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Hymen broke, but not the first time?

okay, so this isn't my first time, my first time was May 2010.
It was awkward and it was over kind of quickly, due to nervousness and inexperience (although it was not unpleasant)
Now my boyfriend is definitely big enough for me (about 6 to 6.5 inches when hard) but I didn't bleed or feel alot of pain (except my vagina felt a little more stretched out than usual)
But about a month after that, we were going quite rough, and I felt a sharp pain, and was bleeding a bit.
I thought I felt something rip.
It may just be in my head, but is it possible for the hymen to break even though it's not your first time?

Yes, not unusual. You most likely tore it partly in your first brief encounter and finished the job in your later experience. Possibly your hymen was a bit thick or you simply did not become distended enough to do the job. The length would be irrelevant as the girth does the job.

If bleeding continued it would indicate some other damage.


From an evolutionary point of view, I wonder why women were given a hymen? After all, we try in our society to have some sort of equality between the sexes, yet here again we have the poor lady of our species destined to be proven as a 'non-virgin' as having had sexual intercourse. (I am aware that the hymen may break due to non-sexual activity, or so I am told). A bloke can put it about as he wishes, and there is no evidence that he has done so.
Obviously there is not the same importance attached to virginity as there was 100 years ago, although I think it is considered quite seriously in some cultures.
Any thoughts on this?:confused:

At birth, the female genitalia are quite well formed but the vagina is closed, or nearly so, to prevent various nasties from entering. An opening forms at about a rate of 1 mm per year until we reach puberty. This will allow menstrual flow and, if the opening does not form, must be done surgically. As the hormones kick in, the vagina and related tissue begin to become elastic to accommodate entry. The hymen is the same tissue as the vagina but is no longer needed and, so, becomes thinner and stretchable ready to be worn away, torn or whatever is necessary to allow us to function. The hymen is strongest at birth and actually becomes weaker as the years pass.

Some women's do not become sufficiently weakened to allow penetration. Most of these can be corrected with a bit of a nick in the surgery. Some very few require more extensive surgery if the hymen develops as "skin" rather than as vaginal lining.

Be certain that old mum nature could care less about appearances and does not want us to be virgins too long. The hymen is protective until that is no longer necessary and then it changes its character and has no further biological role. Get rid of it!

RedRoses's picture

Fascinating! Thanx Brandye!

So when 4 years old the entrance is appr 4mm and your own finger wouldn't be much more than that, right? I'm very sure I discovered my vagina age 4, after boys a little older than me had forced me on the ground and been poking at it with their fingers. I'm guessing that given the relative size of fingers compared to the opening would have made that possible (though not favorable)...

Also; is there a difference when going into puberty sooner or later? I had breasts and grew pubic hair around age 9 and my first period barely 11. Would you say that with girls that go into puberty sooner the entrance is still smaller (perhaps growing along a bit)? Or that the entrance simply developed faster, iow: is just as "open" as with a girl going into puberty around the age of 15. I'd say the latter, but it remains a guess :) My physician did say at the time that it wasn't weird that I couldn't use tampons, because I was still so young. Thinking about it; I'm not sure whether he meant my physique or just not being mentally ready for anything like that.

Also; now that we're into biology ;) My teacher in highschool taught us that when the vaginal tube is developing, it starts from both ways; the uterus-side and the outside, meeting somewhere in the middle. It differs each girl where that is exactly and this either becomes a total smooth seal or a little rim of tissue. It could be felt inside the vagina when in about a phalanx perhaps 2. This little rim usually erodes when the vagina is used for sexual activity (or frequent use of tampons). If present, he said this is more likely to be felt than a rim of tissue directly at the entrance, since that would have gone in most just by jumping on their bikes to school each morning. I wonder how these relate to eachother... The female diagrams usually depict the hymen directly at the entrance and don't mention such tissue deeper inside... :confused:

Yes, it is possible for a SMALL finger to penetrate at the age of four in many girls. This depends both upon the opening developing on schedule and how tough her hymen is. Some would experience pain because of the lack of elasticity.

Yes, the age of puberty can accelerate the development of the vagina. It is not the age in years that matters but the production of hormones. At about the time the breast becomes buds, you can be certain that the hormones are beginning to flow. This does not mean the vagina is prepared for a penis, only that it is getting ready. By the onset of menses, a high degree of flexibility has been developed but the young body is not yet ready for pregnancy and damage can be done by a penis.

Your high school teacher was going well beyond what most of us know or need to know about development of the sex organs. There are actually three theories about this development and the explanation of each involves various hormones present in minute quantities in various stage of development. What matter is that the vagina is there and sealed off, by the hymen, at birth. I know nothing of the "rim" he is talking about at which the two ends, he suggests, join. That would not, under any circumstances, be the hymen. He is certainly correct in that many of us lost our hymens on bikes, horses, in sport, gymnastics and general activity.

At the point that you had pubic hair at age nine you vagina was becoming mature and it was likely more able to handle penetration sooner than most of your schoolmates at that same age. The pubic hair and breasts are related only because they are dependent upon the same hormones that begin to cause the vagina, itself, to mature.


Interesting I have never heard the purpose or process of the hymen. Once it has been broken how is it reattached? I heard older cultures that require "proof of purity" from the woman there is a demand for such a procedure.


And I guess I always assumed the hymen was farther inside the vagina than that. The pain I had at my first penile penetration--well into my 20's after having had experience with tampons and fingering--seemed farther into the vagina than that. Shows how sheltered I grew up I guess LOL

RedRoses's picture

Thanx for your clarification Brandye!

Int, we also were confronted with some resistance inside my vagina when he was about half way in the first time (me being 22). We had to do some manoeuvrings, adjusting the angle of my hips. I figured this resistance was either what my biologyteacher had referred to (which is doubtful, considering Brandye's post) or just because a vagina isn't a straight tube and neither is a penis. It didn't hurt, but I remember it felt like we pushed his penis around a corner or past a bump or whatever. Interesting would be that according to my bf entering me nowadays does not feel any different than it did the first time (which he considers a very tight fit compared to previous gf's). So it apparently didn't matter much to his experience.

Aged 4, I remember mostly feeling pain after. Not that weird considering the forcing, poking and playing around with sand and twigs (don't ask me why they thought it funny to also pore sand over me :()... When I gently explored the area myself later in bed -because I wanted to know what on earth was so interesting there- it didn't hurt. I made the pleasant discovery of my clit. But I do remember being frightened when my finger slid in my vagina (help, there's a hole in me!:eek:).