Coming out...

[lil_girl_224]

k so this is kind of long if you dont mind...i posted a question before...and it was this..."k so me and some of my firends...ill change thier names...ill call them jess...Lisa...and two guyz and ill change thier names to...well call them josh and chad...k so jess and josh are dating...k so anyway...it was me and them 4 and we were at chads house...we were in his room and we came up with the idea to just start making out...(dont ask how it came up) and so chad and lisa start making out so me jess and josh are all like hey lets all three of us makeout...so like me and jess start making out! it was weird cuz shes my best friend but still it was pretty good and so josh is like kissing our necks and stuff then we just all switched and i ended up making out with ALL of them and ya even the girls...alot...like it was just like kissing a guy...but im afraid if people find out what we did it will make them think of me as a lez so ya...does it make me one?" and i have made out with girls a few times since...all my best friends...and this is what makes it hard for me...i realized that im bi-sexual...but since i already made out with my friends...theyll be SO weirded out and i dont think they would accept it, you see im a popular person at my school, and i love everypart of it, except the fact that I CANT COME OUT! im going crazy...im bi...nobody knows but me...shud i just keep it in, because chances are I'll end up making out with my friends again but im jost so confused...

[demonbuttercup]

I wouldn't worry about it.
I mean apparently they would accept it because its your popular best friends you are making out w/ right???
I mean they are kissing girls (you) too ? right?

Also, you are young. People experiment,etc.. through out HS and college. Don't label yourself just yet, just enjoy who you are, things will come together in the end.

Besides, I thought it was "cool" to be bi now adays. I mean I know there are people who really are, but then again there are girls who will just make out for the guys to tease them etc. You know the whole Girls Gone Wild trend.

[thetease13]

Originally Posted by [b

Quote[/b] (demonbuttercup @ Sep. 04 2005,09:10)]Besides, I thought it was "cool" to be bi now adays. I mean I know there are people who really are, but then again there are girls who will just make out for the guys to tease them etc. You know the whole Girls Gone Wild trend.

I agree with you there.
I know many a person who will clame their bi just because it's the "cool" thing to be right now and because it could help them get a guy if they brought a girl along. *rolls eyes*

I don't have a problem with people who are gay or bi. I have issues with those who say they are because it's "cool" or just completely confuse what it really means (like some classify themselves as bi because they find someone of the same sex attractive).

Anyways, I wouldn't "come out" unless you were just absolutely sure that you were.
I see your thing as more of an experiment at a party. Everyone else was doing it so why not join in on the fun?
If you felt something out of it besides just enjoying a kiss then you might have something there. But otherwise, I'd wait a while and see if anything develops before you classify yourself as something you might not be.

[oberon]

You are what you are... but in high school there is enough uncertainty that I don't believe you need to be making any grand announcements.

The whole point of "coming out' is to make life better for yourself. So, you have to ask youself, will it? If you are so certain that you are bisexual and that keeping it to yourself is going to make your life miserable, then, by all means, come out. Otherwise, just enjoy exploring new experiences and figuring out what's right for you... which is what the teen years are supposed to be about.

Take care.

[Brandye]

Any of us who have been sexually active for quite a while can, and do, look back at a few things we wish we had not done and at others we worried about but were not really that significant.

At worst this will bring some short term embarassment; not likely. At best you have learned some things about yourself that will come into focus perhaps years from now.

Demon, Buttercup and Oberon have given good advice. Chill and see what life serves you.

[James2007]

I know josh and chad.. we may have met?

[madeye]

I had a conversation with my gf about women kissing women. (she is Bi)

She was trying to tell me that when she kisses a women its not sexual.

I disagree i do believe any time you passionately kiss someone it is sexual!

Its an intimate act that leads to sex with the people you are dating/in love with. Dont confuse that statement as me implying everytime you make out with a person you screw.... what iam saying is that everytime you screw it does start with making out.....

so i believe your brain interprets making out as a sexual act whether or not you actually do or dont want to have sex.

And yet

Something can be sexual and not be meaningful.

your brain comprehends french kissing as a sexual act, so in one way you are having a homosexual moment..... but the question is? was it meaningful.

does kissing her have any kind of next day affect on you.... do you want to kiss her again do you want to take her on a date.... do you feel like you could be falling in love with her.

Those are the question I think you need to ask yourself.

really i think the gender issue is trivial, cause you were kissing guys too, was kissing the guys meaningful. cause if you kiss a guy but have no further interest in him than that kiss then the sexual vibe of the kiss means nothing on the account of it having no meaning that affects your future.

and also a part of growing up is learning to not care what people think about you.... its hard top do and really to an extent you never grow out of it, but in this case if a bunch of rumors start spreading you gotta play it cool just shrug your shoulders and say "whatever" life goes on. People are going to freely judge others its up to you on how much you allow morons to affect your life.