Miracles in Love-Beating the Odds

[Poetic Skye]

I'm a single girl, who's basically lost hope in finding the right guy for me. I've gone out of my way to try to find happiness, such as making the effort to actually search for a guy I've loved for nine years. Before that I was searching for a guy I accidentally lost touch with and tried everything possible. I always kept a lot of faith in a love miracle because I knew that a miracle was definitely what I needed in those situations. I realized that my love life isn't designed in a way that I could make it happen on my own, regardless of the efforts. Right now I just spend time with a guy who I'm doomed with from the beginning but we enjoy each other's time. For that tiny atomical piece of hope I have left, I'd like to know if anyone here actually found the right person through what seemed to be a phenomenon because it seemed so unlikely to happen, whether it involved unrequitted love in the beginning that worked out or simply finding the person after searching for them for years.

[secretly_shy]

One of my friends had a lot of problems when we were "young" teens (13 onwards) and was still living a pretty mucked up life for most of last year.

In February she started going out with a man shes had strong feeling for for a while... they are to be married in december, she will have just turned 21.

ps- she was single for FIVE YEARS! i think that added to some of her problems, but shes a happy lamb now

[vagabondprince]

why do you say you're doomed from the beginning with this guy you're currently seeing? enjoying your time together with another person is a key building block in a relationship.

if you just concentrate on enjoying what you have, life really does become much more pleasant. besides, i can tell you i found my girlfriend the very day after i truly stopped even looking. I had given up hope and decided single life was just jazzy, and the next day there she was, a sign from the fates that the moment i'm satisfied and pleasant they're gonna stir things up.

[Poetic Skye]

I really don't believe in that "stop looking for love it will find u" because for a long time i had stopped, even right now i have stopped and it's not happening for me. This guy I'm seeing it's really not going anywhere, in fact I'm going to stop seeing him altogether. It doesn't even involve him. I really just want to find if miracles in love exist, for example, your childhood crush going to your college and you guys finally hook up, something like that. Things that seem unlikely to happen.

[vagabondprince]

I know it's not what you're looking for, but i kinda just wanted to clarify a little, and sorry i don't have any miracle story except the girl i've fallen the deepest in love with was the one that came after i stopped looking.

anyway, about what i was saying; i wasn't necessarily trying to say "stop looking for love it'll find u". There is more of a point to taking your concentration off of finding love than just that quote. it has become more and more clear to me the more people i talk to, chat online with and the more posts on boards like this i read that people are leaning on love and relationships way too much for happiness and completeness in their lives. in some book i read it discussed how using another person as a sort of crutch for happiness and fulfillment can end up causing major problems, and by looking at the current divorce rate and all, it is almost obvious. A suggestion that the book made was to find happiness and completeness for your own life, then find another "complete" person that may complement you rather than searching for completeness in another person. that person is probably searching for completeness in you as well, and that creates stress on both people in the relationship.

[Poetic Skye]

Okay, just in case this whole post gets off topic because i've seen it happen before when the viewers focus on the last reply, I'm gonna repeat the topic. I'd like to know if anyone here actually found the right person through what seemed to be a phenomenon because it seemed so unlikely to happen, whether it involved unrequitted love in the beginning that worked out or simply finding the person after searching for them for years.

[lilly2279]

Geeze, the response you are looking for is so streamlined I think it may be a while till you get a reply that exactly fits what you are looking for. Sorry, not extraordinary story of star crossed lovers from me.

[mjv154]

Try and look at life in a more wholistic way. *You seem so focused on finding that one person who will make everything perfect. Asking other people how they found love will NOT help you find it. *

*Miracles are a funny thing you know. *"God helps those who help themselves." ~ Ben Franklin *The guy was very right.

*Look to expand your everyday relationships, friends, family, co-workers. *There is no one person out there that will fill all of your needs, you need an entire army of friends and family to do that.

*The more people you know and get to meet the more potential you have of finding true love. *It is out there if you are willing to work towards it. Don't sit back and wait for a miracle....make one happen.

[Poetic Skye]

Thank you mjv for your words of wisdom. I completely agree with what you're saying. I guess I do sound a little ridiculous trying to find a miracle, but I have attempted to make them happen in the past and I've given up by now. I won't wait for a miracle because I don't feel like one is headed my way regardless, but I figured what's the harm in hearing someone else's story. I have nothing to lose.