Bi-curiousity in women

[clare_o]

When I was younger I wasn't curious at all but now that I'm in my 30s, the last couple of years I've found myself drawn to women although have never actually acted on it or experimented at all. I think I would though if the opportunity was there.

[Brandye]

Clare,

You are not alone and, believe me, the opportunity is there. With about one in every three married women giving it a try, you do have opportunity.

In my very small town, I am aware of at least three long term married women who have "tea dates" regularly. With my bi-sexuality generally know, I do get some requests.

[sarah_rsl]

A lot of lesbian experiences mine include were little more than mutual masturbation with friends. For myself at a certain time and place I found it easier to find my sexual release with a friend than with a man. And i found it much more pleasant than masturbation. But there wasn't really a sexual attraction.

At the the end of the day Lesbian sex is very much a male preoccupation. I might actually comment here on the poster who began it but anywho... there are a lot of men out there going through the motions of lesbianism just for the attention of some man.

[Brandye]

Reread your post after the .... Huh?

And eremember, you are reporting your experience and feelings as we each report ours. I have difficulty that "to find my sexual release" as being devoid of sexual attraction.

[luckyalways]

Originally Posted by Brandye

Clare,

You are not alone and, believe me, the opportunity is there. With about one in every three married women giving it a try, you do have opportunity.

In my very small town, I am aware of at least three long term married women who have "tea dates" regularly. With my bi-sexuality generally know, I do get some requests.

Hi Brandye,

I started bi curious and now am in a FFM threesome with my husband and a very sexy, wonderful female friend and lover. My husband had no problems with me and my female lover. He is very supportive and encouraged my relations with my lover. After a about a 2 or 3 month relationship with her I was the one that wanted to have the threesome. We get together about one time a month and have nude weekends together. We sleep together and have all our sex together in bed together. Yes, the opportunity is there for anybody who is willing to explore their fantasies. Our threesome has been going on for almost 23 months and I still see my lover when ever we can get together.

[EvilEvilKitten]

I have a question, if I may.

I am NOT bisexual. This is usually held against me in the swing world where most of the couples have a bisexual wife. Ah well. My question is - when you ladies are off on your 'tea-dates', do you permit your husbands to go off on dates of his own with a straight female FWB? If yes, why and if no, why not?

[maupassant]

I am sure you are right Brandye; I think there may be a similar phenomenon reported re 'boy on boy activity in male boarding schools'. I think you are right about the long term friendships between girls. I am straight but think that the few male homosexuals I know are very very kind people. Maybe many of us straight men are just out-and-out bounders???? (that should get the Forum going this New Year's Day!!!!)(Happy New Year to all by the way)

Originally Posted by Brandye

You may or may not be correct. We have had several bi-curious, teenaged women. Some went one way, some the other, some tried both and some just did not come back. I am likely the most outspokenly bi-active woman on the Board. I am also older than your mother, most likely, and never married.

On to your question: Many women live with bi-sexual curiousity for much of their lives. This is, of course, discouraged to the point of repression in most cases. There are old sociological studies reporting a very high incidence of girl on girl activity in women's boarding schools. More recently, there has been work done among married women reporting almost a third have had at least one encounter with another woman. When a marriage gets stale, what is safer than a girlfriend? Can't get pregnant, usually long time friends, going on trips or frequent evening activities never raise a question.

To the extent you are correct, it could well be long term bi-curiousity finally coming out - after the kids are out of the way and a discovery that we have not been turned on, really turned on, for years.

[Brandye]

Evil,

That is an important question and I do not know the answer. Never having been married, I have not faced that issue. During the two long "straight" periods of my life, I was living with a man and did not stray. I, too, would like to see the input from married women who have a g/f with respect to allowing their man some freedom. I do know whose husbands have g/f. An acquaintance of mine is married to a rather prominent German politician. The German press reports (tongue in cheek, a bit) that the only they have in common is that they both date female movie stars.

[maupassant]

Originally Posted by Brandye

Evil,

That is an important question and I do not know the answer. Never having been married, I have not faced that issue. During the two long "straight" periods of my life, I was living with a man and did not stray. I, too, would like to see the input from married women who have a g/f with respect to allowing their man some freedom. I do know whose husbands have g/f. An acquaintance of mine is married to a rather prominent German politician. The German press reports (tongue in cheek, a bit) that the only they have in common is that they both date female movie stars.

Mine is a very different situation having been monogamous and hence true. I admire the openness of most folks on here and the admission that sex is like a sponge and one has to squeeze as much out of it as one can. I have learned of people in a lesbian situation who happily give 'booty calls' and have a sex-life a bit like a box of chocolates (Tom Hanks ref!!). I struggle at times, but am pleased that a situation outside my marriage would do me so much good.
Meanwhile, follow your heart folks!!