Am I falling out of love?

[Marc]

I've been with my girl for over a year and I'm just not sure if I love her as much as I used to.

Her past had never bothered me but now it's such a hinder on our relationship. I'm trying everything just to forget those problems. I also find myself being more flirtatious around other girls too.

I've had such amazing times with this girl. I've done everything with her. She is my longest and only real relationship ever. All I did before her was go on dates.

Sometimes I really don't care if it's over and other times I know it would suck.

Our spark has gone out too. In the past we could do everything and nothing would hold us back. Now, the slightest problem will stop her.

Granted we are trying to work on these problems, I'm just... I dunno, just not caring as much. This really hurts me to write this but I'm in desperate need of help.

We are very open and talk about everything to each other. I just can't talk about this stuff. If I told her this, she'd lose it. We live an hour apart and it'd be so hard. I'm also very close with her family. (Brother, sister, mom and dad)

Am I falling out of love or is there still hope? If you have any questions for me, that will help the situation, please feel free to ask away. Thank you. Also, please, please no asshole remarks. I need help.

[thetease13]

I don't think you're necessarily falling out of love. You're just following the same path most couples do. After some time, the "spark" just kind of starts to die off. The love is still there but the spark is not.
No relationship can stay the same as it was a year ago. No two people will feel exactly the same towards each other as they did a year ago.

However, that being said, there is nothing wrong with testing the waters.
If it is at all possible, talk to her about perhaps taking a break. Go out and see some other people and if all you can think about is her and all you're doing is comparing other girls to her, then you know just how much you care for her and it's time to go back to her.

[lilly2279]

What problems are you having? Are you arguing? Or are you just becoming disinterested?

[oberon]

I think you are going to have to talk to her about this if you expect it to get any better. *It's something you both need to work on. *You don't have to be rude or confrontational. *Just say something like, "I love you and I want us to be wonderful together, but I think we are losing that "spark". * I don't want to lose you, so what can WE do to get it back?" *

No one (well, that I've met, anyway) is a mindreader. *The only way to fix a problem is to acknowledge that there is a problem. *The quickest way to figure out what the problem is is to talk about it. *

Don't let the problem be something that drives you apart. *Let it be something that you can work on together to bring you closer.

Take care.

[Marc]

Originally Posted by [b

Quote[/b] (oberon @ June 11 2005,23:29)]Just say something like, "I love you and I want us to be wonderful together, but I think we are losing that "spark". I don't want to lose you, so what can WE do to get it back?"

I did confront her about the spark. We talked and tried to fix the problem. She was trying but I just cared less and less.

Trust me, I wanted to care so much more but I just don't for some reason.

I really don't think I'm ready for this kind of long term relationship anyways. She always talks about marriage and what not. I'm really just looking to have fun and take things day by day. (I've told her it would be great if it was just with her, so she knows) The problem is, she wont give 110% into everything unless she knows the person will be with her forever. I know this because I talked to her today about it. After things started getting worse during the talk, she said she would change that. I just couldn't believe it because I know what has happened in the past.

I just cared less and less and fell out of love. We broke up a few hours ago.

[oberon]

Originally Posted by [b

Quote[/b] (Marc @ June 12 2005,14:22)]Trust me, I wanted to care so much more but I just don't for some reason.

I really don't think I'm ready for this kind of long term relationship anyways.

Breakups are always hard... even when it's for the best. *

I think from your comments that it WAS for the best. *It sounds like the two of you are at different places in your life. *She's ready to settle down, and you aren't. *

That's okay. *Neither of you are wrong... just wrong for each other at the moment. *

Good luck to both of you. *Take care.

[Acid_Burn]

ok on this message board there are alot of smart people and they all have usefull information but on this topic i dont think anybody can help you... you need to decide for yourself if you still love this girl nobody here can tell you that your still in love

[c+m14335]

there is till hope for everything in this world, but acid burn is right we cant tell u how u feel u need to figure that out on ur own...but there is still hope just spice it up a lil bit or something be spontaneous, or something

[Jm33]

they broke up in june. u guys don't read the posts made before you? that was like three months ago.

[Acid_Burn]

no i dident sorry to hear that...wow i gotta pay attention more