GUYS: Taking A Break?

[bilovely]

I posted earlier about some of my problems, and here are some more, kind of.

After a weekend of a light bickering, my b/f and I return to college and a few hours later I get a call saying "I'm done" from him, and we exchanged all of our stuff back. I was very confused and didn't talk to him for a day, and then he started talking to me online, been helping each other with homework at computer labs, and hanging out with other friends together. We are totally social and I have no hard feelings against him, so we started talking and he told me that he is worried that we would spend our senior year of high school through college together and not see other ppl, worrying that if we did end up married eventually, we would realize then that we weren't meant to be.

Sounds like a great idea to me, he wants to date me (take me to out dinner, movies, just some fun stuff) and still be able to date other people if we wish to. I am enjoying flirting again to an extent and looking forward to some dates, truly being single for a while and enjoying life. But he says that eventually he may realize that we are meant to be.

Has anyone out there ever been through this, guys in particular. I am fine if we never get back together, and if things work out I wouldn't mind being with him if I am still happy with that.

Somebody make me understand this a little more.

[Ratach]

I wouldn't know what to say in this case. I am one of those guys that actually wants to settle down into a relationship. And I am 19, so that may be an indicator of other problems... I am going to make another thread about it.

[sera300]

I hope you go to college at different colleges, it would be awkward running into each other while out w/another.

If you both are okay with it, both know the rules, nothing wrong with it. Perhaps it will be a good move for you both and ultimately decide what you both want or don't.

Ah, I went back and pulled your other post. Just date other's have fun. This guy dumped you a few times, I'd tell him the topic would be entertained perhaps in 6 months.

Can you really emotionally detach yourself from him to go out and have fun after you wondered if you really considered wanting to marry him? Sometimes a full break from the other allows one to progress with their own life.

[Chino]

I think its very healthy at your age. Especially if you are both going to go away for college. Most HS relationships where people end up at different colleges never make it past Thanksgiving of freshman year. On top of that, many people change significantly while in college. Between all of the new people that you meet and the new experiences you encounter you end up discovering more and more about your own identity.

You both owe it to yourselves to be able to enjoy all aspects of being young. How do ever know if anything is good when you have no basis for comparison? Do you really know that diet coke is your favorite soda if you've never had a diet pepsi? Date as many people as you can to find out what really matters to you and what qualities you would truly want in the person you will spend your life with.

[dancingdoc2]

Please do an Advanced Search using my name and the key words: "what humanity has to offer". You will find several of my posts all pretty much saying the same thing and that is why dating and dating a lot of people is so important to a person's social and intellectual education and overall maturity.

[Invader_Akira]

Whatever you do, don't sleep with him if he's dating other chicks... I as well as everyone else, don't want you to catch something bad b/c I'm sure that it would suck big time to be left with an STD from a relationship that went nowhere...

[Brandye]

The average age of women at first marriage is over 26. What is your hurry?

[EvilEvilKitten]

Date whomever you want - this is your time to learn. Use condoms and bcp's when having sex. Don't take any one man seriously.

As for this fellow you've been with - he's just scared. Let him go.

[Invader_Akira]

I agree EEK, but I can't really say much b/c I only dated 2 guys and I married one of them, but I don't regret it b/c most guys that were in my school were either whores or not my type.

[tmps]

if your fine about not being with him then it sounds like you not meant to be. if he wants to 'date' other people then he may have gotten offers or have feelings for someone else. i think you should be free and enjoy yourself.