I've just got into a new relationship, my previous one was long distance and i had sex a few times every few months, this hurt almost every single time, like im being torn open, it doesnt matter how gentle or hard im being entered.
but for the past few weeks ive had a new man, and im having regular sex, and it still hurts every time! its only at first, mabye for the first 5 minutes, but it is difficlt for him to enter me at first, because 1) im in pain and 2) its a little tight for him. and after sex i still feel stung at the bottom of my slit, it prevents me from having sex anymore for the next couple of days because it jsut feels too uncomfortable.
More annoyingly, i don't actualy feel ANY sexual pleasure from intercourse throughout, unless he brushes up against my clit, which can be difficult at times, i think this because of the pain i go through at first.
I've been tot he doctors about the pain ( not about not feeling anything), and I've had a smear test and such, and im in the clear.
Does anyone have any idea whats going on, and how i can stop it?
You aren't relaxing. Your G-Spot has not been found and stimulated. You may need a more more skilled and experienced male.
but i dont wanna 'nother boyfriend!!i just got this one! cant trade it in for a new one jsut cause he cant find it lol.
And i tried beign relaxed...okay i tried beign drunk, didnt really work :( still hurt. its all onthe outside though, the inside is fine if he doesnt try to go in at side angles...ow.
yea ok relax just remember that in evilevilkittens mind all males must be perfect or out, trying to resolve the situation together apparently is not an option, and feeling of love and affection are nonsense just tick off how many orgasms he can give you and then compare with the rest and choose the best male !
ok now seriously perhaps relaxing would help and more foreplay if you think it is just him kiss you then jam it in well it takes a bit longer than that to warm a woman up (well I don't know about evilevilkitten).
I have the same problem I am resonably new to sex but I cant do it as it still hurts. I am totally comfortable with my boyfriend and he seems to really enjoy it which is great but is there anything I can do for it to be more comforatbke for me? I really want to start enjoying sex ad he just feels guilty. We do have a lot of foreplay before hand as it helps. I am also on the depo and my friend says condoms hurt well thats all I have to say help is sooo appreicaited though
Are you wet enough?? Just because you have a lot of foreplay doesn't mean every woman produces enough natural lube... might have to try some ky or astroglide..etc.
Condoms, lubricant and not thinking ahead of time "I hope this doesn't hurt" will all help. You may be tensing up without realizing it. Instead, think "This man will please me." Keep the lubricant in case re-application is necessary. And instead of having him go in deep, have him caress your G-Spot with the head of his penis. All of which should definitely improve your coital experience.
The only thing I can think is both of you are relatively new to sex, not a bad thing; however, the problem may be your partners technique. I have found many men don't really know how to "read" a woman, and go in for the "kill". Meaning many enjoy all the angles, deep pentration, and rapid thrusting, this is all fine if the female partner has some experience and knows how to make it work for her.
First your going to have to work on the high level of stimulation prior to intercourse. You should be so aroused that you are dripping wet (not trying to make this sound nasty), when he is doing oral have him stetch you inserting fingers. When you are wet enough that you have began to soak the sheets, have him penetrate you missonary. Start with not putting your legs high up. Bend them only like you do at your Gyn exam, don't wrap them around him. Have him insert himself very carefully, not too deep, gently inside you a bit and pulling back (not all the way out), inserting back to the same spot, and keep the rythym slow, very slow. As it feels better, have him go a bit deeper but keep it slow. Don't have him ride up on you too far yet, just keep it going in & out farily straight. You should be trying to find where your legs feel best, try tilting your pelvis down while he is in you, try putting your legs out straight, try back to the knee bent only and try opening legs farther apart and bringing them back in; meanwhile, have him keep it slow an steady. You move to see what feels good, try tightening your pelvic muscles around him and another thing tighten your lower abdominal muscles, and lift up your upper back a bit (almost like a very slight abd crunch), this changes your pelvic position. Keep lube around, don't be afraid to stop for a bit and go back to oral and manual stimulation & kissing. During this whole time, have him keep it slow, have him minimize grinding, see how YOU can get yourself to feel him so he feels good to you during intercourse. You do all the moving this time and ask him to change speeds if you need. Once you figure this out (what does it for you), then you can apply it to all other positions and speeds...
[QUOTE=EvilEvilKitten;164111]You aren't relaxing. Your G-Spot has not been found and stimulated. You may need a more more skilled and experienced male.[/QUOTE]
Better yet just go out and buy yourself a machine.
(sarcasm)
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ok so what part was the sarcasm ?