more kink please!

[dlb]

Sex doesn't have to be about who is dominant and who is submissive, not even B&D and S&M HAVE to be about that. Many people who are into bondage actually avoid the terms dominant and submissive prefering to be called rigger,captor, or perpetrator rather than dominant and model, captive, victim, rope bunny or some other more pleasing term than submissive. O course some bondage folk ar very much into the Ds thing; to each his own.

My point is that sex, however kinky it may or may not be, should be a mutual effort. If you are using bondage and discipline and someone has to take a "dominant" role you might try roleplaying, which is a big part of B&D anyway- the "dominant" is a kidnapper/cop/boss/teacher/pirate/robber and the "submissive" is the victim/criminal/student/etc.
Otherwise you don't neeed to think-I tied/chained someone now I'm dominant. In recent years I have been drawn to Japanese style rope bondage in which it is definitely a team effort for BOTH parties to have more fulfilling sex. That's the way I have always felt and the way we do things around my house.

[constantlylearning]

I suppose it means something different to each individual person.

[EvilEvilKitten]

Only two years and you have ALREADY exhausted your repetoire of ideas?!?!

[kinkypair]

I think the problem was that we jump right into getting things more interesting and rushed through everything. We have now decided that we would each make a list of things we would like to try sexually. Its an anything and everything list. Then we thought we could work on eachothers lists and take our time with these ones. If we try something and decide its only "ok" then we can try different variations and see if we can improve it! Im thinking that these could take us awhile cause im already up to 52 things! I have gotten some great ideas for this site! Gotta love the 3-d positions! If anyone has some other ideas for me... feel free to fire them off! The more the better!!

[EvilEvilKitten]

It is as I suspected. Instead of perfecting regular sex - they just skipped over turning ehhh into wow and went right into kink. Please see the sticky posts entitled, The Program, Body Worship, and The Posterior Fornix. You might just surprise yourselves.

[dlb]

Originally Posted by kinkypair

I think the problem was that we jump right into getting things more interesting and rushed through everything. We have now decided that we would each make a list of things we would like to try sexually... im already up to 52 things! I have gotten some great ideas for this site! Gotta love the 3-d positions! If anyone has some other ideas for me... feel free to fire them off! The more the better!!

The list a cool idea. We have a black velvet bag with folded pieces of paper in it. Each piece of paper has a situation, game or act to try. She puts her hand in the bag, draws a piece of paper out and we do what it says. Sort of like your list but with an aleatoric element.

And looking at the animated positions here, or buying one of the many great sex manuals out there is good, because you just might find a new variant on something you have already tried if not something completely new.

And another thing that you might find incredible is to just get back to basics: learn to touch, caress, kiss, hug,hold and seduce each other again as if you were just beginning your relationship. It seems that in many couples those simple things are forgotten and I can tell you from personal experience that getting back to the basics can set you off on the road to reaching new heights and discvoering and exploring new territories.

best wishes,
dlb

[constantlylearning]

Still begs the question on what constitutes "kink".........I guess it has a different
meaning to many people.

[dlb]

Originally Posted by constantlylearning

Still begs the question on what constitutes "kink".........I guess it has a different
meaning to many people.

My point exactly. It has a different meaning to different people. I have a friend who is that adamant that kink does not have to be limited to sex!