Serious problems...

[withthisknife]

where to begin.

Tonight my brother was online and told me my girlfriend wanted to talk to me. So I started and she said she had a bad day and that she had been have anxiety attacks all day. She finally told me what happened.

She was at the mall and ran into her ex-boyfriend. Over Thanksgiving break (we are in college, have been dating for a while), my gf went to a friends house and got drunk. Her friend showed up with her ex-boyfriend. She said she was passed out when they were there so no big deal. Well, the ex today told her that while she was passed out, he had sex with her....

I don't know how to fell or what to think. She's a complete mess now. I'm more than 4 hours away because we are on break from school. She doesn't even know if it really happened or if the guy is being an asshole. I'm pissed, angry, sad, confused. I just want to f***ing scream. I'm shaking horribly. Trying to figure out a way to see her before she breaks down completely.

I can't even feel too mad at her. She was basically raped by a guy she hates and I don't know what to do..

I'm confused. AHHHRE$^# i want to just spaz out.

I feel horrible for her now and don't know how to help her... she's saying she wishes she were dead. just a complete mess....



thanks for listening...

[?wiseman?]

withthisknife, your gf should get to a clinic asap and be checked out. If she was raped, there could still be evidence. If so, she should report it to the authorities immediately. PERIOD

[nodoubt16pb]

hang in there dude
Yes tell her to get help and for her to get tested IMMEDIATLY !!! ... and try not to be really mad at her. These guys were dickheads and you have every reason and right to feel f***ing pissed off... so you are ok!
Also afterwards try to get her to therapy she is going through something that is really really aweful to go through and she may need mental help
I am sorry this happened to her....

[LittleFury]

Try to be there for her, she really needs it. IF you can, really try to see her in person, but be careful about physical contact, it can spook her off. If you see her, hold her, but mostly I would probably say let her come to you for the physical part. SHe should go to the clinic and she should file a report with the police. Also, try to get the guy to addmit that he did it, that could help in court, but make sure not to break any laws then it comes to that. And be strong. Right now you gotta be strong for her, be sensitive but strong. She's falling apart and she needs a strong shoulder. Good luck, and if you want to talk more at anytime, pm me and we'll talk.

[Bewitching]

Through personal experience, i can say i know just how your gf's feeling at this time, as the same thing happened to me. *

It's something that is very hard to forget, whether you remember it actually happening or not. *I was in the same boat as your gf also and didn't remember it happening to me.

First off, Fury has stated strongly and VERY ACCURATELY that your gf needs a very strong shoulder to hold her head high, so showing you how you feel all the time might not be the best. *Don't get me wrong, she needs to know just how you feel, (angry, pissed off), damn right you should!!!! *But dont dwell it in her face. *Let her know ofcourse, but if your feelings get WAY too bad, dont let her see it. * Instead take IMMEDIATE action!

I never realised just how much it affected my whole life in general. *Me, as a person, changed and it was for the worse. *I had uncontrollable mood swings and my depression (which i already had) was almost life threatening and It took the love of my life to make me realise that i needed professional help and that sometimes we can't turn to anyone else but a stranger.

Firstly, i say sought this matter, get your gf to see her doctor ASAP to get tested and get this guy out of her life for good. *If you or your gf are skeptical about reporting him due to personal reasons (dont want to cause more trouble etc.) DONT. *He has caused enough emotional trouble for you and your gf, so you need to take action. *Should it turn out he was lying, you are still entitled to take action due to the emotional state it has put you and your gf in.

Secondly, your gf should talk to a professional psychologist. *There's a difference between councellors and psychologists, and Psychology is best recommended (councellors dont have to be/aren't necessarily trained for this sort of thing). *Hopefully this can be a place where your gf can just let out everything she's feeling inside and have somebody there to understand just how she feels and to help her work around that. *

Good Luck with your outcome, i hope it turns out the best for you and your gf. *

If you need to talk further, please feel free to send me a personal message and i'll do the best that i can to help. *