i am almost completly new to sex... i lost my virginity a week before my 18th b day and well i am with the same guy and all and we don't get much time for sex... i get it once a week... sometimes more.... mainly less... (i live at a place called job corps it sucks) but when we get the time to have sex i just don't tell him what i like... what would really make me scream.
I suck at communication... before we **** should i tell him... i want to do some kinky things and i am pretty sure he would be wililng to but what if he gets digusted... i want him to cum on me or do things slower and tease me and tie me up ... do it rough at times ... make it hurt and tear me open... but how do i tell him... ??? HELP:confused:
Wow. It seems like your situation could be easily solved depending on what your boyfriend is like. Does he like taking risks and is his life pretty mediocre and mundane? Cause if its a yes... Then I think you can just Flat Out Tell him all those dirty, crazy thoughts to him Straight Up.
I, personally would be not only amazed and glad that my girlfriend woudl be so open about her kinky thoughts, but so amazingly turned on.
Yep, it'll probably turn him on and I think you'll be having a lot more sex!!! Get into a little make-out session and start whispering some of those hot little ideas in his ear while slowly sucking on his earlobe and lightly dipping your tongue into his ear. (Watch the slobber, though!) He'll be pounding you before you know it!!
i like it when my g/f whispers it into my ear... its turns me on bad... then i do it right away.
> I suck at communication... before we **** should i tell him... i want to do some kinky things
In business management there is a saying that goes: "Plan your work and work your plan". When this and similar concerns have been asked in the past it has always been my recommendation for a couple to have a discussion at a time when you are not planning to be intimate. In other words, find a time when the two of you are relaxed, in good moods, and you will have some uninterrupted time to chat. Preface your conversation by telling him what you want to talk about so he can look forward to the conversation. If you just apporach him and say that you want to talk about sex or how you make love you might well place him on the defensive when it is not your intent.
So, now that you have his attention, ask him what he would like to include in your love making and then tell him what your wish list includes. Then see how he feels about each one and if necessary negotiate or agree to try one or more--just once to see how well each of you likes doing this and that.
> i want him to cum on me
This ought to be easy. If you are giving him a hand job and/or oral, then you can decide where he will deposit his semen because you will be able to position the end of the "hose" where you want it! If he is priming the "pump" then you can either aim him in the direction you want or simply ask him to cum on you "here".
> ... or do things slower and tease me and tie me up
This is not an unreasonable request. You can even tell him in the heat of the moment that you are not ready and want more of this or that or that you enjoy what he is doing and want more of it before he ends it.
You can also do the same for him.
> ... do it rough at times ... make it hurt and tear me open... but how do i tell him... ???
Well now, maybe this is just my hangup but I do not like nor recommend rough sex. What I do like is the appearance of this--there is a distinct difference. I do not think there is anything wrong with play acting the roughness, not being rough.
As for being tied up, this is also not an unreasonable request. What the two of you must absolutely have is an escape plan for this or any other activity. The two of you must agree on a word or phrase that when uttered is an automatic [COLOR="Red">STOP[/COLOR] sign. You never want to compromise this word or phase. When one or the other of you says this then everything stops and right then.
"Tear me open"...what do you mean by this?? Surely, you jest.