Go for it K.D.! give the girl ur best lovin'!

In Western societies, virginity seems to be more a state of being rather than a physical condition as it is in some Middle Eastern societies. In other words, in the West, women tend to be physically more active and sports among other things can erode the hymen or completely open it. Regardless of whether it is intact or not, the common consensus is that if a woman has not experienced intercourse then she remains a virgin.

Now, to extrapolate this to a same-sex partnership, I would say that she would loose her virginity when penetrated by finger(s), and/or a dildo or other toy (strap-on penis??) that is used during a loving and sexual act.

I don't think there is a right or wrong answer to this. It just depends on your definition of virginity. If your definition is penis in vagina sex, then the answer is no, obviously. By that definition, there would also be a lot of gay men who could be called virgins because their penis has not entered a vagina, even if they have had anal sex.

I think we tend to get too hung up on labels and definitions. It really doesn't matter.

Hmm, didn't choose my words too well there with my definition of virginity. But I think you know what I mean.

[COLOR="DarkRed">You were fine there, cyclefreak. It made sense.

As far as my opinion, I have always felt that it's all in how you feel. If you do something sexual (not necessarily penetration of any kind), and you feel that you are not a virgin anymore, then there's your answer.

To me, there are different virginities that can be taken away. For instance, I am no longer a straight-sex virgin. Nor am I an anal virgin. However, I am a lesbian virgin, as I have not had any true lesbian experiences that I count (not just drunken college-girl stuff).

To each their own.[/COLOR]

Yes, I'd say that virginity is really a state of mind, more than anything else.

I'm going to make a small (?) confession here.

I actually lost my virginity (definition: had penis-in-vagina sex with a woman) quite late. (I won't say how old I was, but let's just say I was a mature age student.) I think I'd developed a bit of a complex about my virginity over the years. I was desperate to 'do it', but could never actually seem to make it happen. The furthest I had ever got with a woman for a long time was hugs and kisses. However, there had been quite a lot of that, and I had become quite practiced at kissing, even receiving compliments from women on my technique.

Nevertheless, I still had this 'thing' about being a virgin, and always thought that my inexperience would be obvious to any woman I managed to have sex with.

When I did finally lose my virginity, guess what I discovered? I wasn't as inexperienced as I thought I was. I found that my experience at kissing was invaluable when it came to sex, and I was able to view the sex act as a natural extension of what I had already been doing.

Now how's that for a true confession!