Okay well first of all i would like to say im new here so i may be putting this into the wrong area on the forum so sorry mods.
Anyways...i have had a few sexual partners and have never really had many problems but one question that has always come to mind is how long i should be lasting. It seems that whether im receiving oral ( im male btw), having sex or she is just lending a hand that things dont last overly long amounts of time.
I mean in porn movies and such things go on for so long it seems and they can just keep going.
Just looking for feedback on how long things usualy last with yours bf or if your a guy how long you yourself go for.
also maybe some suggestions on exersizes or anything i can do to help make things last longer.
Thu, 01/05/2006 - 06:58
#1
how long is normal?
That's not really a question one can answer. It is very similar to the long-penis myths.
Once intercourse has begun, I have been known to last anywhere from under a minute to well over 30 minutes. On overage, I fall between 5 and 10. Is this normal? I don't know, nor do I need to. Both her and I are happy.
There a few things I do know, though.
Here are a few general ideas on how to last longer. They may not all work for you, but they should help.
1. First, I generally try to bring my girlfriend to orgasm during foreplay. Let's me move onto the sex with less pressure, more wetness, and (for her, anyway) subsequent orgasms come quicker and better.
2. I've discovered that the less lubrication, the easier it is to come -- with an obvious apex being reached where it feels like almost nothing for either party. This works best with the above suggestion.
3. Wearing a condom does help, much in the same way lube does. Lesser sensations, safer (if only to prevent pregnancy), and still feels great for both.
4. If you can, climaxing during foreplay would be an obvious way to make sex last longer. On the opposite end of the spectrum, if she gets you close to coming during foreplay, that can make you last shorter during the actual intercourse.
In my experience the real criteria is your confidence, your mood and how sexually excited you are. Your best bet is to go with it....
Also note that for at least my girlfriend, coming close to orgasming but falling short is always frustrating, be it the first, second or beyond (getting more so as it goes). Masturbating her during sex can obviously speed her along to bliss, and even after you come, your hand is still a powerful tool.
Another thing, during intercourse, if you are about to come, simply slowing to a near stop to delay it slightly will only serve to diminish her pleasure. Either finish and help her with alternate means, or stop for a short period and return to some foreplay with her as the emphasis.
Oh, and as probably 90% of the people on this forum have said -- don't pay any attention to porn. Those guy have those jobs not just because they are "above average," but also because they have the ability to do that. Is it a good thing? Most definetely not. Sure, you could screw for an hour, but how many times do you think she can come before she's done and then it's just waiting for you to finish, hoping you do before all the lubrication is gone and it becomes painful. Not to mention her feeling inadaquate that it takes you so long. Professional porn is a class of "sex" that shouldn't really be imitated or idolised. On the other hand, if you really want to reproduce it, just take a viagra, masturbate and then get to it. See how much that is....
Lastly, if she isn't supportive, and loving, then sex is too emphisised in your relationship, and you have bigger problems.
most stories i've heard from people is that a lot of guys, particularly the young ones, usually don't last longer than 5 minutes.
As a story to show you how lasting long can be as much a pain as it can be a good thing, I had sex for the first time a couple of years ago. I didn't orgasm my first time (and i'm a guy). I went at it for thirty minutes, and hardly felt anything. I didn't orgasm for the first two months i was sexually active even, and this was having sex about once a week. It was causing fights with my girl friend because she was feeling inadequate. It just sucked in general. Two years, and two sexual partners later, I've gotta say, not much has changed. Now i don't go at it and then just stop, acting all disappointed. I've started faking when i can't actually orgasm (hoping she doesn't notice how empty the condom is). Just keep doing what you're doing, you will get used to it, or grow up and lose some of the hormones, and you'll be able to have sex longer. you're not abnormal now though, or at least much less so than i am. Be glad you have your orgasms at least
I have had partners ejaculate on the way in and others that I had to stop because I was getting sore - latex is really quite abrasive. As with size, lasting is greatly over-rated. I do not reach orgasm through penile thrusting. That is true of about half of all women.
You will have to do something else to help me over the threshhold so I am satisfied with a few minutes of having you in me. I do enjoy taking a man in and receiving what is left there but stimulation towards climax comes from other appendages.