inviting outsiders in

[fock_her]

My wife and I are very sexually expressive. There is nothing that we have tried that we did not enjoy, and we have tried just about anything there is to try, with the exception of threesomes and group sex.

I have been away for about 9 months now (work-related) and we often talk about sex and tell each other about masturbation. We both think of group sex quite often, sometimes involving one other woman, sometimes another man, sometimes more than 1 other person. Actually we think about that more than anything else it seems like.

So we talked about it seriously for a while and we both wonder if things would change after it happened. We even went as far as to discuss the "rules" in the event something like that did happen. In the end, we both decided that things would be best for our relationship if things stayed between the two of us. Besides, if you fulfill all of your fantasies, what else will you fantasize about. However, we are going on a vacation soon, and both are not ruling out the possibility of something like that happening.

Is this something to plan for, plan against, or just let it happen. Is this a recipe for disaster?

thanks for your thoughts

[sera300]

If you search the topic of threesomes you will see many which have had success others with disasters.

[fock_her]

Originally Posted by sera300

If you search the topic of threesomes you will see many which have had success others with disasters.

damned if you do, damned if you don't haha

[dancingdoc2]

Yup! what she says.

> So we talked about it seriously for a while and we both wonder if things would change after it happened.

My assessment is that if you are into this from a recreational sex point of view than threesomes can be enjoyable and successful. The operative term is "can be".

If you are a loving couple who is enjoying sex as an outward expression of the love the two of you have for each other, then bringing in a third person is more apt to end in disaster for the two of you.

Three is a crowd. The two scenarios do not mix.

[EvilEvilKitten]

*Ahem* If you and your wife can separate love (the emotional bond) from sex (the physical play) then you can safely enjoy threesomes and group sex. Both of which are FUN! If you find you cannot, then just give it up.

I recommend getting in touch with your local swing or lifestyle group and attending one of their socials - no sex involved at these btw, just flirting. If either of you tend to be jealous and/or possessive, then stay away or grow out of it. Those in the lifestyle will be happy to discuss this with you but they do not care for any dramatics.

One point: within the lifestyle, women rule! Whatever the wives say, goes. Women usually find the lifestyle empowering because now they can give up worrying if they are cute enough, good enough, or slim enough. They can stop worrying about modesty, apologising for their desires, and thinking there's something wrong with sex. A benefit for both of you is the honesty and openness that blossoms between you two. This enrichment of your marriage will surprise you. You will both learn new things about each other.

As to "what will we fantasize about afterwards" - there remains a lot available depending upon just how extreme you want to get. You are limited only by your imaginations. Swings are fine but I would not recommend the trapeze.