Excitement?

[Yariome]

Me and my girlfriend are still really happy together, going on 2 1/2 years, and we still believe we have a future together. Anyways, I just feel that i'm not all that much anymore, entertaining wise, and I know I have to accept that sometimes people just get used to things and not as exciting... None the less I don't want to give up, some of the best times in my life are when we are just chilling and wrestling around or whatever, just smiling and whatever... But those are rare, as oppose to when we first got together and it was daily.

Now I can accept that this is going to happen, or more-so I NEED to accept it... But does anyone have any suggestions on how to make anything more exciting? Our sex life is still entertaining, i've got a good job, I mean overall I have a pretty good life because of the hard work i've had to do to make it this way. I'm cool with it, but I just want her to be as excited around me as she used to be, at least every once in awhile like she used to.

[sera300]

You have to make more of an effort, both, to keep the excitement. It will never be the same as it was initially because you are now both comfortable and content.

Have you thought of just taking a few days and going somewhere you have never been? It does not have to be a place that's elaborate, just a few days away together in a different environment. Do you bring her flowers? Go out to dinner as a dress up date? Make reservations at a nice place, have her dress nicely and you do the same? Or pick a nice place to go for a hike, pack a small lunch, fresh fruit, cheeses, and wine and just relax after you climb? Go rollerblading together? Try ballroom dancing lessons together? I found when the relationship gets comfortable, do something entirely new that you have not done before, it's a new experience for you both, and you share it together & this brings back the spark. he accomplishment as a couple & the enjoyment makes you both smile & realize how important you are to each other.

[Yariome]

Well I don't have the money to do the first option yet, and for the most part yes I have tried a lot of those things and they are fun, well at least the things that she would find interesting.

[sera300]

What is she into doing? Sometimes doing something new that you may think is boring turns out to be fun done as a couple.

[Yariome]

Mostly, she likes to sit at home and roleplay on this fantasy site. And likes to write, well when she alone anyways, and when she is out with me she just likes to relax, which is cool and we do go out, but I mean there isn't all that much exciting stuff in Missouri to do

[Yariome]

I mean I really am open to all ideas, and I appreciate yours, as will try some of them. So don't think i'm being a hypocrite or anything lol, just frustrated.

[HardNgood]

Why is it that people crave "excitement"?? I truly believe this is a misguided statement! It seems that most younger people EXPECT instant gratification...everything has to be "right now"...remember folks..life is short and being dead is for a loooooooooooooooong time...There is no such thing as McNuggets when it comes to relationships...treat relationships as growing flowers...it takes time..it takes patience, it takes work, when you do all the right things and things don't turn out..you must learn to cut your losses..

[Alchemist911]

My advice is dont spend too much time doing nothing. Go out with ya girl,Bars and get "Nice" every now and then, hit a club and go dancin...or take weekend trips here and there....stay busy and then when you are home its gonna feel 10x better to just kick it and relax.

I know what you mean....losing the excitement f*cks everything up!

[Yariome]

Alright, I like what you are saying.

And as for HardNgood i'm not looking for that, i'm looking to not for her to be looking at the clock when we are hanging out, calm down man.

[Nomyud]

For me, best thing to work so far is to call my fiance before I get on the train and the conversation is pretty much

"Do you have any plans tonight?"

"no"

"Don't make any"

Then on the 36-minute train ride home, I plan out a mini-date with a setting, time-line and budget. Get home, get dressed, get in the car, go out and enjoy.

Other times, it's not even an outside date. It can be a foot massage, cooking a new dish, watching a movie from blockbuster, taking a walk around the neighborhood or even whipping out the telescope with a book on star formations on a clear night. Pretty much, keep doing the weird, pathetic, embarassing and romantic stuff you did in the first place that made you both fall in love with eachother and get together.

The Fire doesn't stay burning unless you keep putting in more wood right? Just don't make the same mistake as every other guy and assume keeping the relationship going revolves around loads of spontaneous Passionate sex, that's just the tinder that flares things up once in a while