Hi everyone! I am a new member to this message board! I just have a few quick questions for anyone who would be willing to help me out, that would be awesome! I am 16 yrs. old and I am dating a 18 yr old, he is like my best friend we are extremely close and have been for a long time, we recently started dating! I have one problems tho, he always lavishes me with praise of how beautiful I am and stuff....but I am not very self-confident! (*I dont know y this is tho, everyone tells me how pretty I am, I actually used to be a model, i'm about 5'10", long blonde hair, blue eyes and I'm like a size 4. *) The problem is I wanna fool around with him more and whutever, but I think he is getting fustrated b/c hes kind of doing everything and I dont seem to into it, but I am too shy to make any big initiative towards him. I'm always scared I'm going to screw up, or drive him away somehow! This is the problem I had with my last b/f and actually y we broke up! 
I know times will cure my shyness but I was wondering if anyone had any suggestions for something I could do to him that wouldn't be a big step, but could make me seem a little more into it or any other suggestions would be greatly appreciated! Sorry, I dont mean to sound stupid with my minor problem, hahaha, but....I'd just like to get over it ASAP or take some steps in the right direction! Thanks so much~*! Have a great day everyone!!!!! 
Mon, 05/31/2004 - 20:21
#1
Help would be greatly appreciated~*! ;)
Thanks!
If you want to show him you're into it, jump on top! That would sure as hell let me know my girlfriend was into it.
But don't do any of this becuase you think he FEELS bad about. Do it because you WANT to.
Thanks so much for all ur help & input! Thats super~! Keep it coming if anyone has anything else they'd like too add! Anything is good advice and worth considering to me! Thanks again, have a good one.
Hi Trouble!
I have to basically agree with MizMinx555. The first question you need to ask yourself is, "How much do I want to do?". You might even set up some ground rules with him. Once you decide that for yourself, then allow yourself to at least respond to what he does. In other words, if he kisses you, then kiss him back...
Stuff like that.
The most important thing is to relax and do things as you are ready for them. The other most important thing (lol) is always use protection- condom with a spermicidal gel.
Take care.
I always "worry" a little when I read a post from a "shy and inexperienced" girl dating an older guy. Maybe my father gene kicks in or something, but I usually feel compelled to scream, "Remember that your relationship is not only about pleasing him."
If you lose him over not being "open with your body" then he wasn't worth keeping. It is not necessary to have sex with a guy who really cares about you to keep him. And if/when you do have sex with him, you don't have to know all the ins and outs (great pun, eh?). Even experienced people have to learn each other's bodies and responses for the sex to be the kind when fireworks go off. The love makes the sex good and working together makes it great.
That said, you can touch his arm... take his hand... simple gestures of affection.
You can also explain your problem to him. There is, you know, only one way to gain experience. But remember, experience alone does not give self-confidence.
Hunny... I hate to tell you this but most times you just gotta ride it out. Id tell you not to worry about it and that you sound beautiful, but from what you said, you know your a knockout. Sometimes I think that being shy around guys, even guys you've been dating for awhile, basically comes down to trust issues. Outwardly everything may be great, you may even love him, but sometimes subcontiously your just not ready to let go and give everything you've got (so to speak). That doesnt mean hes bad, or the relationships bad, it could just be a sign that your not ready. Thats just my opinion, and as always could be comepletely and utterly off base, but there it is for you to take or leave as you see fit. ;)
Hello again! Sorry I just read my post and there r somethings that I wasn't too clear on! I have been dating this guy for 3 months....but we have been pretty well best friends for like 2 yrs.! And as I said before, I know time should cure my shyness, but I really care for this guy and dont want to possibly lose him over me not being too open with my body and everything! Pretty much whut I am looking for r some small gestures or actions that I could do (*and feel comfortable doing*) to make myself seem a little more into it, for his sake and mine too! Hopefully it'll be a win-win situations!
Anyways, sorry if there was any confusion before, hope I cleared it all up! Thanks again for any help! Take Care! ->Trouble<-