My boyfriend and I are in a pretty serious relationship and we started having sex about a month ago. We have done it five or six times and he orgasmed all but the first two, but I have never experienced one during sex or from foreplay. The last time we had sex he felt really down after realizing he still hadn't gotten me to climax, even though it's really not that important to me. He's said that he's not good enough and that he failed me even though I've told him I love him for him and things like that. I wanted to know if anyone could tell me some good positions we could try that might increase the likelihood of me having an orgasm, or just things I could tell him to make him feel better.
Sun, 02/19/2006 - 02:53
#1
I've never had an orgasm and he feels bad
During foreplay, grab his hand and show him how you masturbate and bring yourselve to climax (this is if you masturbate). Literally make him mimic the moves you do and if you can bring yoursleve to one, then this way should be able to make him bring you.
As during sex...not many people have orgasms (or so I'm told) during the actual act (I know I don't...I don't even have them during foreplay lol) but the most common position I've heard to help a woman orgasm during sex is missionary: guy over girl because apparently it stimulates the clit at the same time...or even better. Doggie style, that way he can be doing his thing, and you an please yourselve.
In the beginning my guy couldn't give me one (Hell, I can't give myself one). Just let him know you love him and that you having an orgasm isn't the end of the world...as long as you know he's happy, you're happy.
Please read the following that I just posted on another thread.
http://www.sexinfo101.com/forum/other_sex_topics/16505-male_female_genit...
It is your orgasm, not his. Too many men assume responsibility for that for which they have no control. That includes our orgasms. If he does not accept that, he has control issues that will cause other problems.
Most importantly, do not get yourself in a twist. You do not mention whether or not you masturbate. That is the best training ground.
[QUOTE=Hex-258]My boyfriend and I are in a pretty serious relationship and we started having sex about a month ago. We have done it five or six times and he orgasmed all but the first two, but I have never experienced one during sex or from foreplay. The last time we had sex he felt really down after realizing he still hadn't gotten me to climax, even though it's really not that important to me. He's said that he's not good enough and that he failed me even though I've told him I love him for him and things like that. I wanted to know if anyone could tell me some good positions we could try that might increase the likelihood of me having an orgasm, or just things I could tell him to make him feel better.[/QUOTE]
Tell him not to worry so much about it. Me and my guy have had sex 20 times and he is yet to make me come - I can get myself off but he wants to do all the work....
If your orgasm really doesn't mean much to you because you want him to have a good time (which is how I feel on the subject) tell him that.... tell him that you love him and that your orgasm will come in time when you both know what you like.
Again I can say I know what you are going though. My boyfriend used to feel bad for not making me come at the beginning. You are wise for being supportive because the more guilty he feels the less likely he is to make you come. Last thing you want is to make your love-making into "have you come?" race. Sex is about enjoying one another and not about coming as such... I personally enjoy every stroke my boyfriend gives me for as long as we can go at it, and that matters more to me then coming. Trust me when the time is right you'll come just make sure to tell him that ;)