more problems with my girlfriend

[lakers fan]

I posted earlier that my girlfriend and were having problems, and I said I was gonna break up with her. She said she wanted to make it work and to stay together. I being stupid, gave it another shot. So here is what happened today.

I go pick her up at work to go get some luncg, she decides to eat there with her coworkers on her break, i said fine i'll order something to go. So im sitting there and only a few people are there, so when she walks by i barely tug on her and smile. I then get my food and go home.

I get a call on my cell from her 5 mins later, with her yelling at me saying don't f***ing touch me at work its embarrasing. I hate that your always grabbing and touching me. Then hangs up. I was like woah.

Then she calls back, tells me she's sorry but that maybe we spend too much time together, that she still likes me and stuff but that she wants to hang out with her friends. Thing is she has no friends. I said to her, look at the beginning all you ever wanted to do was see me, I swear she was like almost obsessed with me or something. Then all of a sudden she is tired of me after she moved in with me, and she wants to see me less? I was like i always wanted to hang out with my friends, but since you always wanted to be with me i basically dropped them for her. now she's like i feel trapped.

I don't get her. She wants to live with me, and she wants me to take her to school, but she doesn't want to see me as much? What i don't get is i don't even see her that much. She works all day 4 days a week, goes to school every other day like all day.

The thing is I was being nice and putting up with her stuff. She clips her nails and just leaves them there, leaves all her cloths around, gets gel and toothpaste all over the bathroom, i cook for her, massage her back for her when she gets off work, pay for meals, everything. So for me not seeing her as much is fine because i don't like to do all those things for her if she doesn't appreciate them and I was getting tired of doing these things and especially waking up early everyday to take her to work.

When I tell her this, she say's see this is why i don't want to tell you this. You take it the wrong way and think that i don't love you anymore. I just need more time apart from you, and that your too immature or something. And also last night, she was rubbing dirty socks all over me, and drawing on me with pens. How mature was that? She then also tells me today that she did that to purposely piss me off, so that she won't have to see me as much. I swear she makes me so mad, I don't even know why i gave this relationship another shot.

Im sorry for all this rambling, but i had to get it out.

[petunya]

It's good to get things out.

She has issues and needs therapy/counseling. This is not a question, it is a FACT. Either that or she needs hormone control. Flipping between pure rage at you for touching her and then switching to feeling remorseful immediately after "throws up a red flag" (in the words of my fellow board member ).

Ask her why she says she loves you, but treats you like she hates you.

Tell her to just TELL YOU when she wants time to be alone or with her friends, instead of acting like an ass. Pardon my French.

That is, if you still want to tolerate her insanity.

Best of luck!

[LadyOfLucidDepths]

just stop doing what you do and worry about yourself, keep the little bitch on the line, see what she does.. i bet you any money she will freak out!
seriously, just... either get rid of her, or stop trying to please her and wrry about yourself...
people like this ,make me go insane... they need counselling

[HngLkAMouse]

This may sound cold... but any therapy SHE needs is irrelevant. It is not your responsibility to save the world. You need to do what's right for you in this situation.

Clean break. Walk away. Anything she accuses you of or blames you for... just agree with her. "Yup, you're right... I'm a jerk... Goodbye!"

Close that chapter in your life and start a new one. Trust me... you will write MANY more chapters in the future... no need to stretch this one out.

[demonbuttercup]

Originally Posted by [b

Quote[/b] (lakers fan @ May 14 2005,17:44)]I don't get her. She wants to live with me, and she wants me to take her to school, but she doesn't want to see me as much? What i don't get is i don't even see her that much. She works all day 4 days a week, goes to school every other day like all day.

The thing is I was being nice and putting up with her stuff. She clips her nails and just leaves them there, leaves all her cloths around, gets gel and toothpaste all over the bathroom, i cook for her, massage her back for her when she gets off work, pay for meals, everything. So for me not seeing her as much is fine because i don't like to do all those things for her if she doesn't appreciate them and I was getting tired of doing these things and especially waking up early everyday to take her to work.

I think its the fact she likes a maid, mommy, and chaufeur to take care of her every need.
I mean who wouldn't want someone to do ALL that stuff for them?!?
I agree, just make a clean break. If she wants time apart give her all the time she needs... maybe she'll learn to do shit for herself.
She'll realize what a great guy you were when she actualy has to fend for herself... but then it will be too late.
Don't fall for her crap again, I mean she's SOOO mean to you

[lilly2279]

She's immature and doesn't deserve a guy that is so good to her yet. She probably needs to have a REAL jerk for a boyfriend before she realizes how great you are.

Stop doing things for her, let things cool. If you still want to be with her, she will probably come crawling back. Otherwise, kick her to the curb and find someone who will appreciate how sweet you are.

[HngLkAMouse]

Originally Posted by [b

Quote[/b] (lilly2279 @ May 15 2005,12:09)]She's immature and doesn't deserve a guy that is so good to her yet. *She probably needs to have a REAL jerk for a boyfriend before she realizes how great you are.

Stop doing things for her, let things cool. *If you still want to be with her, she will probably come crawling back. *Otherwise, kick her to the curb and find someone who will appreciate how sweet you are.

By no-means am I debating you... just curious as to what the purpose of "waiting" for her to came around is for...? Those changes are usually temporary surface changes so she can lure him back to her "world"... but she'll be right-back to "who she is" in no time at all.

( Back to addressing original poster )

Again, I may be wrong & harsh... but I say don't even let it cool-off. Make the clean break and move-on. If it REALLY was meant-to-be... you will find a way back to each-other in the future, but gut-instinct tells me that you are both passing-ships in each other's lives. Let her keep sailing.

[lilly2279]

I only said that in case he actually still wants to be with her. *I'm not going to tell someone to dump someone if they are just trying to get advice on how to make things better or asking why she is acting that way. *That's all.

I, myself, wouldn't want to wait until they came around, but everyone is different and I respect that. *

[petunya]

I think you already know that she won't change... she changed for a while and then went right back to her old self, right? Unless I am getting posts confused.

Staying with her is masochism (sp). You're torturing yourself. I'm sorry, but I can't believe anybody that tells me your relationship has love in it. Not from her end.

There are SO many fish in the sea, why are you hanging out at the bottom with that clam?

[lakers fan]

hey thanks for all of your responses. I guess I am just wishing for false hope that things will change, and she will be the girl i first met. And she has had jerks for boyfriends before, her last boyfriend used to beat on her weekly, make her pay for his everyday living expenses, steal money from her, and lose all her money gambling, and sexual things too. I guess I was just a nice guy for too long and she got too used to it.

Petunya I did ask her why she still loved me, you know what she said? she said its because you love me. i said what does that mean? She then responds with well would you love your mother if she didn't love you? I said yes of course. She then later on say's oh you know i love you, your the only peraon I love in this world.

So fast forward this to today which is monday, and she say's we have to have a talk. I was thinking finally, we can talk for once and try and work out some problems. All she say's is you should be nicer to me, and that you should do everything without complaining. And also we will never have sex again unless im horny, and no asking for blowjobs, or handjobs.

I was so wait, our relationship will get better if I do everything you want without complaining, and be your little bitch? yeah this seems fair. I think Im kicking her out.