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Kivin Method

I have search long and hard for this method and I'm having difficulty understanding how i'd actually do it to please my wife. Can someone please explain...

BTW this forum is spectacular!

I never realized that there was a special name for what many of us discover on our own. Essentially, the method seems to be built around massaging the perineum while performing cunnilingus. The stuff I found talks about laying at angles, which is fine, but what makes the difference is placing the flat of your thumb or finger against the flat area between her vaginal and anal openings and pressing rhythmically while kissing her genitals - especially with the tongue on the clitoris.

What is happening is the pressure on the perineum is getting the rectal (or anal) sphincter muscles stimulated. They are the strongest muscles involved in female orgasms and really heighten the pleasure. For women who do not wish anal play, this gets those muscles involved without violating the limits she may otherwise place. Eventually, this may turn into anal play along with oral stimulation.

Whatever other elements may be in the position, I really appreciate this being done for me.

So would you do this say more in the middle of cunnilingus? For instance, say I start out teasing with kisses and sucking around her genital area then I start cunnilingus on her vagina and clit. After that mix in this method before moving on to gspot stimulation. Continued oral of course. Seem right or should there be a different setup/order to things?

There is no set order of things but I'd say cunnilingus, then Kivin with cunnlingus, then Cunnilingus with manual G-Spot, myself - seems a natural progression.

The KIVIN Method

explained and demonstrated on YouTube.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fceA0k3E3bM

365 Days of Sensational Sex

Man oh man... this ol' man is gonna have some F U N this weekend!

I hope this helps clarify this apparently magical technique.

How about some feedback from those who try this?

It seems to me that the Kivin method in the youtube clip, thanks Dancindoc, utilizes a few things that really help get it going.

Many people skimp on foreplay, and can make things more difficult. Personally, I try to keep away from direct clit contact as long as possible to build up more anticipation. I focus on all all of the areas around it, with an occasional flick, but I usually go in a closing in pattern. This maintains a constant, slowly building stimulation. I move maintaining touch so the rhythm isn't interrupted and things blend together, no surprising stop and go. My current partner has difficultly letting go, and this greatly helped. The Kivin does this as well, helping increase arousal like foreplay, but letting you get to it faster for those who simply can't wait to dive in there(or have done to them).

As for bluetides question, I'd do this at the start. I've never met a girl who wanted you to turn it down in the middle or near the end and go away from her clit. Starting slower and building up however........

I prefer to do something very similar to this but use my tongue and go up and down/left and right in the same area as the girl in the video instead of a finger, while having a finger massaging the entrance to her vagina. Sometimes I'll massage around her anus as well or by itself. I increase pressur e or slide my finger across the most sensitive part of her anus everytime I get very close to or touch her clit so the strong sensations all hit at once and blend together. This is especially important if she's never had anyone touch her down there so she won't be uncomfortable.

Side bonus: she now loves it when I play with her anus as well, and she asked me to start doing more without me ever bringing it up. While doing this one time with her straddling my face she reached back, held my hand where it was then lowered herself so I was inside her. Great way to introduce anal play.

Alright, well, the video explains it well, but I'm a little confused. When do you actually put pressure on the perineum?

Also, Brandye said to "press rhythmically" whereas the woman on the film made it sound like you just put constant pressure on it. Do both work or does one work better than the other?

Lastly, do you make contact with the clitoris just before or during the orgasm?

I believe what Brandye meant with the rhythmic pressures was to do it at the same time the girl contracts. For the Kivin method you'd probably move to put pressure on the perineum after a couple minutes, gaging on your woman's arousal and reactions. There's really no set time, it's more a matter of reading your woman.

You'd probably want constant pressure, and increasing this pressure each time you feel a contraction.

This is just my personal experience from what girls preferred me to do, and what feels good when my own is going down on me while putting pressure on the same area.

As for when to start on the clit, here are some signs I've found:
Her hips begin bucking, trying to move you onto it
Hands have been randomly grasping the sheets/general writhing around for a couple minutes
Body quivers
vag/anus clenching and holding

I can tell a climax from normal ecstasy, but my question wasn't when the climax was. Is the best time to actually bring the clit into play just before or during the climax itself? Does it fuel the orgasm or cause it?

