Ever wanted to ask a gay person a question..

[HngLkAMouse]

I have no problem(s) re-posting it. Please keep in mind; similar to this very minute, it was composed first thing in the a.m. and my thought process was not as clear as I would have liked. After re-reading it... I also find it hard to follow, and I'm the one that wrote it.



But regardless, here it is:

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Well... in addition to my previous (humorous?) post... let me share MY beliefs on the subject.

*NOTE: Please ignore the inaccuracy of my facts. I am generalizing and estimating because I'm too tired to go find the actual data and/or facts.

Did you realize that aside from our perception as we get older... there is not a lot of difference between men & women...? Hmmm... that sounds like a far stretch, so let me explain:

It is not until LATE in the pregnancy that gender is determined and it is mostly determined by which hormone gets produced by the fetus first - testosterone or estrogen. At that point the body kicks-in.

Similar...? Yep. If you scour the web you will see some INCREDIBLE instances of the 'in-between" phases of sexual development; such as women's clitoris' that are larger than normal - resembling a small penis. Why... because it is the same flesh mass, just underdeveloped. The labia...? is the scrotum without testicles... the ovaries are the testicles but up in the abdominal cavity or you could take the opposite perspective that it's the Clitoris that GROWS for a man, the ovaries "drop" to become testicles into the scrotum which would have been the labia... etc. We both have nipples, etc.

My point is... it's the body's CHEMISTRY that determines what direction you will take sexually... but it does NOT always happen cut & dry or Black & White. Those are NOT the only hormones and feremones we have. There is belief that you may be genetically closer to the chemical makeup of a WOMAN being more in-touch with feeling and being more emotional yet having the physical characteristics of a MAN.

What about Hermaphrodites that are born with BOTH working reproductive sets...? What does that make them...? Straight? Gay? How do you tell...? If they're with a woman... are they straight or lesbian? If they are with a man, are they straight or Gay...?

From what I understand... more than 90% of non-heterosexual tendancies are NOT "choices" but desires that are not chosen... heck, dare I say REPRESSED for years and burried with denial.

We are slaves to the hormone(s) and our own brains. We like what we like... we hate what we hate. The similarities between men & women physically are closer than you think. The switch that 'normally' gets flipped that triigers interest of the opposite sex can sometimes be flipped a different way... or at times, not even be defined.

I take issue with those that say "You're either straight or gay... there is no Bisexuality" ummm... that's an odd statement. They think Bisexuals are "Confused". Sorry, but I've known a few of them and they didn't seem confused to me. They we very comfortable and grounded in their lives.

Anyhow... enough of my semi-long rant. I think there's a LOT more in my head that makes my point(s) clearer, but I just don't have the energy to type it all out. All I can say is, imagine this:

You wake up one morning... let's say tomorrow. You FEEL the same way you do right now. EXACTLY the same. But, something's different. WHOA! You look down and your gender has changed...!!! You are the OPPOSITE of what you thought you were. No, wait... that's not true... You've ALWAYS been this, but what your THOUGHT you were was a dream...? So, in my scenario, you are now the opposite sex but have all the want's & desires you have right now.

So.. guys... tell me... you now look down and see breasts and a vagina. Are you going to become "gay" and start dating other women...? Why? What's wrong with you...? (stereotypical response)

Girls... now that you lost your breasts and vagina and have a penis... will that make you desire women now...? or will you still like men...? Heck, that's gonna make you GAY now...!

My point is... all of us "straight" people seem to feel confident where we are because we're in the "norm"... but if all of a sudden, you were in a situation where your DESIRES have not changed... but your GENDER has... you still feel like the same person... but now the world's VIEW of you would change if you still were attracted to the sex you always were attracted to. Men who 'became' women would be considered gay because they still like women. Women who became men would be 'gay' because they still like men.

We cannot fault others because of a predetermined desire in their head(s). It's not fair. Imagine a guy saying: "Man, that woman is HOT looking.." and other guys being REPULSED by that statement. "Dude, are you sick...?" No! We like what we like.

