threesome-where to start?

[mr flibble]

Hi.
Not sure where to start, really. My fiance and I have been together about six years, and all is well in the bedroom. Being a red-blooded male my fantasy is a threesome with her friend, and I'm not too sure how to make it happen. Here's the (slightly complex) background:

We are both 25 and she has never had anyone other than me. (I had a few teenage 'five-minute-fumbles', but nothing serious) I tend to be the more adventerous one. She went to an all-girl school, and (just my luck) is the only one of her friends to be 100% straight! Her best friend, who I have fancied since I first met, admits to being by, even though she is married (to a guy ten years older than us). He, on the other hand, is by all accounts rather boring between the sheets. Her friend has admitted to us that she needs more 'kink' in her sex life. Infact, she and I have remarkably similar tastes.

They have built a sauna at their house, and we (all four of us) regualrly get naked together for this, and we are all perfectly comfortable with it.

Oh, and just to make this even more complicated, her husband recently caught her cheating on him, and they very nearly split up!

Basicly, I'm pretty sure her friend would be up for it, her husband would probably hate the idea, and my missus refuses to give a straight answer, other than "not now", albeit with a negative tone of voice.

It has often been joked that if such an event occured, myself and her friend would leap on each other, leaving her husband and my fiance staring on in shock!

The question is: how to make it happen? Obviously, from a moral point of view, all four of us would have to agree. I am even willing to make it a foursome (hey- I'm open minded!) But something tells me that's even less likely! My other half has said she feels no atraction whatsoever to her friends husband (fine by me!) Although regarding her friend she says only that it would be wierd - and doesn't say 'no' outright.

So, er.. any advice or opinions would be welcome here. Is it even worth trying, or should I give up hope? I don't want to ruin both relationships.

Thanks,
Mr Flibble

[Brandye]

Start by reading here. There are dozens of threads on threesomes.

[EvilEvilKitten]

Begin by going with your wife to the local swing club/group meetings. There is one - you just have to find it. Just go to meet some people and to chat. Relax - no one's going to pressure you into anything.

Give up on your friends. That is drama you two will not be able to handle as newbies.

Do NOT expect your wife to indulge on girl-on-girl action. She may be fearing this and that might be holding her back. It is NOT required for an FMF threesome; just as you being man-on-man is NOT required for an MFM threesome.

After checking out your local area, go home and discuss this indepth and set any ground rules before you both go hunting together.

[mr flibble]

I see your point about drama, but neither of us like the idea of sex with a stranger. We have talked about it in an extremely hypothetical, "what if" way, and came to the conclusion that if it ever happened, we would rather it was someone we knew.

[EvilEvilKitten]

that's why you go to your local group meets - to get to know people. If your wife's not attracted to the husband, there's no hope. Also the husband doesn't sound particularly open-minded. So give them a miss. The women control the action in the swing world. So your wife has to make contacts with the other swinging wives - do you see? It is worth the effort.