tidy up, why not just keep a damp washcloth close by. Makes sense to us.

[Brandye]

Doc hits the point. Wherever that little dollop ends up, it needs a wiping. Keep a few finger towels available at bedside.

Unlike you, I prefer the ejaculation in that part of me designed to extract semen. A little towel placed appropriately delays the need for washing up.

[Buck Naked]

If you use your sexy voice and tell him where to "deposit" it I'm sure he'll listen. At the end of many porn scenes you can hear the woman telling him where she wants it and it's pretty sexy. Just a thought, but it would work for me.

[dancingdoc2]

> But for some reason it really phases him, he could be just about to come but if he pulls out of me it'll just throw him.

Does it through his "game" any more than if he just paused in the normal course of stroking, or, if you pause what you have been doing before continuing?

> We can manage if I use my mouth but even that takes a bit of effort.It's not just the case of putting him in my mouth I'll actually have to give him oral for quite a while, that's despite the fact that he's usually on the verge of finishing when he pulls out. He'd obviously prefer to keep doing it, but I wonder if its something he could get the hang of.

Have you been to the Index and read the article all about this and how to solve the matter? Sarah, you've been a member of the community for a year and a half, I'm surprised this is a problem still waiting to be solved. All that should be required is a bit of "show and tell". I speak a lot about sex being a partnership of doing for and not to... and of communication being key. The article explains the necessity of showing how to stimulate each other and how to communicate how we are responding and for what we need now/next. Please read the article and put the tools described into practice. Let us know how it works for you.

I hope this is of help. Got questions?

[EvilEvilKitten]

How would you feel if he got you to just to that point where you're about to orgasm and he said - "ICK! The idea of you orgasming while I'm inside of you is just so GROSS!" - and pulled out?

Would you enjoy it?

Just pointing out that this question isn't about mess - it is about control.

[constantlylearning]

EEK will always analyze the question from all angles................

[EvilEvilKitten]

I always try to see issues from all sides. In this case, she's promoting her cause so I thought that I would promote his.

[YHeloThar]

that last couple strokes for a guy are the absolute best and are literally what we are driven towards. i guess you can do something else for him by rubbing his penis head right at the end with some kind of lubricant but that seems just as messy no?

finish in your mouth? if he can't ejaculate anymore once he's out you might need to help him a bit with your mouth.