I don't know what to feel... shame or whatever

[Spicygirl82]

Hey everyone. Earlier today I saw an article I think here on the forum somewhere about a transsexual appearing in a nude shot in a European magazine. I looked at the article and saw the picture and then I became curious. I wanted to know if female to male sex change surgeries looked real or not so I looked up some pictures on a porn site that I used to go to and know is safe. Well, the pictures were of "shemales" and I totally wasn't expecting this but the pictures actually kind of turned me on. I felt so weird about it after looking at the pictures. I totally didn't expect to have that sort of reaction but I had no control over my feelings of arousal. I don't know what to feel now. I don't know if I should be ashamed or what. I mean, I feel kinda strange. I mean, I do respect transsexuals and those who choose to get some sort of sex change surgery done and all but I never expected to be turned on by pictures of that sort. Am I normal? I know that may sound like a strange question and I know the likely answer but I just don't "feel" normal now.

That said, I am bisexual so maybe that had something to do with it.

[raunchy gal]

NO DON'T BE ASHAMED.....I'm sure these WOMEN as they are after surgery would LOVE to be thought of in A LOVING & SENSUAL way.I'm a heterosexual/bi-curious 40 something woman and i find your curiosity perfectly NATURAL

[dancingdoc2]

Take the persona out of the equation. Guys can be turned on by a mannequin with or without clothing. Same thing with a real body, regardless of the gender or how it is derived.

It's the body and form that turned you on, not the mind inside.

[Spicygirl82]

Originally Posted by raunchy gal

NO DON'T BE ASHAMED.....I'm sure these WOMEN as they are after surgery would LOVE to be thought of in A LOVING & SENSUAL way.I'm a heterosexual/bi-curious 40 something woman and i find your curiosity perfectly NATURAL

Thanks so much! I honestly felt really weird about my reaction to those photos.

Originally Posted by dancingdoc2

Take the persona out of the equation. Guys can be turned on by a mannequin with or without clothing. Same thing with a real body, regardless of the gender or how it is derived.

It's the body and form that turned you on, not the mind inside.

Oh okay. Thanks DancingDoc! That does make sense.

[RedRoses]

It's nothing to be ashamed of, I think it's great!

The thing I'm a bit ashamed of is how my brain seems to get a bit confused, while looking at transsexuals... As if I'm accepting the person, yet still my brain keeps repeating: "does not compute!" I've known a hermaphrodite who decided (s)he didn't wanted to be male or female anymore. I didn't know him/her personally, but felt very sorry for how the world was treating this person... (S)he felt like (s)he was neither and both, which I could totally understand: why would it be obligated to make such decision? So (s)he wore both men and women clothing, just depending on the feeling of the day. But got puzzled every time going to a restroom, dressing/lockerroom, etc. It was either: EEEEE! A man with breasts don't belong with the men! Or: EEEEEE! A woman with a penis doesn't belong with the women!

Even talking about him/her is difficult, as I realize again now! It's really typical how the world is so divided in male/female. First thing we exclaim at birth is: it's a boy! or it's a girl! Once we become sexually active, the question is again about sexes. I heard this quote in a beautiful song once: "If I sleep with a girl, does that make me gay? If I sleep with a boy, does that make me straight? And if I sleep alone does that make me anything or nothing?"

Our language relies on the difference between sexes. Talking about "it" would be linguistically correct, yet feels so wrong because of the demeaning factor, if you catch my drift? Which is also typical: how can neuter grammar be demeaning? Why do we use the same term for the sterilization of an animal? It's like it means: stripped of it's nature. Is it really that important whatever dangles in between our legs??? Everyone is beautiful in their own imperfect way!