Things have changed

[codeguy]

I was in a 12 year relationship that ended in 2007. I started dating a wonderful woman in 2008. Sex was great, best I ever had in my life. She texted me all the time, wrote me wonderful e-mails and letters and then 3 months later it was like a switch was flipped and it all ended. It suprised me because I never thought she would just stop being who she was. I struggled for quite a while to understand everything. Sex stopped for about 5 months and then she finally had sex with me but it was just more of a "taking one for team" type of thing. She says that it is her libido and that she always had problems with it. She even once said that sex has alwayed been like this in her relationships. It just doesn't make sense to me since we had great sex in the beginning and she was totally into it. I just don't know what to do and we have already talked about it several times. I love her a lot but this is a definite issue that I don't think she really cares about. Any thoughts?

[EvilEvilKitten]

Sex has always been like this for her in all of her relationships - and she has NOT fixed it yet? And she wonders why she has been having problems with relationships?

Excuse me?

Oh, I suppose the man is just supposed to accept this "bait and switch" behavior?

Either she gets herself checked out thoroughly or you should move on. Why?
Because she has a known issue that she is not addressing that adversely impacts someone she professes to care about.

Judge by her actions, not her words, and move on, buddy.

[Brandye]

Sex is always more exciting at the beginning of the relationship - things are new and novel. Dhe evidently cannot make the transition to a more mature relationship which requires interest and a little work. See Evil's response above.