I tease my wife through foreplay with my tongue and fingers on her clitoris. She get so worked up and then tells me she is properly teased and ready to move on. She will let me tease her and when she gets to a certain point in pleasure she will tense up and bring her legs together giving the indication she orgasmed. My feelings on this is she is getting to the threshold of pleasurable orgasms but not going over the edge. I guess I feel she thinks she made it to the edge and thinks that is the orgasm. Any thoughts on this or help?
Fri, 10/26/2007 - 19:45
#1
How will I know if she has a full orgasm
It is her orgasm. There is no way you will ever know. Perhaps the two of you see a sex counselor both individually and together. But, if she is happy, why are ou not?
Yup...I also state in one of the Sticky posts that it is good etiquette for a woman to let a man know so he won't ask the age old question of "did you cum (yet)". Ask her to give you some feedback in the way of a squeeze of the hand or a verbal cue like a "whew", or some other word or utterance that the two of you work out. A whisper or a hand movement are not enough to destroy the moment.
Is is possible that she is afraid to go for that extra inning or she thinks she has an orgasm and just can't take any more teasing? We are both happy but I am hoping I am doing my job correctly. I don't want her getting bad service so to speak.
> Is is possible that she is afraid to go for that extra inning or she thinks she has an orgasm and just can't take any more teasing?
How do you define "teasing"? Are using the word in place of fingering and/or oral as a way to stimulate and raise her ardor, or, are you using the word characteristically? I think "aroused" is probably a better word for this.
Only she can provide an answer. Most likely her reply will change from session to session depending upon how she feels and what her drive and mood are like. Many women can enjoy multiple orgasms in rapid succession, although capability and desire are two different matters. Please read these informative articles:
Female Sexual Response
The Anatomy of the Female "O", Answered by Brandye & Dancingdoc2 & Inspired by Godiva
> We are both happy but I am hoping I am doing my job correctly. I don't want her getting bad service so to speak.
The two of you need to begin communicating. In part the intent of the Sexual Revolution of the 1960s was to quite literally take this wonderful activity out of the dark--both the lack of light and lack of knowledge. Well, decades later, many people will still not make love unless it is totally black. In addition, what we used to do to her (for our own benefit) with little regard, knowledge, or, caring--for her emotional or physiological needs, has given rise to lots of sex manuals, and psychology books, including informational internet sites like this one. Making love nowadays emphasizes what we do with and for each other. We can only do this with information and knowledge that comes directly from our partner as well as these other resources.
Feedback is also an important tool for getting answers to your concerns. This is clearly explained in one of the articles listed in the Index. I recommend the two of you read the articles it lists.
I think teasing is the wrong word. What I mean to say is pleasing her both orally and with hands and fingers. Basically, I am trying to get her off.
Yup! I figured as much, yet when reading a person's account of events, we have choices of interpreting the story literally, reading between the lines, or at face value. Thanks for the confirmation. I hope these replies have helped you.
I think the answer is simple: just keep going!
When she squeezes her legs together and looks like she's on the edge, go faster and don't stop till she cums or absolutely can't take it anymore.
If she's only going to the edge, you'll get her over it.
Just be a bit careful and dont be continually rubbing her clit when she squeezes her legs together. My g/f does the same when she is orgasming. She tenses up for the rush and sorta does a tad bit of a convulsion and her legs come together when she gets off. If you are doing something like massaging the gspot while using the thumb on her clit make sure when she squeezes up to continue with the gspot but dont do too much on the clit b/c she can become very sensitive fast from it. You dont want her orgasming then feeling the pain right after. Gl though and talk to her about it also =p.
when my boyfriend is using his fingers on me, i always show him i've cum by just going quiet (i'm a quiet orgasmer) then closing my legs and snuggling up to him.