:p So I'm very open with my boyfriend, about fantasies and everything, or things I'd like to do to him, or vice versa. He's the same.
But then I got to thinking, since we havent done a lot of these things we say... should I be saying them? Personally I like saying them because its a turn on. But then when we do have sex is there going to be higher expectations created by what was said?
I'm a novice at things, and so is he so... am I setting us up for stress?
I was reading the other post about a guy not being able to perform because of stress, I dont want to do that to him. I know the first time is going to be weird... but I love him so it will be great at the same time. But I'm afraid I'm putting stress on him when really I dont mean to by saying things I would love to do.
I guess..as long as you're just saying what you'd like to try, then I don't see a problem,,unless you actually don't expect on trying it (or are trying to make it seem like you're an expert). I think it's good to be excited when going into it, but let the passion carry you towards anything sexual ya'll wanna do, let there be a natural progression towards it, rather than coldly pulling down his pants and expecting to automatically jump into things (pun INTENDED!), cause that could be a little stressful.
lol Thanks. No not to worry I wasnt planning on automatically jumping into things, I'm not trying to make it seem like I'm an expert, and I do plan on trying everything I've told him.
Then there's nothing wrong with telling him. My guy and I started dating before we even met in person (met online thru a mutual friend) and even before we started dating, we'd tell each other what we wanted to do to the other...now when we first met none of it happened and it took a while to get to that point, but eventually we did everything we said we would...I don't think it causes expectations, not unless like the1sttrisexual said, you make yourselve out to be better then you are.
I think that's when you come into your problems. But if you're not doing that and you're just telling him what you want to do, then no you didn't do anything wrong. Heck, guys love to hear our fantasies! lol
Sex shouldnt be stressful. If he's telling you his fantasies and what he wants to do to you in return then I dont think you should worry. If it turns you on im pretty sure its turning him on as well.
Who knows..maybe you wont even do everything youve talked about with him during the first time. There are going to be more opportunities to fulfill those fantasies. :D
i normally tell my guy what im thinking, if its kinky, so be it. he gets turned on, i get turned on, and we have ideas for later. nothings wrong with telling him.
just know that like lass was sying happened to her, it will probably take a while to get to that point. dont push it, dont feel like you have to do everything you said you would right away. and make sure he understands that too