4yrs and a baby, what do i do?

[scb07]

I have been with my bf for 4 yrs and we have a child together now. I love him to death but when it comes to sex there is nothing there. I don't know if it's me or him. He cums no problem and me, it has NEVER happened. I have taken suggestions from friends on things to try and nothing has worked. I find myself not wanting to have sex with him anymore. I gave up awhile ago on trying to fix our (my) problem. Could it be him? I am still young and should not be having these problems, so any suggestion on what to do?

[EvilEvilKitten]

You need to learn to masturbate to orgasm. You also need to change how you do things because having a child out of wedlock wasn't very bright. Condoms, a new man while maintaining ties, because of the child, with this one, and getting on with your life - that's what you should do now. School, job/career, day care, a home - all of that lies before you. FUN!

[Say Hey]

How old is the baby? A new baby brings alot of stress to the situation along with the things kitten mentioned. I know for my wife it was a while before she had an orgasm after our child was born. It was like the kid flipped a switch or something. Over time it happened again as we settled into life again. I say take it slow and learn to masturbate yourself to an orgasm most likely without him around. This is so that if it takes a while you do not feel the pressure of him there wanting sex. If it take an hour or mosre so be it. Jsut take your time and relax and let the orgasm happen naturaly. Don't let this add more to your stress.

[Brandye]

About one-quarter of women never experience orgasm. This is, in most cases, not because they cannot but because they have never learned how. I have had patients in their thirties with several children experience their first orgasms and one woman was 54!

You will have to fix this yourself and then get him involved. Get the book Our Bodies Our Selves and visit clitical.com. You will have to learn to masturbate to orgasm so that you know what you are looking for. And to learn what works. You can talk to your family physician or gyn. They usually have referrrals they can make for you to responsible sex counselors.

In addition to the quarter of us who never reach orgasm, another half (I am in this group) require some stimulation otheer than penetration and thrusting to make it. Practice! and then teach him.