(To skip some of the background info, go to the last paragraph)
Alright, I've met this awesome girl. She's 18 and from what she's told me, she seems to be quite experienced. She hasn't really told me too much directly regarding her level of experience, but just through our conversations, it's obvious. I also know for fact she's not a virgin and has had sex with at least a couple of guys. On the other hand, I'm 20 and have almost no experience. I've had oral sex once (I received, and it was a weird situation), and I've only made-out with one other girl (not the same girl that gave me oral).
Last night was amazing. Even though I have mono (NOT from kissing other girls), I still went over to her house cause she promised to take care of me. She pampered me like crazy. It was great. We met a few of her friends, snuggled, laid in bed watching a movie, and talked. What's amazing is she still kissed me even though I have mono because she doesn't care :eek: . Wow. I had told her I wanted to kiss her but I was sick with mono, she just leaned in for a kiss. We kissed twice last night, no major making out, but it was good.
Well, I really wanted to stay the night, but I just wasn't feeling well and knew I wouldn't be able to sleep with such a great girl next to me. So I finally told her it would be best if I go home :( Well, when I got home, I phoned her up, and she was FINGERING HERSELF! So we had phone sex for a good 15 minutes.. just unbelievable.. she totally wants to **** me.. the only reason we didn't that night was because I was sick.
Well here's the problem. While we were on the phone, she asked me what my favourite sex position was. I just froze.. and was like "umm.. I guess you'll just have to wait to find out.".... I am a virgin! I've had a couple opportunities in the past, but never took them, because it just didn't feel right. But this time, I want it. Should I tell her I'm a virgin?! I really don't want her to be turned-off by this! Do you think she would get turned-off?We've only been going out for a week, but we first met in December and would see each other every few weeks at my work and talk for a bit... Also her and her best friend tell me she's never been so happy in her life now that she's with me.
Well hopefully someone will read through this and give me their opinion.
for sure man, don't hide the fact that your a virgin. It's not a bad thing at all, at least you can boast that you're STD free.
So yeah, just tell her, if she's a nice girl like you say then she won't care at all and she might even feel "special" that you are choosing to do these "first times" with her. The girl I was with for my first times thought it was cute that I didn't know how to do anything.
If she's turned off by it, then she's a whore and you don't need that ****.
You are in no way obligated to reveal the fact that you are a virgin, or anything about what you've done with other people in the past, etc. The only thing you really need to disclose is information regarding sexual safety (if you have infections, if you've been tested, etc.)
But chances are she'll really appreciate the disclosure. :) By revealing it, you make yourself more vulnerable and show that you trust her with your feelings. If you get into a longer relationship, she'll probably find out sooner or later and she would probably be really disappointed that you didn't tell her it was your first time. In your position, I would definitely reveal that fact.
I was older than you when I met my first gf and I basically told her everything and it very much brought us closer together. Though she actually told her mom that I was a virgin... maybe that is part of why her mom loved me so much too and actually encouraged her daughter to NOT use a condom with me. :)
thanks for the help!
you don't HAVE to tell her you're inexperienced, however wouldn't it be an advantage to tell her? I mean, you telling her will have her feel more special because [1] you disclosed personal, somewhat embarrasing (for some) information and [2] she would be your first.
If you don't tell her, then that's okay as well. BUT, and I do want to stress this, make sure she doesn't have any std's to pass. When my first time came around, the girl I was with freaked the hell out of me because that thought was in the back of my mind... and she was cheating on me... that's probably isn't your case, but nonetheles be wary.
personally, if i found out i was a guys "first", i would be flattered and a little bit excited...as everyone has already said, you by no means have any obligation to disclose this to her- but i think it is to your advantage. if she is scared off, chances are she isn't a keeper
honestly, i think my best part of my relationship with my man is the fact that he is more inexperienced than me. yea we cuddle and i take care of him and stuff but i love that i'm taking care of him even though i feel like i should be more submissive. let her take care of you it'll feel good i promise.