She's partially straight - confusing me!

[Ducy]

Okay now the title seems odd, but I am curious. Is it possible to be bi, but like shift more towards one side? Like my girlfriend said that she loves me and that she wanted to fool around with me. But she finds herself wanting to be do things with girls. And I guess she has always been like this.

What I get confused about is that she loved to play with and look at my member, in fact on more than one occasion this alone made her incredibly horny. I mean...I feel like that shows she is at least bi, and the reasoning behind girls is because abuse, and just indentifying with females since her abuser was male. (and have been told this happens alot).

I guess really is that Im looking for closure. I mean I just kinda would like to know if there is actually hope. Because she doesnt want me to just dissappear. In fact she wants to basically be like how we have been, just without the hand holding, hugging, kissing etc. Like best friends. And she still wants to move out with me, so I am really confused. I just dont know.

Its like she wants to be with me, but wants to fool around with girls, so it is confusing the crap out of me.

[sera300]

Ducy,
Time for you to move on with your life and allow her to figure hers out. She sounds bi curious. She owes it to you and mainly herself to find out if she is willing to pursue a relationship w/another woman. You need to get out and just remain a distant friend. All the stuff w/her is too much to manage for any man, she needs to get it straight first. I am talking about all the posts. And you need to keep busy. You are young a whole life is a head for you; seize it.

[Brandye]

I became bi-sexually active at fifteen. I have lived parts of my life straight (and thought I was) and parts as a lesbian (and thought I was lesbian).

I am now actively bi- and will likely not change. Either choose to live with it (not recommended as a long term thing) or follow sera's advice.

[Ducy]

What do you mean live with it?

[Brandye]

"live with it" = accept it and adjust your life to accommodate her alternative desires

[Ducy]

OOOOOOOoh...got it. Well I'm just going to give her time to think. Cuz she has these feelings but she doesn't know if its just a subconscious thing because she is still awkward about the past, or if it is just that she is gay and thats the end of it.

[Brandye]

....or she may be like me and unwilling to give up either side.

[Ducy]

Gosh I really hope so. I mean everything feels perfect when were with each other, and she has even said when we cuddle and kiss its perfect. So I hope its bi-

[Brandye]

Well, then you will faced with having a g/f who nneds a lot of space and you will always wonder what she is doing with all that space.

[Ducy]

That is true...man oh man this sucks...I mean its just such a terrible feeling, knowing that the person you love doesnt know if they love you the same way.