hi...
well I have tried penetration before and obviously the first time hurt and i dealt with it because I thought i was going to get better. After a while i had to stop because it was hurting. After that I stayed really sore. But then when we tried it again (a completely different day) it hurt again...i thought it was because we had had weeks without doing it. But by now we have tried it at least 8 times and all of them hurt alot!, and I never feel pleasure, it only hurts.
I know that we dont do it that often so my vagina closes but shouldnt my muscles be open already...? what can i do so it wont hurt anymore?
Several possible reasons:
1. You are not lubricating. You aren't aroused.
2. He's very bad at it.
So now that you expect sex to be painful, I am sure that you are all tense. So step one is to relax- deliberately relax. Think "this man will please me".
Next, foreplay - lots of kissing, cunnilingus, caressing, nibbling, licking - take your time with this! He should be exploring your body varying the pressure as he goes along to find out just what pleases your body. Learning to 'listen to her body' is a necessary skill for every man.
Next, erotic massages work very well to help both relax and arouse.
Next, KY or other vaginal lubricant, generously applied.
Does he know what he is doing? Is he not in the vagina? Is he a poor fit? Too big, too long, too thick for you? Is he slamming into your cervix instead of sliding under your cervix? If so, slow down and correct your angle. Never go above the cervix.
If none of this helps, seek medical assistance as sex should NOT hurt.