Couple Crush

[nottooblushing]

So is it completely weird that my fiance and I as a couple have a crush on another couple? I'm pretty damn sure they feel the same way given some events of the last few days. But I've always been terminally monogamous and this is all strange. Like I spent my adolencence dealing with the fact that I liked girls & boys ... I don't even know where to file this in the sexuality bank.

[wellmannered_squirrel]

Have you talked to your girlfriend about it ?

What were the events that made you think it was reciprocal?


It doesn'T sound too strange to me

[Engage!]

So if it's reciprocal, what are you wanting to do?

[nottooblushing]

Well the 4 of us kinda fooled around everybody fooling with everybody else. My fiance (male) and I were both cool about it and there was no awkwardness afterward. I guess, has anybody been in a situation like this? Like we are both attracted to both of them and vice-versa. What I am really looking for is a more experienced voice in situations like this.

[Carrina]

I have been thru this about 8 years ago.

One major rule:

1) Make sure your Fiance and you have rules before hand. Do's and dont's. Really helps make sure that there is no lines that you cross. Or at least Disscuss it with him, ask him if there is anything that the other couple could do to make him upset. And Vice-versa for you.

[Sustayned]

I have no personal experience but my brother and his wife got involved in something like this. So did two other couples I know very well.
All ended in disaster. I think that if you have real feelings for your fiance, and want some kind of relationship that lasts, you're playing with fire.

[nottooblushing]

Ended in disaster is not very specific. And obviously, since we get married in 3 weeks, my relationship with him is my 1st priority. But I could use a little more information.

[EvilEvilKitten]

Hello. This is nothing unusual - it is called swinging. As long as you and your partner trust eachother and trust your emotional bond - all will be well. But only the strong marriages can survive the impact of swinging. But there are some protocols you should follow:

1. never hunt for other couples alone - ALWAYS go out together.
2. establish your groundrules before you go and abide by them
3. understand that in this world - women rule

Yes, I have done, am doing and will do this in the future. It is fun!

[Sustayned]

To be specific; First, my brother and his wife: They made friends with another couple and all were instantly best friends. Spent a lot of time together. Both had boys that were one year-old and in general, all seemed well. I had never known anyone who had done this type of thing so I thought, "well, if it's okay with all, then why not?" So for about a month or so, they would get together and would have sex with each others' spouses. Sounds like a happy time for all.
Then we started noticing that his bride began to talk about the other husband incessantly. She didn't even realize she was doing it. But you could tell this was more than just a pillow poke type thing. It wasn't long before my brother told me that his wife said she wanted a divorce because she and this other husband were in love and told him that when he came once a week to see me (his brother) she and the other guy used that evening to do whatever they wanted. Both couples divorced and their kids suffered greatly.
The second such relationship I know became a good friend through our daughter. My daughter and the friend's daughter were best friends in elementary school. Soon it was back and forth to each other's houses and the friend's mother began to confide in my wife at first, then me that she and her husband had gotten into a swinging type thing with another couple down the street and her husband and the other wife wound up sampling each other on their own when their spouses were not around.
This wound up in a very ugly divorce and the friend's husband didn't wind up with the other girl anyway because the other girl was apparently a sexual athlete but completely psycho otherwise.
The third that I know of was nearly identical to my brother's situation and wound up not only in divorce, but divorce just as the wife was giving birth to a second child who grew up without benefit of a father around and is today in a drug rehab and has done all of the nasty things one might expect of someone who feels that their closest friend is a crack pipe.
I don't know. You can draw you own conclusions but my personal take on this is that it is not just coincidence that there is a breakdown in the relationship after something like this. After all, you've both already consented to screwing someone else, so why should it be a big deal if they do it when you're not around? Just a matter of timing then right?
I think right now while everyone has a crush on everyone else, you'll do anything to tell yourself it will be different. And I hope it will. But when the orgasms have subsided, the ejaculation has occurred, I think deep down, there will be some way different views on this and it will almost certainly undermine your relationship. Why don't you hold off on the marriage until you get this out of your system. And for God's sake, please don't make any babies in the meantime.
All of the kids from all three of my stories fared very badly throughout life and my nephew (my brother's only son) finally escaped from a hideous home life by joining the Army. After being his own man for nearly a year and loving it, he was killed in Iraq. This may sound like a lecture or like it's from Dr. Laura or something but this is true life and you did ask for specifics...so there they are.

[EvilEvilKitten]

What did I say?

"But only the strong marriages can survive the impact of swinging."