Thank you for the response to my other questions. I'll definitely be trying this out.:D

Sorry for not clarifying-- the girls I've been with do those things PRIOR to orgasms, and that's when I know to go more direct or turn it up if I'm already there. I'm sure some can finish without direct contact, but the girls I've been with will stay just prior to an orgasm until something direct.

If she's already had an orgasm or few, then it'd probably make it much easier for her to orgasm from the indirect flicking, and then going right on as she's orgasming could really make it huge.

Ah, okay. Girls are different, I guess. With me it's always been like boiling water. No matter what temperature, it'll boil eventually as long as there's some heat ;). Thanks.

You seem to be looking for a manual with step 1 - kiss through step 342 - avoid the wetspot. Just do it and learn. There is no roadmap to ecstasy.

I'd like to point out that this sort of thing works on men as well especially if you use a vibe.

Oww...it hurts when someone presses there for me. :(

.... but is wonderful for me. Forget the Manual on Pleasing Women!

I say heck with the textbook and do what comes naturally.....and maybe a few things that don't....:)

I've looked around online to learn about the kivin method and found that it's also referred to as the Tahitian method of oral sex. There seems to be slightly more info out there if you use that as a search term.

Just think: thirty years at it and never knew it had a name!

[quote=Brandye;206182]Just think: thirty years at it and never knew it had a name![/quote]Imagine that...so get the rights to name a method after yourself! It will be no new new but you can have a royalty off it!

Wait... There is a manual for pleasing women? Since when, i've yet to meet a woman that likes exactly close to the next.

Yes there is Yari - I wrote it. It is at www.lulu.com and it is entitled Superb Sex.
You're welcome.

If I had money I would buy it. Rough times...but they're made better by this new method ;)...

Ok been reading a little about this and I have some questions for those that have performed it effectively and have some feedback about it. First there is either the licking back and forth across the clitoral hood or just under the actual clit. Which stimulates better? Second, in some areas they suggested that the finger that goes in between the vagina and anus is more of a gauge to feel the orgasmic contractions rather then it adding any stimulus to her. Is this true or does the pressure add to making this method more effective? Third, should there be just a constant pace that can start slow and increase or can you mix it up slightly with different tempos in a teasing situation?
Thx in advance to any answers. I'm eager to try this, but dont want to be slacking in it since I been informed I'm rather good at what I am already doing. Imagine the surprise though if I bust this out and it creates a great one :).

[QUOTE=EvilEvilKitten;206281]Yes there is Yari - I wrote it. It is at www.lulu.com and it is entitled Superb Sex.
You're welcome.[/QUOTE]

Haha fair enough

> First there is either the licking back and forth across the clitoral hood or just under the actual clit. Which stimulates better?

From what I've read, under the clitoris is better, which is one reason you expose it by retracting the hood beforehand.

> Which stimulates better?

Try both and see how she reacts and you will have your answer. Each person is different. Each time is different.

> Second, in some areas they suggested that the finger that goes in between the vagina and anus is more of a gauge to feel the orgasmic contractions rather then it adding any stimulus to her. Is this true or does the pressure add to making this method more effective?

The pressure brings the sphincters into play as Brandye stated, above.
I've tried both applying pressure without moving, and, slight pressure while massaging the perineum. The massage seems to provide a more intense response.

> Third, should there be just a constant pace that can start slow and increase or can you mix it up slightly with different tempos in a teasing situation?

Go slow, later increase the tempo. Take your cue from her reactions and respond accordingly. There is no one right or recommended way. Again, each person is different. Each time is different.

> I'm eager to try this, but dont want to be slacking in it

And how did you get good at what you are already doing? Practice, right? Don't be so critical or hard on yourself. This is supposed to be fun. You two should work together as a team and explore and learn. Whatever you do, she will no doubt like it. If it doesn't work out quite as planned, then learn from her how you might improve your technique. Did you watch the video and listen to the narration? It doesn't sound like it.

