ok i just started having sex i am over 20
mainly my partner has had a few girls before
and well i am new to this
i have a few worries:
1. we had sex 4 times allready and i still havent has an orgazam
he gave me oral sex and stimulated my clitorix I was on the urger of an orgasim but i just couldnt come?!
2. last night we were foolling around he was a bit tiered that night and he told me to lead the show. since i dont know much i was a bit insecure but i do believe i did a good job . mainly he was getting hard and then while i was giving him oral sex his hard on instead of getting harder just kinda of left :confused: :mad: :eek: It kind of killed my mood!
I just gave up after a few mins nothing was happening!
other 3 times he was fine. the night before we had sex 2 times he once and then the second time we fooled around he was trying to make me come but i just couldnt mainly i think he didnt have a hard on or he lost it!
I am getting worried
why s this happening am i not turning him on?
am i not doing something right?
does he have an erection problem?
I need some feed back
one of my girl friends said that sometimes it is commin that at the beging of the relationship that this happens to guys when they are nervous?
So far in life i had had a man lose his erection so this is really killing my sex mood MEGA!!!!
Please start here---This is a quote from another thread from Dancing Doc;
"Several of us have given a lot of our time to providing information on a variety of common albeit important concerns. These are presented in "Sticky" posts that remain at the top of many forums. The Index gives direct access. These Sticky messages were written so that we do not have to write, re-write, and re-re-write answers each time a person writes for info."
The Anatomy of the Female "O", Answered by Brandye & Dancingdoc2 & Inspired by Godiva
For Women Only- Help! Why Can't He Make Me Orgasm?
Female Sexual Response
How Do I Get Him/Her to Orgasm From a Hand/Blow Job?
Hopefully you find some info here insightful.
Dont stress about him going soft. He was tired...I remember I was exhausted from work one day, my girlfriend and I started to fool around and I was hard, but I was so tired it was hard to concentrate and it went soft. This wasnt the fault of my girlfriend, just me trying to push myself too far.
Howdy, and welcome to the SI101 Board and its Forums.
In addition to the links Sera has recommended, let me ask a question and provide the following information:
[quote] 1. we had sex 4 times allready and i still havent has an orgazam
he gave me oral sex and stimulated my clitorix I was on the urger of an orgasim but i just couldnt come?! ...the second time we fooled around he was trying to make me come but i just couldnt mainly i think he didnt have a hard on or he lost it! [/quote]
Do you masturbate and if so can you regularly and consistently achieve an orgasm?
If yes, then you should help him learn how to mimic your technique that is unique and specific to you.
The female orgasm tends to be somewhat elusive at times. It also takes some time to build and to trigger. If you believe at any time that the pending orgasm is still possible yet he is having difficulty helping trigger it, then guide his fingers.
Very few positions position our bodies in a manner that produces constant and ongoing friction; therefore, what a knowledgeable and skilled lover will do is to reach around and finger the clitoris while stroking.
[quote] 2. last night we were foolling around he was a bit tiered that night and he told me to lead the show. since i dont know much i was a bit insecure but i do believe i did a good job . mainly he was getting hard and then while i was giving him oral sex his hard on instead of getting harder just kinda of left It kind of killed my mood! [/quote]
There is no reason why the mood needs to die. Here is the rest of the story: Fall back and begin to kiss and caress (make out), again. This has two benefits, it will rekindle arousal, and, it will extend the love making session.
[quote] one of my girl friends said that sometimes it is commin that at the beging of the relationship that this happens to guys when they are nervous? [/quote]
Your friend is correct as far as she went. The cure quite literally is for him to stop worrying--easier said than done, perhaps, yet this is the answer.
The loss of an erection can happen to any guy any time at any age. Stuff happens and it is no one's fault. The cause can be physiological, or simply a matter of loosing focus. Whatever the cause, don't give up; instead, keep going as noted, above. If it is a matter of his mind wandering, then try shaking things up a bit in order to get his attention, titillate his hot spots, etc., in order to get him mentally on track again.
So, he looses an erection. It will return if you continue onward and upward so to speak and do not quit just because he lost it and it won't grow again as quickly as you might wish. It will, although, not necessarily through direct stimulation. It is because of this that I recommend going back to the basics and continuing to fool around.
How long did it take to learn to ride a bike? Sex is much more complicated. Read around; learn about your body. Until you can bring yourself off, do not expect someone else to. You are responsible for your own development.
How long have you been using English? There is a Spellcheck function. Please use it.
Sex begins in the mind. Why did you wait so long to begin? Did you not participate in sex education in school?
Sera, Dancing Doc and Brandye are all correct. In addition, I would recommend making sure he is properly hydrated before engaging in sex and for you to leave your inhibitions and insecurities behind you and these will slow your learning process.
This is an important part of your life - please become more aggressive at seeking knowledge.