Okay, enough of my rant... I hope at least 50% of this came across the way I intended to. Have good weekend...!!!


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Yeah... a little bit tough to follow, but I think (hope?) my intentions came across. Peace, all.

[Rawbob]

Thanks Hung....it certainly should give some folks food for thought. But then, that would require those who NEED to see the world as black and white, right and wrong, just can't see gray......ah well...their loss!

Hopefully we'll get more folks posting questions. I mean, with "Querr Eye for the Straight Guy," "Will and Grace" and assorted otehr shows that do give a glimpse into the gay world, there have to be more questions out there! They don't have to be personally directed towards me, generic questions are fine too! C'mon folks...POST!

[oberon]

Great post, HngLkAMouse. *And it deals with something that I've thought and wondered about.

It's interesting that you should bring up hermaphrodites because I have noticed an interesting reaction to that subject in myself. Okay, porn videos. *Chicks with dicks- attractive women with penises. *They don't do a thing for me. *I'm not sexually aroused at all. However, I came across a video of the opposite type. *A hermaphrodite male. *An attractive man with a vagina. *He was very masculine- beard, moustache, hairy chest and legs- just no penis. *I found him extremely attractive. *The lack of penis not withstanding, I don't think I would have a problem having a sexual relationship with someone like him. *Isn't that interesting? *It's not necessarily the penis that attracts us- or me anyway.

Maybe no one else will see any significance to this, or care. *I see some significance, I'm just not sure what. *Any opinions?

[HngLkAMouse]

Let's be clear about our terminology. To the best of MY understanding, a true Hermaphrodite NATURALLY has both a penis AND a vagina... in most cases, both are fully functional.

Transvestites or people who are transgender are not what I'm referring to. They may be Men whom have decided to live life as a woman in physical appearance and mannerisms, but they are genetically a man (having a penis & scrotum) or the opposite... women who dress & live the life of a man. Either of those types of individuals may or may not be taking hormones to help offset the "undesirable" traits of their intrinsic sex attributes.

The example I gave using a hermaphrodite was on the assumption of a 'true' Hermaphrodite... born that way. Oddly enough, the only pictures & footage I've seen are those that take-on the outward appearance of a Woman... quite possibly due to the primarilly female look of the body (Breasts, wide hips, no adams-apple, etc) They may very well be mostly "women" mentally, but having both sex organs. I don't know enough to speak with certainty.

If I think of any questions for either of you... I'll let you know. Thanks for sharing this part of your life for discussion.

[oberon]

I really didn't mean for that post to be offensive. If I'm not mistaken they described him on the box as a hermaphrodite, and claimed he was born that way. *It's been quite a while, but if I remember correctly, he did have an unusually large "clitoris" which as you pointed out would be the penis.

Anyway, I was more interested in the idea of attraction verses sexual organs. *Sorry if the language was a little hazy.

[HngLkAMouse]

Boy... a lot gets lost in translation...



I was not offended, nor was I trying to imply that you were wrong. I guess I really need to work on my communication skills a little more. It was more of an FYI than a correction... if it came across differently, I am sorry.

Seems to be a common thing with my posts... misunderstanding.

Heheheh...

[oberon]

I didn't think you were TOO upset. I just wanted it clear that I wasn't trying to offend anyone- straight, gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender, transvestite, hermaphrodite, (have I left anyone out!?!).

I suppose he could have been pre/post-operative transgender, but the no breasts, no penis would be pretty hard to fake.

[Rawbob]

Just to re-focus...ahahaha....if there are any members who want to post questions to me about homosexuality, living, loving, etc.....please feel free!

This is a great forum for information and idea exchange! Don't be shy!

[oberon]

(sheepishly) Sorry Rawbob, I got a little carried away. I should have opened another topic if I wanted to discuss it that badly.

Back to your program....

[echo1]

I have always been hetro. I also have a fantasy that involves another man. I don't know if I should just keep it to myself or try and make it a reality. I've never been with another man before but this fantasy always makes me want to try..... What should I do?