[QUOTE=MissHotPants;206150]I've looked around online to learn about the kivin method and found that it's also referred to as the Tahitian method of oral sex. There seems to be slightly more info out there if you use that as a search term.[/QUOTE]

http://adult.worldwideweb.ws/index.php?id=123

[quote=bluetide76] First there is either the licking back and forth across the clitoral hood or just under the actual clit. Which stimulates better? [/quote]

Considering that the clitoris is similar in structure to the penis albeit in miniature, the bottom surface would seem to be more sensitive just like it is for the guy. The ridge of skin known as the Frenulum is thee most sensitive spot on the penis.

I've read conflicting reports on the number of nerve endings in the clitoris. It has been stated that there are the same number in both, and because the tip of the clitoris is so much smaller than the glans of the penis, those nerves are packed much closer together, thus making the clitoris vastly more sensitive. Another report states that there are twice the number of nerves in the tip of the clitoris. I do not know which is correct, yet does it really matter given the response women have to being touched there?

Begin using the recommended technique given in the video. Stroke the tongue against the bottom surface, slowly in the beginning and speeding up as her ardor builds. When the climax is about to happen, switch the tongue work directly on tip. Later, if you find that another approach works better for her, then use that.

Thanks for all the info, I did watch the movie, but when I read more on searching other sites they had differing variations of the technique. My g/f loves clit stimulation so this should be a really good one, I'll practice it and get it adjusted to her best liking. Not sure but also thinking about a mix of this with gspot stimulation. Maying with two fingers on right hand doing the "come hither" on her gspot while using the pinky for the contraction stimulation. Rest would be the kivin method mixed in. hmm so much to explore :D

And all of it splendid fun, bluetide!

hm thanks doc that was interesting actually the point they made I had already noticed, the only 2 times I was able to stimulate her to orgasm it was actually by switching to side to side movements at the right moment as oposed to up and down

[QUOTE=bluetide76;206734]Not sure but also thinking about a mix of this with gspot stimulation. Maying with two fingers on right hand doing the "come hither" on her gspot while using the pinky for the contraction stimulation. Rest would be the kivin method mixed in. hmm so much to explore :D[/QUOTE]

Best thing I've found to date is that he hits the G with one finger, uses other fingertips on the perenium and his thumb on the clit, all three at once. All I can say is OMG. Can you say Earth-shattering. Now all I have to do is build the stamina for it (LOL)-it's almost TOO good and I have to stop him.

[QUOTE=latebloomer;211463]Best thing I've found to date is that he hits the G with one finger, uses other fingertips on the perenium and his thumb on the clit, all three at once. All I can say is OMG. Can you say Earth-shattering. Now all I have to do is build the stamina for it (LOL)-it's almost TOO good and I have to stop him.[/QUOTE]

I'll have to give these things a try tonite. Thanks everyone.:D

If you can predictably tell the difference between ecstasy and orgasm, you are the only man in the world who has learned that. I often cannot even tell in myself. And, by the way, what "normal" ecstasy?

It is generally accepted in the medical world that clitoral stimulation is the center of sexual arousal and the stimulator of orgasm. The pressure on the perineum, vulva, rectal sphincters and others brings more muscles into play when the orgasm lets loose.

I'm going to have to try this this weekend. I never knew it had a name, but can attest to it really being a great stimulation to her when I have done this. For us, she really needs play with her vulva, gentle stoking of her labia, some light touching of her clitoris, and then some nice tongue action on it. Eventually I end up licking her from her perenium up to her clitoris hood. Then some strong attention to the clitoris and continued finger play below. she likes the feel of my finger in her and continued pressure with another finger on her perenium. Usually gets her totally off by this time. This has lead to some anal play with her because she wants some pressure inside and on the perenium.

I have a slight variation that works well on my partner. never heard of Kivin method when I tried this but worked out well.

Whilst I am licking the clitoris I place my thumb on the vaginal opening and slowly push downwards with slight pressure towards the anus (the juices from here lubricate the area and makes it very easy to sldie down). As things progress I apply more and more pressure always stopping at the anus. She always had a good orgasm.

