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Helping her get there

Firstly, I am 17 years of age, and my girlfriend is 18.

My girlfriend has had sex before, she said that it was akward for her because her past boyfriends made their relationship all about sex and not being happy. She also said that she has a difficult time having an orgasm, unless the clitoris is directly stimulated. Her past boyfriends have attempted to stimulate her g-spot, with no luck.

I personally am a virgin, and sex is a really big step for me. It's not like I'm going to have sex with her tomorrow, because that's not why I'm with her.

So, the reason I'm posting, is that I would like any tips for helping her have an orgasm. I have read a lot about the clitoris and g-spot. I just want to make sure that I have the best chances possible to make her happy when the time comes.

Btw, your site is increadible. We have tryed all the kisses and some other things that you guys have on your site.

I thank you for any information provided. And thank you in advanced!

> Firstly, I am 17 years of age, and my girlfriend is 18.

Hi, and thank you for your post. It is always nice to get questions from a young person who genuinely wants to learn more in order to be better.

> My girlfriend has had sex before, she said that it was akward for her because her past boyfriends made their relationship all about sex and not being happy.

Now, having said that, I also wish I could work with those oafs your girlfriend dated previously so that future girlfriends would not have the same complaints. Of course these sex sessions were all about sex, they were just using her to get their proverbial rocks off and nothing more--or, if they were really trying, they sorely went about it blindly.

> She also said that she has a difficult time having an orgasm, unless the clitoris is directly stimulated. Her past boyfriends have attempted to stimulate her g-spot, with no luck.**

> I personally am a virgin, and sex is a really big step for me. It's not like I'm going to have sex with her tomorrow, because that's not why I'm with her.

Step One-
Please look at the Index found at the top of the main screen and read all of the articles. These articles are informative and several present how-to information.

Please do not let your lack of experience bother or worry you.
HELP! S/He is more EXPERIENCED! To which I say:

> So, the reason I'm posting, is that I would like any tips for helping her have an orgasm. I have read a lot about the clitoris and g-spot. I just want to make sure that I have the best chances possible to make her happy when the time comes.

Step Two-

Begin by addressing her emotionally. Satisfying a woman's emotional needs will go a long way toward satisfying her romantically, and then sexually. (1..2..3) This mean anytime, all the time; and, especially when you get an idea to get it on, later in the day.

> Btw, your site is increadible. We have tryed all the kisses and some other things that you guys have on your site.

Thank you for the positive feedback. One of purposes of this site is to make it easier for those coming up through the ranks than it was for us.

> I thank you for any information provided. And thank you in advanced!

** In her favor is the fact that she has learned to masturbate and can enjoy orgasms. This is important because a lot of people believe that they are given--not so. All any of us can hope for is that we help our partner achieve them.

INTERCOURSE / ORGASMS / and the gentle art of Humping(plus the G-spot and Making Out)

Step Three-

When it does come time to fool around and make out, and you have previously addressed her emotional needs, take your time. Do not be in a rush to achieve those orgasms. Devote no less than half an hour (and more time permitting) to kissing and caressing. Use this time to adequately arouse each other. Guys can be ready for sex and an orgasm at the mere thought; women on the other hand require much preparation. This begins by satisfying them emotionally long before doing so physically. When it comes time for the physical, do so in progressive stages: "Necking", "Petting", and, "Heavy Petting", before moving on to "Foreplay" and eventually "Intercourse!"

Please read Chapter Three in the series.

Step Four-

For Men and Women Only- Breasts and Play

Please read "The Program" and "Body Worship" by EvilEvilKitten (EEK).

Too Sensitive: Suggestions for touching and pleasuring the Clitoris

Please do not make the G-spot an immediate goal. You will find a couple of articles that discuss this very important aspect of love making; however, I believe it is much more important early on to develop other skills.

I hope this is of help. Whether the two of you read the articles in the Index, separately or together, please discuss the information and then begin incorporating the information into what you are doing.

Got questions?

Thank you for all the information. I'll be sure to repost on this thread if I have any questions.

And just to throw this out, she has told me that I make her wet. I kiss her tummy and her neck, and bite lightly, and sometimes use ice on her tummy as well.

Again, thank you. I'll repost by the end of today hopefully, but I will definantly read into all those articles. You guys are awsome!!!

I like the way you ask the question. Unlike the typical teen male who wants to "give" her an orgasm, you want to help. Doc gives very sound advice.

Now, the issue: it is with her and baggage from past relationships. The typical male is not too adept in manipulating our hot spots. This improves with age, experience and women giving good guidance. She fell into the hands of those who knew what she wanted better than she. Or so they thought. Most women on this Board have had such partners over the years.

She needs to turn that behind her and have different expectations including that she can pull up her pants and go home at any point. The emotional support that Doc alludes to is your most important contribution. And when you get around to her body, you can tell her directly "I do not have experience; please guide me to what is best for you." I so wish some of my past partners had said some such. I would have had more fun and they would be better lovers today - wherever they are.

Most younger women begin having sex with men with skill levels much like their own - little to none. So it should be no surprise that women do not realise that they have choices. Ladies, you can say NO at any time. You can also say 'a little to the left' as the case may be.

