Anal?

[cuteone123]

Hi. My boyfriend is really very obsessed with my butt. He would love to do anal, but I just am not comfortable with it. I have let him try it a few times, and it hurts really really bad. He said he would drop it, but now (months later) wants to do it again. How can I make him understand that it really is very painful to me, and as much as I love him and want to let him fulfill his fantasies about it, can't stand it?

[llblovesejw]

does he play with it in any other way or was your first anal experience just jumping straight to sex?

[cuteone123]

yeah, we started playing months before that. sometimes it was comfortable/enjoyable and other times it wasn't.

[llblovesejw]

sorry about the personal questions, but i'm trying to access the situation. have you ever used vibrators or dildos? or just fingers and such?

[cuteone123]

just fingers

[Ephemera]

Nothing to do but tell him that anal is off limits.

You gotta give it to him straight. Clearly define your own boundaries.

[dancingdoc2]

Hello, and welcome to the Board and its Forums. I hope you enjoy participating.
Our major reason for being is to help others by providing how-to information, and information. It is important to know that anal play and stimulation should never be painful. Plenty of couples incorporate anal play and prostate massage into their lovemaking, regularly. What your boyfriend did was wrong only in the fact that he did not learn the proper technique beforehand. So, if you have an open mind on this, please read the article linked below and try, again. Both of you can benefit and enjoy the stimulation that comes from the activity.

You will find an Index at the top of the main screen that contains links to many helpful insightful articles, some with how-to information, also. Please browse the Index and read those articles that interest you.

"Playing Ball" and How To Tips for Prostate Massage
This is also an excellent tutorial for people interested in and concerned about the how-to of Anal stimulation as well as play.

I hope this is of help.

[LustyLisa]

It's ok to establish boundries and expect that they will be respected. You've given it a try and discovered that it isn't for you. Now it's time to see where you and your feelings stand in this relationship. He may feel that if you love him you'll sacrifice and allow it from time to time but that's a sword that cuts both ways, if he loves you he'll understand and respect your wishes. Anal may in fact be a deal breaker for him which is his right too but when it comes to your body, your feelings should be paramount. Make a stand and don't believe that you are selfish for being true to yourself. You shouldn't have to defend your boundries and your body over and over again.

[shaved bi]

Try using a small dildo with a lot of lube. Then work up to a larger size as the anal muscles relax. When the dildo is about the same size as his penis and there is no pain, then you are ready.

[EvilEvilKitten]

Grab a dildo and try doing it on him.
Maybe then he'll "get a clue".
If he doesn't - say goodbye and move on.

You know - it isn't necessary to do everything your guy wants.

Should you care to be "nuce" about it - sit him down and ask him how would he feel if you constantly demanded him do something that he did not enjoy? Badgering a lover is the mark of a selfish lover and never a good thing.