I lost my virginity a few days ago and I'm kind of freaking out because I'm not sure he used protection. It all happened really fast and I don't remember him putting one on. and since I'm near sighted and I wasn't wearing my glasses I couldn't see it on him so of course I'm freaking out. And I can't ask him because he hasnt really spoken to me in days. I feel like an idiot. the sex wasnt bad but the emotional part was pretty painful. and now im freaking because the last thing i need is to be pregnant. Wouldn't I have felt it if he used a condom? and i know the first night we were together he didnt because I jerked him off in my hand and I didnt feel one. and he had tried to get inside me that night but we had no lube so he had difficulties but the last time we were together there were no problems. he pulled out right away when he came and it kind of looked to me like he came on the bed. so thats it. im just a little freaked and needed to talk about it.
Thu, 05/12/2005 - 17:11
#1
I'm 31 and I just lost my virginity......
I went to my regular doctor and she did both a blood and urine pregnancy test and they were negative. But she told me to go to my gynecologist to determine why my cycle is so off. its still really light and somewhat irregular. I still haven't gone to the gyno because my insurance recently changed and it doesn't cover a regular gynecological exam. I couldn't believe that when I read it. My new primary doctor can give me one however since my 500.00 deductible isn't paid I'd have to pay the full amount. So it looks like I'll be going to planned parenthood I guess. I need to get an hiv test too. just for precautionary measures the doc says to get one three months after unprotected intercourse. But otherwise im okay. I told the guy who got me in this situation i wasn't pregnant via text messaging just so he would know. all he said was thank god. havent really talked to him since. I did however meet the girl he was seeing after me. strange I know. lol. turns out he was whining to her about using a condom. he didnt want to. but unlike me since she was more aware of what was going on she made him. anyway he pulled the same crap with her. just stopped talking to her. But she got out of it okay. says she owes that partly to me. Now she has a new bf who treats her right. I'm still not dating yet. my ability to trust isnt still fully there yet.
Any update pixie?
Unfortunatly sounds to me like you got used and abused, A girl shouldn't have to worry about things like this, no matter what age group they are.
A girl should be interactive and comprehensive with there partner he shouldn't run away like that. It sounds to me like he used you for sex, RUNNING off.
But hope its all good now
But your first time shouldn't of been like that.
Might be worth going to your doctor to check that you've not picked up anything else off this guy. Last thing you want is an STI. Anyway, hope all goes well.
Regards,
Steve
yeah I intend to get all of that checked out too. I asked him if there was anything along those lines I should be concerned about but he was too freaked out about the whole pregnancy thing to even discuss it. I haven't spoken to him since I brought up the pregnancy subject to him. I got overly dramatic due to my anxiousness. he told me to calm down and to stop bringing up the pregnancy stuff. so I told him I'd leave him alone til I had a reason to talk to him. its unlikely that I'm pregnant since I counted the days and we were together five days before I even would have ovulated. but only having all the right tests will really put my mind at ease.
Well...sounds like he was an absolute creep....i'm sorry for your situation, and i'm not going to "pile on" with any chastizing of your poor judgement.
Hopefully u didn't get pregnant, and YES i would go to the drugstore and buy and OTC test first. Next i would get BACK on the phone with that - and i use this term very loosely - "gentleman" and pass some of the stress on to him by saying: "Hi, well, since you won't tell me if u wore a condom, and i WAS a virgin..if i AM pregnant i expect you to fulfill your responsibilities"
No matter what decision you make in regards to a potential pregnancy, he should NOT get off scott free from the stress as well as the overall responsibility that accompanies unprotected sex!
Do you have friends and family who can be a support structure to you? It's important to have friends/famly with you right now - even if u end up not being pregnant!
So I finally got him to talk to me and he didnt use protection and says he knows it was stupid. of course he wasn't the only one. I was irresponsible too. but yeah i'm gonna get an otc pregnancy test and take it when the instructions say to. but thanks for not chastizing me. any consequences I'm gonna have to reap are punishment enough. and i do have a great support system. my four closest friends, my brother, my sister, my mom, and my stepdad are there for me every step of the way.
The 29th. And I asked him about whether or not he used protection and he won't answer me. Silence speaks volumes. To me if he won't tell me he did then he didn't. I feel soo stupid.
Im sorry pixie
I hope everything works out ok
keep us up to date.
When is your next cycle supposed to start?
I know now the OTC pregnancy tests say they can detect it like a week before you are supposed to start.
Believe me I know now that I need to be responsible and speak up. Wish i would have before. And I do plan on going to the gyno. but I know at this point they won't be able to tell me anything til I'm within at least 4 days of my next cycle or possibly til after I miss a period if that happens of course.
Sorry to hear about your situation.
I would say yea you can tell the difference but if you've never had sex before then you wouldn't really have a comparison.. ya know?
I would've suggested maybe going and getting the morning after pill but your time limit has expired (72 hrs), so that really isn't an option.
Even if he hasn't talked to you, you have the right to ask him if he used protection. If not, that was wrong to take advantage of the situation, on his part.
Remember in the future you can't always depend on the other person to be responsible. You have to take actions to protect yourself.
get to your gyno right now, and talk about what you can do. He is the one who really would be able to help you at this point. Good luck. Hope everything works out for you.