Did this serveral times whenever we were at foreplay, until she surprised me and asked me to psuh the thumb into her anus. Turned me on!!! Now evertime I perform cunnilingus on her she wants the same and always asks for it in her anus when she's about to orgasm. i guess it is so pleasurable she started to consider trying anal sex. She makes it sound so fantastic I came to these forums as my interest in the P-spot has been aroused. I am wondering if i can acheive the heightened sensations she has?

I think this variation is good for couples who want to try anal sex but are unsure as yet.

the conversation is getting informative....i have learned so much...i wanna
give it a try later this evening..... as for me...am giving him all the tips I've acquired here
as to educate him more in pleasing me....

I found that the sideways movement is also good for fingering (gently mind you) as you rub her clit over the bone thats the only way i get my girl to orgasm just up and down don't do much

Speaking of anal play. Two nights ago we had a rabbit vibrator in her after much foreplay, breast play, cunnin., fingering ect., she was very turned on but couldn't get all the way there. I started massaging her anus while the vibrator was rotating in her vagina and she started to go nuts as I placed a finger in the anus and pushed back toward the rotating vib in the vagina. I could feel her anus contracting and she had an awsome orgasm. The rhythmic pressure placed between my finger and the rotating vib just sent her. It was an awsome experience and appeared to really soften her up to anal play.

The way I do it. (Squirrel variation)

As Brandye pointed out, many of us have "discovered" this technique on our own.

The way I do it is a little different than as explained in the various blogs/websites.

I start off in "regular" cunnilingus position : lady on her back, gentleman's head between her legs not at a 90 degree angle. I then use the back of my index, middle and ring finger to massage the lower part of her vulva and her perineum (my fingers never go inside her vagina). To give you an idea, the part my middle finger's middle segment that is just above the middle knuckle applies pressure on the perineum*. (for the visual folks out there, I look like I'm yawning, with my fingers covering my chin instead of my mouth. My hand is not flat over my chin, just the 3 fingers .. looks a little like this http://dedalvs.free.fr/images/slipa/handshape/m.gif )

By massaging, I mean small circle motions. I don't do crazy movements. It's just about putting the right amount of pressure on the perineum and rubbing her labia at the same time.

What I like about this variation is that the little circling motion of the fingers spreads the lady's natural lubricant and gentleman's saliva a lil everywhere and inevitably on the perineum as well. This facilitates the massaging of the perineum (and permits a greater circling motion). The rubbing-pressure combo certainly has an edge vs. pressuring of the perineum alone.

On another note, this variation works best for me because I don't have to be at 90 degrees with my g/f's body. Gives me a better position for cunnilingus.

*(sorry for the repeating uses of "middle", it's the semantics http://www.humanhand.com/humanhand.html )

SQ

PS: Those of you who'll try this and get tempted with anal play in the process, remember the simple rules of hygene. Your fingers should not go from the anus area and then in your woman's vagina.

Have fun

well for me it was nicely explained in that you-tube video :)
but ah am kinda smart ,get things quickly :D
lol jks jks

Is there an updated link for the video mentioned in this thread? The link provided no longer works.

Not that I have found. I am going to redo the opening article in a few days using 10,000 instead of a picture. Please stand by....

sorry but the video on youtube has been deleted and i tryed looking for pics unsuccesfully. I tryed to imagine how should i stay but i really cannot figure it out(maybe being not english i cannot understand perfectly). I try to explain my doubt with the positions in the site:
http://www.sexinfo101.com/earmuffs.shtml
should i stay like this but with her laying on her back? in this way the leg isn't in my way hampering me? i understood that i have to stimulate perineum while doing cunnilingus but how can i do it confortably?

thanks for your help and continue your great job with this site

Hmmmm

Seems to me that you could do this in the Forbidden Fruit position with your nose like I do. While performing oral in this position my nose is pressing and rubbing all around the perineum and anus. Very intoxicating! She has tremendous climaxes and is totally spent after a few.

isnt that a part of what sex is about, its almost too good, and you have to stop him, but what about being 'taken' over the edge, ( ie: no slowing me down ), does it seem like some of us are afraid we are going to offend someone by taking what has been obviously offerred?

Tried this the other night, but I don't think my wife was all that into it. Suspect I was not quite on the money (so to speak!).

More practice required I guess.

Wow, now I know the name for it..lol