What have you been doing with your girlfriend? It is a little hard to offer suggestions unless we know where you have been.

[QUOTE=warriors 1-on-1]well, weve done things like oral sex and ive fingered her.?[/QUOTE]

Focus not on what you do but how you do what you do. The how can be varied considerably and the order of things mixed up for variety and spice.

In addition, consider romancing her beginning hours ahead of when you actually plan to get physical. You can begin with a wake up call, a phone call during the day that is short, sweet, and to the point, saying that you love her, are thinking about her and what the two of you (or just you) have planned for later that night. The phone call should say this and nothing more. The idea is to whet her appetite.

When you do become physical, begin differently than you normally do and spend no less than 3/4 of an hour on making out; more if possible. Get each other all worked up and in a frenzy of anticipation and tension, first, before ever getting to the foreplay.

Make love in a different place. If you cannot, something as simple as turning around on the bed so your heads are at the foot of the bed can be enough of a change to renew interest.

There are so many different things to do with oral sex. Different techniques and just vary the way you move your tongue and lips on her labia and then working your way to the clit. I will sometimes spend time on her clit and finger her at the same time. You may want to shave each others pubic hair and then have oral. It is such a different feeling with no hair. It can also be fun to do it in other areas as mentioned above. Either other areas in the house or even outside. Some of the best bj's and oral on my partner have been outside. Not that you do this in front of other people, but in secluded areas. We have fun doing it on balconies when travelling or at home. Takes the right place to enjoy this and it is usually on a dark night. Even been able to enjoy it out on the boat. Great to have the sun on your naked body and have your lips on your partners vagina. Just a few quick suggestions.

An example:

Instead of purchasing an expensive vibrator or one of dubious worth, make your own! I venture to say that at one time or another, every guy has made sounds like a motor boat by expelling air from the mouth through the lips, thus allowing them to vibrate.

Gently touch your lips to the labia and clitoris while making the motor noise and your lips will titillate and tantalize handsomely. You can blow air silently or you can add sound by humming. The resulting sound will resemble the sound kids make mimicing an outboard motor, lawn mower, etc.

Changing the pressure, changing the rate of the moving air, changing the sound and pitch, etc., will change the sensations.

Just remmber the most importantist thing in a relationship is COMMUNICATION!!!!!!

[QUOTE=dancingdoc2;145598]An example:

Instead of purchasing an expensive vibrator or one of dubious worth, make your own! I venture to say that at one time or another, every guy has made sounds like a motor boat by expelling air from the mouth through the lips, thus allowing them to vibrate.

Gently touch your lips to the labia and clitoris while making the motor noise and your lips will titillate and tantalize handsomely. You can blow air silently or you can add sound by humming. The resulting sound will resemble the sound kids make mimicing an outboard motor, lawn mower, etc.

Changing the pressure, changing the rate of the moving air, changing the sound and pitch, etc., will change the sensations.[/QUOTE]

I've got to hand it to you, Doc. This worked great. It had her screaming bloody murder--literally. I had been using my fingers. She likes the short, rapid movements, which wears my arm out. I could do this for an hour or more with about a 30% success rate and it was killing my arm. So, on searching the forum, I found this technique and decided to give it a try. Now, I am 100% in bringing her to orgasm.

The first time we tried it, she was screaming her head off, so much so, security buzzed the apartment and asked her 3 times if she was ok. She assured them that everything was ok. About 10 minutes later, the head of security buzzed the apartment. She told him that everything was ok, but he said that the sounds that were heard were of someone being murdered, so he had to come up and search the apartment. Of course, we were butt naked, scrambling to get dress. Meanwhile, he was banging at the door, demanding that we let him in right now. Finally, my fiancee got dressed and we let him in. The neighbors were all huddled behind him hoping to get a glimpse of the victim or the perpetrator. My fiancee was quick to invent a story. He took my passport and her ID information. After they saw no murder had taken place, the ladies had big grins on their face. I couldn't understand what they were saying, but I have a good idea. I don't think the security officer believed a word she said, but he was quick to accept the story. It was an uncomfortable situation for him as well.

This technique is the only way she likes it now. At first, she said the orgasm wasn't as intense, only lasting a couple of second. The other way, it was more like five seconds. Anytime it happened, she would ball up in the fetal position and start wailing. If I touched her, she would scream, "Don't touch me!" Being able to do the motor boat technique more frequently and more successfully, it has given her the opportunity control her emotions and guide me into what to do to make it last longer and more intense. Also, it has helped her have orgasms during intercourse. I don't quite understand why, but I think she is just learning her body better. Only six months ago, she had never heard of an orgasm. She freaked the first couple of times I tried to stimulate her. Now she can't live without it.

Thanks for the suggestion.

Please go find, read and then DO the sticky posts entitled The Program and Body Worship.

Please understand that the better you get at sharing sex with your partner, the less time you will spend worrying about position and techniques, spicing it up, etc. - you will know what is important.

I listen to my wife and gauge her reactions. Over time I have learned what does the trick and I throw in new techniques whether that be oral or regular sex. She always tells me what did it for her even if its just by her reaction. But you definitely don't need to purchase a toy just experiment and communicate and don't be afraid to put yourself outside of what you think is comfortable. Don't go crazy but try new things even if you feel a little self conscious about it.