i have just started dating a man i feel very strongly for, but i'm worried about his inability to become aroused by a vagina. he can 'get it up' for anal but it is unable for missionary or woman on top. he says this has always been the case and he doesn't know why. and just incase anyone thinks it, no he is not gay. he is very opened minded and wondered if that was why, but insists he has no interest in men. he loves giving oral and can really go to town (his words) and he can do doggy style. i just don't understand why he's never been able to be aroused for traditional positions. we have talked a little, but i also don't want to push it until i can find out some more info.
i don't mind anal, but gosh i miss missionary and face to face sex.
Thu, 01/11/2007 - 14:07
#1
he only likes anal
probably just feels better to him.....and actually arouses him and excites him to do what he likes.....And since he does like to give oral....consider yourself lucky....not all men are into that...lol
thanks, but i just want to know why he nas NEVER in his whole life been able to get arousal from face to face sex. he has tried. it just seems so unusual to me. and i don't understand why and i'm worried it might be a reason to it and affect us. i will talk to him further on the subject. i was just hoping i might hear from someone else who has the same difficulty.
he probably gets more pleasure from anal be the anal hole is tighter then the vagina. but if you are not very loose then it is just his preference. just talk to him about it and be open with him, tell him what you have asked us
I think the whole lack of "face to face" sex has to do w/ some sort of intimacy issues.
B/c you said he can do vaginal but only in the doggy position??
I am not a professional so I can't assume what the issues are, but there does seem to be something present.
Hi
Is he willing/able to participate in girl on top; feet over shoulders; standing supporting your weight on his thighs + against wall; on a kitchen counter/table/desk?
There are many ways to "skin a cat" and maybe "normal" missionary has some deep seated mental block.....maybe he walked in on his parents/others busy in this position!
Try any other position in which one gets to see the others face!
What about trying any of these with lights off, working slowly to a lights on face to face position.
Hmm, girl on top, feet over shoulders, wow!
No, seriously. Leaving actual sex out of it for the moment, does he enjoy kissing and cuddling? I mean, will he lie with you in bed and just kiss and cuddle, face to face? If he won't do that, then I'd say he has some issues to deal with. After all, when you think about it, face to face sex is really an extension of a good kiss and cuddle. (Well, that's one way to look at it.)
yeah, there's some issue there. he only likes oral if it's a 69 position so i'm facing away and he can view my arse. his words. he has a REAL arse prediliction. startin' to worry me a bit that he won't be able to get it up for anything else. we can cuddle and kiss and he's very open, but when i ask he just says that's the way he's always been. as for his preference for anal and not getting it up for missionary or woman on top, for it to be a preference you have to have been able to try it first. that worries me the most. it may be nothing i suppose, but i am a woman and we're born to worry. need to hear from more men.
Well, I like doing it from behind, 'doggy style'. I find that position a real turn on. But I don't go for anal. Why would I want to visit the waste disposal system when there is a nice friendly vagina right next door calling to me. (Well, that's just the way I look at it.)
But kissing and cuddling is great, I really like that.
Although my wife and I almost exlusively practice anal sex, it is the choice and preference of us both. I would have no problem if my wife decided she wanted to flip-flop things.
I may be grasping as straws, but I would imagine he is into hardcore pornography, most likely accompanied by masturbation. Either that or, as learning eluded to, maybe some sort of mental block.
Good luck, and let us know how it turns out.