Sorry if I take some of your time but I appreciate your reading and helping.
My wife and I have been married for 2 years, we are happy but the sex issue is always a problem, you see she dose not like having a lot of sex so we have it once a week ( and it is killing me ), when I ask her whey can't we do it more she seas that if I don't do it much I will want it more, but if you want you can do what you want with my body ( but I like her sole to be there as well ).
I know that I satisfy her in bed, ill tell you how I know, first of all I am a pre matcher ejaculator as soon as my pines touches her clitoris a cum at once, so I perform oral sex on her until she has an orgasm ( she doesn't like me inserting my finger in her vigina it makes her uncomfortable ), then I ejaculate by masturbation or by rubbing my body against hers. After that we have intercourse for one and a half hours strait ( my pines stays erect for more than 2 hours normally ). some times she has one or 2 orgasms ( so that is three with the oral ). And I only stop when she seas that she is sore. But I still haven’t got enough. So we kiss and cuddle and most of the times she gets very tired so she sleeps in my arms. So I masturbate a lot.
What shod I do to make her want me more
Unfortunately in order to get some women to play fair, a man has to get harsh to make his point clear. Please note, that there is no violence involved. All he has to do is exercize some self-control and to stop pandering to her by quietly excluding her from his inner life for a while.
You really can't make someone want to have sex.
And I"m pretty sure it's proven that woman on average have a lower sex drive than men, so you may just have to wait and jerk off.
"she seas that if I don't do it much I will want it more"
Sexual frustration is a way of getting and holding power in a relationship - this isn't about sex - it is all about dominace.
"but if you want you can do what you want with my body"
Yeah, throw the dog a bone.
Okay - this is what you do. Start going out with your male friends. Hang out with them much much, more. STOP calling her 'pet names' like sweety, honey etc. No flowers. No 'little tokens of affection' such as opening doors for her or giving her your arm when out walking. Take your once a week sex but No cuddling, no oral on her, no NOTHING that is not focused upon YOUR orgasm.
Try this for 4 weeks. If she asks tell her that you are tired of being ignored and having your desires dismissed as unimportant like you didn't have any feelings. Either she works with you on this or it is time for professional counseling to find out why she's not playing fair with you. That or this marriage is so over.
wow EvilEvilKitten harsh! Once u have been with each other for awhile the sex isnt as good a lot of the time. I have no idea what u should do but I like Kittens response. I would like to know how things work out for u
Thank you guys for your replays, the problem ( I think ) is here studying and taking care of the baby. I help her a lot and don't complain I see the guys only on week ends. I like to be around my wife and son.
Hope folly I will take to her about this and if she continues doing what she is doing I may do quikes 2 or 3 times a day until I hate sex ( for a will ).
[QUOTE=EvilEvilKitten;158186]"she seas that if I don't do it much I will want it more"
Sexual frustration is a way of getting and holding power in a relationship - this isn't about sex - it is all about dominace.
"but if you want you can do what you want with my body"
Yeah, throw the dog a bone.
Okay - this is what you do. Start going out with your male friends. Hang out with them much much, more. STOP calling her 'pet names' like sweety, honey etc. No flowers. No 'little tokens of affection' such as opening doors for her or giving her your arm when out walking. Take your once a week sex but No cuddling, no oral on her, no NOTHING that is not focused upon YOUR orgasm.
Try this for 4 weeks. If she asks tell her that you are tired of being ignored and having your desires dismissed as unimportant like you didn't have any feelings. Either she works with you on this or it is time for professional counseling to find out why she's not playing fair with you. That or this marriage is so over.[/QUOTE]
That will probably push her away & want it even less.
She wont feel close & she'll feel rejected, therefore she wouldnt want it.
Which is entirely the point!!!!
look: "she seas that if I don't do it much I will want it more"
HE's being rejected now so, fair being fair, now it is HER turn!!!
"Eye for an eye leaves everyone blind"
I believe the real secret to a great sex life guys...is the art of seduction! Come on fellas we all know how to do this..some better than others! But our big mistake is we stop doing it once we get her in bed. Then we wonder why she denies us. Remember why she went to bed with you in the first place...remember that guy? you said all the right things...listened to her...touched her...she didnt and wouldnt deny him. Just because you've been married 2 years doenst mean she doesnt want to be seduced.
Look what you do is talk to her about it, and if she doesnt change dont let her cum until you cum. Make her cum and then you cum no more multiple orgasims, make the oragsms equal. Tease her more instead of having sex just tease her and then stop, make her want sex, show her what she is missing. Try new things as well, new positions toys things like that always help a relationship
People the issue here isn't seduction, foreplay etc. This lady has control issues. The issue is DOMINANCE which is something I would know about being a dominatrix.
It isn't eye for an eye;
its fighting fire with fire.
Ready for this.
First dude think less of your penis, to get more for it. If she knows your thinking of having sex and not thinking about the moments with her, she is less likely to want to all the time.
