Okay, so yes I'm a little young... I started at a young age, so please don't point fingers! Anyways, when we have sex *my boyfriend and I* I can make him have an orgasm like that! But when he tries to give me one, it just doesn't feel very good, and I don't have an orgasm... It just hurts some times... But... For some strange reason when he wears a rubber, it feels amazing, but he can't have an orgasm with it, he says it doesn't feel good, and me being a nice person I want him to have pleasure more than me have pleasure so I don't get him to wear a condom... How can we both have pleasure without the condom?
*** We've been dating for 2 years (approx), he's STI free and I'm on Birth Control ***
Please read this and then re-direct your question:
http://www.sexinfo101.com/forum/new_sex/19803-for_women_only-_help_why_c...
Never mind then...
In one of the references, above, is a link to the INDEX. The link is no longer valid as the information has been moved here:
You will find many articles of worth to the two of you.
There is information in these articles that will inform you about the anatomy of an orgasm, what it takes to learn how to have orgasms from masturbation, what is required to help each other orgasm from hand and/or oral stimulation.
The two of you are on a fools mission to have intercourse without each of you taking responsibility for contraception. This means he wears a condom. Much as has been written about this, several discussions within the past few days if you go through and look. Both of you need to be responsible by looking out for and protecting #1 and your respective futures. One bit of protection is insufficient, particularly when you are young and more apt to become pregnant for a variety of reasons.
There are measures your boyfriend can do to help him have orgasms with a condom.
* switch to plastic/poly varieties
* switch to natural (only if he remains faithful)
* add lubrication to the Glans only of the penis in order to provide some wiggle room that will help transmit friction
* roll a condom on and begin intercourse only when he is on the brink of an orgasm, yet can still maintain control
Please read the relevant articles listed in the Index, and, do some time looking through the various forums for past discussions.
Doc, the link I gave worked, I just re-checked it. If someone cannot take the time to read on topic, they are not going to read through the index. Hence, the reason I would not waste my time with a further response. She never said she could have an orgasm; therefore, I believe her reading the post would be beneficial. If someone cannot even begin there, the time of anyone on this board is a waste. It's not as if she replied "I did read but still have a question".
It becomes frustrating when something so important to them posts yet cannot take 5 minutes to read, rather they want an immediate answer handed out on a silver platter for either their approval or disapproval.
Like you, I used to want to have orgasms from sex, and wondered why it wasn't happening. For one thing, he can't "make you have an orgasm," you can have an orgasm with him. It has to come from you. For girls, orgasm is usually as much a state of mind as anything else (meaning be in a sexy, uninhibited state of mind), and you usually don't reach it without direct clitoral stimulation. At least 75% of women do not orgasm just from penetration - most need added clit stimulation in order to get off. So, get yourself off during sex, or have him help. This works best in doggy style. Also works with you on top, but a little more difficult in my experience. You may also want to try different positions. I have been able to orgasm from sex alone in doggy style, but not in any other positions (since this provides a better angle for G-spot contact). This is still pretty rare for me, and I have to be VERY comfortable for it to happen (i.e. know that no one can hear us, be really turned on and in a sexy frame of mind, etc.). If sex isn't feeling very good with him to begin with, you certainly won't orgasm. Maybe you aren't having enough foreplay? You also mentions that he cums quickly, which may be why you aren't enjoying it.
Another thought: I don't usually orgasm from sex. I do have a great time and it feels amazing, but it doesn't usually push me over the edge if there isn't clit stimulation involved. Because this is the case, my boyfriend usually goes down on me before we have sex, or I get myself off and he watches, or he fingers me. By the time I've already had an orgasm, I am positively drooling for more, and if I don't have an orgasm through sex it's not a big deal. Plus, a woman needs proper foreplay, and a lot of women aren't really warmed up enough until they've already orgasmed.
My previous advice assumes that you can orgasm via masturbation, oral, etc. If you don't masturbate or have never had an orgasm, then that's a whole different business. Do not expect someone else to be able to give you pleasure if you can't give yourself pleasure! You need to know what kind of touch you like and what gets you off, and you need to be open enough to communicate that to your boyfriend. If you can show him what you like, then he can incorporate that kind of touch into sex or foreplay.
Anyway, I wish you the best and I hope this was helpful.
Although this goes against what i believe...I think protection and being careful is important when doing anything sexual. but if you really wany to please him, but want an orgasm too, then make him wear one till you come, and then he can take it off...i agree with brandye's opinion one sex, that you should always use protection but if your boyfriends pleasure is the be all end all, and pregnancy doesnt matter then have sex with the condom, and take it off when you finish.
> you should always use protection but if your boyfriends pleasure is the be all end all, and pregnancy doesnt matter then have sex with the condom, and take it off when you finish.
This makes no sense at all. What am I missing, here?