Fear of being emotionally hurt or emotionally entangled tends to make younger men less open and therefore less satisfying to women. The women end up feeling 'used' because of this. They then take that 'baggage' into their future relationships.

Ladies and gentlemen: HOW you play does have a profound effect. Men should be more open to satisfying the emotional context. Women should be more open about speaking what they desire/need - 'a little to the left'. Meet in the middle.

well as a note from someone who was in a similar situation that has now turned into a year and a half relationshio, with a ring on her finger and a baby on the way. When i met my fiance, I was not a virgin but i may as well have been, lost it at 17, got my heart broke by that girl and never had it again till last year and I was 24.

But we were together for 6 months before we were ready to actually try anything, from the very start I told her that I didnt know what i was doing very well and that most of what i did know i had read and heard on the internet, and that if at any point it didnt feel right to let me know. That let her know up front that it may be a little bad at first, even though it wasnt.

That night I just remembered all the things I had talked to her about and heard about and by the time I even touched any of her sacred parts she was already as wet as could be and panting for me. Just the simple things like knowing where else to kiss, and where else to slightly touch just to build up her anticipation and her emotional response.

And she has even told me that what made it even more special for her, was the fact that that night we never actually had sex, it was pretty much just fingering her to a g-spot orgasm and thats it, I was content knowing that she got hers. When i went to sleep that night I was as hard as a rock and had been for 45 minutes solid, but i got my reward later, 3 hours later at 2 am she was still so wet and so horny form the attention that i had given her, that i was woke up by the feeling of her nibbling on my ear lobes (sends me into orbit.) but what I had given her was more than just sex, it was love making session that left her wanting more and better, and there came the reward for me being so unselfish.

So just remember, it's nice to just have sex every now and then. But sometimes what your girlfriend needs more than anything is for you to make love to her, the taking your time to build up the anticipation and create the emotional response so much of her orgasm is mental rather than just physical stimulation.

Hope this long story in some what helps you.
Superdave

i lov my girl but i just want her to be very happy when the times come wat should i do

Welcome to the SI101 Board and its Forums. I hope you enjoy participating. Please begin by familiarizing yourself with the FAQs, the Posting Guidelines section, and especially the Index, all found at the top of the main screen. The Index contains links to helpful informative insightful, as well as how-to articles. The site's Home page has additional information.

> when the times come wat should i do

READ THIS THREAD, YOUR QUESTION IS WHY IT WAS CREATED. THE ANSWER IS ABOVE.

Please read thru the articles listed in the Index, you will find several on the art of making out, foreplay, intercourse, and a host of support information on all this. Begin reading and memorizing. Your question is one of the main reasons this site exists. The answer to your question is lengthy because there is much to learn, and this is why the articles have been written.

After reading, please do not hesitate to ask questions if you have any or ask for clarification. I hope this is of help.

[QUOTE=fabolous9;240001]i lov my girl but i just want her to be very happy when the times come wat should i do[/QUOTE]

Talk to your girlfriend before and after the sex. Try to show her how much you care about her and it will make your soulmate even happier than hundreds of orgasms.

Biggest advice I can give you:

1) relax

2)reading is fundamental

3) relax

4) reading is fundamental

and for the gspot part.....this is the best video i could find, study it

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hwJElbadlK0&feature=player_embedded

For oral sex guidance this was a good youtube tutorial: [url=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TW3lbOsTSh4]YouTube - Learn how to make a woman orgasm TODAY!

have meaningful discussion with her, not neccessarily based on sex, then gradually change the subject to sex...comment on her boobs, backside, her eyes, and lips...tell her how u feel staring at them...

then proceed to kissing her in the neck and ears...this will turn her on

then both of u could also have a drink...

> then both of u could also have a drink...

Yes, you could, although, this is not a mature response to having sex for the first time or two or anytime thereafter.

Yes, a few drinks will lower inhibitions; however, if you think you need a drink in order to have sex, then you are not yet emotionally ready.**

What is the most common reason given by people who are drug addicts? Answer: They take drugs because they do not want to feel anything real or have to deal with real life problems. Drinking before sex is no different in my never to be so humble opinion. If you believe you need to drink, first, in order to lower inhibitions, bolster courage, dull the pain, or whatever your "logic", think again.

** Anticipation, sexual excitement, anticipation, building arousal are all real events that lead to a pleasurable outcome, why dull the experience? If you are a teen or a person in his/her early twenties, drinking can lead to loss of control and awareness when you do not stop with just one or two as is so often the case. If you are a girl and accept one or more drinks from a guy, or as part of the group, think, again. Most young people do not know when to stop and then become wasted only to "wake up" and find that something happened that they would not want to have happen had they been in full control.

If you think a drink will relax you, yes, it probably will, yet, when you consider the number of people in the world having sex for the first time along with you this night, very very few will be drinking. If you think you need a drink, think again. Wait until you are able to prepare for this momentous occasion by mentally preparing for all that will happen, good and maybe not so.... If you are going to participate in what is clearly adult behavior, you have to be adult about the preparation, possible consequences, and, hopefully the enjoyment that results.

I am now an enlightened man, thanks for the wisdom! Foreplay and open mindedness for the win!