Second she must be one amazing girl to put up with you humping her for two consecutive hours once a week, it must be raw. Check this, atleast try it. It involves masterbating alot for a week but do it in the shower so it makes you look good try to hide it. Anyways when the time of the week comes around when you and her get down. Let it revolve around her. let her feel special. Not by how many orgasums she has in two hours. Try to do something sexually for her the next night without your penis this will suck but trust me, if she offers dont go more then 20 minutes or try to refuse. but this should make her get into a new pattern and less pain on her pussy. OH Bring things into the bedroom to make sex interesting like ice cream toppings its simply and semi clean. This should Fix your problem, it takes alot of self control and sex, will at first be less time. but she most likely will start this new pattern of her getting pleased every night for no reason. Tell me If this Helps you out or makes the Most sence and dont listen to kitten unless you want arguments and maybe a devorce.
Even though she may like it like that Your Wife to me sounds Diffrent. (No Worries Kitten Im Down)
P.S. ASK her what her sexual fantasy is do it no matter what. Act like you like it even if its crazy cause you love her and she deserves it.
Peace Peace
Good Luck We All Got Problems
Two hours? Jeez, you people just aren't trying! That barely gives you enough time to get your clothes off! Try being intimate in four hour blocks with intercourse several times interspersed with cuddling, pillow wrestling, etc inbetween bouts.
Two hours of purely penetrative sex can be brutal for anyone, male or female. Try to remember that sex is not just about penetration and intercourse. Sex is both animalistic and romantic. Ask yourself what you and your sexual partner are trying to accomplish when you make love. If you are simply trying to get her to orgasm as many times as possible in a two hour period, then you are both missing out on a significant part of sex.
I would first suggest seeing a sexual therapist about your premature ejaculation. There are multiple causes of PE, and in your case it is likely that it is caused both by physical and mental issues.
Secondly, try not making a routine out of sex. Though knowing that you'll be "gettin' some tonight" can be arousing for men and women alike, no one likes routine.
Finally, and most importantly, foreplay is crucial. Make your sexual experience much like you would make a cake. Set aside a block of time where you will have no interruptions, and devote yourself to her. Add ingredients slowly, and in proportion. Always remember to mix it up thoroughly. Build up to sex. Sex is not just the act of intercourse, or even oral/anal/manual play. I will agree with Ms. Kitten in her idea that cuddling, pillow fighting, etc. are all integral parts of the sexual experience for both of you (especially her). It's no secret that women find foreplay intensely more gratifying than men, so don't forget to satisfy her urge for build-up. It's not all about the orgasm.
He has said he gives her a lot of foreplay attention before they have sex, and I think that is the issue. I think they should try new things together so she gets more interested in sex, Steele is right though, don't make a routine out of it, it takes some of the excitement away, and try to shorten sex to instead of 2 hours make it an hour see if she just enjoys that better
I completely agree with EvilEvil on this one...
Women use sex as a method of control in many relationships. After all, a man can't just take it because that's rape. So she uses it as a reward or threatens to take it away if the man displeases her. Catering to her needs just affirms this strategy.
You can't just take sex from her. But stop asking/begging for it (and that's what it looks like, she's playing the gatekeeper here) and be more independant as EvilEvil suggested. Don't play her games.
BTW you can't MAKE someone want more sex. Either they have a sex drive or they don't. But he problem really isn't about sex but about power within their relationship. Men who become lap dogs are boring. Men who become teddybears are irresitable. So be all big and bad and grumpy with a sparkle in your eye.
[QUOTE=EvilEvilKitten;158315]Which is entirely the point!!!!
look: "she seas that if I don't do it much I will want it more"
HE's being rejected now so, fair being fair, now it is HER turn!!![/QUOTE]
Then she'll feel preasured into it, in which case it'll turn her off & she wont do it.
Sirene perhaps she should be pressured - remember it isn't about sex - it is about dominance.
If my 2cents count for anything I would have to side with kitten as well, whether you people think she's right or wrong. It's a whole power issue! Why should he continue throwing himself down at her feet, granting her every wish, killing his desires in the process.
Ok, you may cannot "make" someone want to have sex with you, but you can create sexual tension! If I were you, when ever the once a week rolls around, prolong any and every direct stimulation you know she loves. Instead attacking the nipples, go every possible place around it to where the tension will build. Same with her clit and all other of her "hot" places.
Through the week, builder her up (sexually, but not to point of cumming), then calm her down. Two steps forward one step back. You're the man, take control. Never be predictable!! And Please don't tell me that the once a week is on the same day every week?! If so, CHANGE IT! Never let her expect what you will do!
During the day call her and verbalize what you would love to go home and do to her. Men are more physical responsive, but women are more verbal responsive. You can help a woman climax from closely whispering in detail in ear, what you would love to do to her (it's possible). There's all sorts of ways you can handle this. But the worst thing you can do is find new ways to directly please her, or continue what you're doing now!
And one thing just came to mind, what does she do during the day? Where does she work?