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> ps. keep in mind i had a knee operation so nething that doesnt involve too much knee pressure

Please click on the Home Page link. The site has a great section on sexual positions that are not only illustrated, they are animated as well! Pick and choose form among the many and enjoy.

> me & my bf have been together for 3months now and our sex is great but recently there's been a few times when it kinda stops been hard?

What is "it"? The sex is not hard or his penis? :eek:

Erections come and erections go, seemingly having a mind of their own. These things happen to all of us. Let me ask this question in all seriousness: What would you do if greeted by a flaccid penis in the beginning of a love making session? This can happen and frequently does with older men. The correct answer is that you continue to kiss and fondle and make out, working on (re)building his erection from all the kissing and caressing and/or by directly stimulating the penis by hand and/or mouth {Foreplay). Please do not think that just because an erection becomes less hard or goes away altogether that the evening's activities are over; far be it. This is when you fall back and continue all the Necking and Petting and Foreplay.

> he tells me its because hes stressed at work, but i need some great new sexy ideas to really turn him on and keep it that way! you guys have any?

Absolutely. This is not all about finding some great new sexy ideas--
it is absolutely about existing methodology. Sex is not about five minutes of kissing and cuddling and then jumping right into oral sex and whatever might follow. WRONG. Fooling around and making out is comprised of the following stages: "Necking", "Petting", "Heavy Petting", and, "Foreplay".

* Necking consists of kissing and caressing above the shoulders
* Petting continues with activities all the way down the arms and torso to the waist, exclusive of the breasts
* Heavy Petting includes fondling the breasts and partially undressing (blouse, bra, shirts)
* Foreplay consists of kissing, licking/lapping, and/or stroking the penis and genitals

Excitement and anticipation should be built both over time (weeks/months) and during each session. All too often nowadays, young people are operating under the misguided impression that the way to their orgasms is quickly with a rush to the finish line. This is OK when a couple is interested in the proverbial "Quickie", NOT WHEN YOU ARE INTERESTED IN EXPRESSING THE LOVE YOU HAVE FOR ONE ANOTHER. A great make out session should not be shorter than half an hour, longer within reason, before moving on to Foreplay.

Please slow down. Take time to enjoy the adventure along the way as well as the destination. Please begin reading the articles linked in the Index. Learn about how to make out, learn about boundaries, Implied consent, kissing, caressing, and more. Knowledge is empowering and this is what the two of you need.

Please feel free to ask questions, although, do some reading, first. I hope this is of help.

Why is it that women always think THEY have to do something to get their men into sex?

Sweety - if he's NOT up to it - he's not up to it.

But I certainly hope he has more skills than just 'penis insertion'.

If he's not properly hydrated, if he's tired, if he's ill, if he's stressed, if he's over age 40 - there are many many reasons why a man will not get, be, and/or stay hard - and none of them have anything to do with you and whatever 'sexy idea' you might come up with.

Please listen to Doc and also consult the sticky post entitled The Program.

LOL Doc. You must have these speeches saved to a notepad file or something because people seem to be asking the same questions over and over.

But yeah, like they said, erections come and go without reason sometimes. I know that I have lost an erection a few times for no valid reason. I was very turned on by the girl so it wasn't her. Just keep making out and stuff that Doc said and hope it comes back soon :)

Ha! I do have some of the replies saved in order to copy and paste. Most of the time I just retype if the information is short.

I am thinking of writing to the Moderators asking them if it is possible to put the Index in line right after a newbe joins. My idea is to have them go there, first, at least find a "Continue" button at the bottom of page 2 that will then let them see the Forums after hopefully seeing what information is readily available. If possible, maybe this will slow people down. Placing the Index at the top of the main screen has helped when we moved it there a year ago after the previous revamping but we still have the ago old problem of overly enthusiastic people just jumping in without reading the instructions or doing any reconnoitering.

Mmmmmmmmmmmmm - I heartily recommend 'reconnoitering'.
*evil grin*

I am over 40, have a lot of stress, and sometime have a hard time remaining hard (pun intended). But even when my penis is out of action, I still have my fingers and mouth and am not shy in using them. It is rare for me to leave her dissatisfied. :rolleyes:

Excellent man, Joe!!!

yeah montage, but mnay here can tell you my ideas are not always doable, or well realistic, but i do have some, grasp his hair next time, tell him if he doesnt get his tongue hard, ( at this point you should shove his head down into your sweet spot, ) his dick wont get soft,, does his lack of erection stop him from pleasuring you ? if it does then hes not doing you any good either, you could try ( joking here unless you are into this kind of thing ) slapping him a few times before you push his head down as described above, then toss him on his face on the end of the bed, his legs off the end, grab a huge dildo, slip half into you, shove your hand on the small of his back, and threaten to show him what a real man would do if he doesnt get hard right now, ( you could slap his booty a few times right here, it isnt necessary but it would add to the ambiance of the situation ) , but its kinda important to reach down and check if hes hard, he may be too shocked to give an audible answer, and wouldnt you feel dumb if you actually showed him in a heat of agression, got into the moment and stuff, and he really was already hard, oops doesnt cover that kind of egg, lol, on a lighter note, no forget it, cant come up with anything, just dont hurt him ok

Yay! Another Aussie! :D

How often are you actually having sex? I have found that if you are having sex all the time (Say everyday) with the same partner it can get a little bit stale & some of the excitement is lost.

Also, does he initiate the encounter or do you?

Personally, I have never had a problem rising to the occation ;) but if he is saying there maybe stress involved, then maybe you should not force the issue.

Sex in all it's glory is ment to be enjoyed by both parties. So if he's not in the mood, then give him his space. Of course, that street goes both ways :)

Yeah, give him space - as in "bye bye, baby, bye-bye."

quoting Janis Joplin

i dont know, i have lots of thoughts, ( mostly they turn rude ) if hes not into it, there could be a teeny tiny thing that you are not doing or providing, beyond that, if hes not able to get hard or stay hard, and thats his resume, get hard then soft, you are giving him wayy better the you are getting, ( 2 y's intended), it might mean hes looking elsewhere, and settling for you, personally, i have been unable to get it up at times, but i didnt even know it, i was so involved in pleasuring her at the time, it came as a surprise to us both, i think lifes too short to change who we are for a few minutes of attention from just someone, and yes girls , do it all the time, they feel guilty and expend lots and lots of their psyche trying to please someone who would rather be playing a video game, if you want direct blunt advice, is he using the opprotunity of being soft to pleasure you, does he tend to your desires when hes hard? getting you off when he cant, i say keep him, stress him out, if not, you could stay with him, baby him and cater to his every sexual or kinky or whimsical desire, till he finally leaves, this would be a perfect place to give advice to all woman in general, but naaaahh