My boyfriend and I have been having sex for a few months now, and I've come to realize that he can last for up to three and sometimes four hours in bed. Granted, that's what all girls dream of, a long, pleasurable sexual experience. ...Is there any way to make him cum faster or to at least speed up the process any? It's not that I don't love it, I just get really tired quickly, and I don't want to stop having sex with him by any means. Any thoughts or ideas...?
Tue, 01/05/2010 - 08:45
#1
He can go for hours... I can't.
Do you need to stop because you're physically and mentally tired or because you're sore? I'm assuming the first for the following, but if it's the latter, then he needs to improve upon his technique, use more lube, and do more foreplay.
First approach - You can focus on him first, and be relentless! Don't be shy and make sure he knows not to hold back and see how many times you can make him orgasm before he gives up. There are lots of articles here for how to do that. Then, when you're ready, hop on top and go until you're done, and I'm sure he won't get up to do more once you get off(pun not intended but appropriate!).
Second approach - More foreplay where he's close to finishing before even entering you, and afterward he doesn't try to hold back. Many guys will assume that they must always try to last as long as possible so inform him that this isn't necessary. Be sure to communicate what you want!
It is also very important for you to relax and breathe! Tensing up while holding you breath until a big climactic finish will accomplish just that, but if you learn to find a balance with relaxation and breathing during the act you will be able to enjoy many orgasms in a row like rolling with the waves.
I rarely have a refractory period and have yet to encounter a physical time limit to an erection if I don't want it to go down, but if she sets her mind to it she can definitely make the whole rest of my body surrender when it can't see, hear, or stop twitching.
Why settle for one when the two of you could have many?
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> Is there any way to make him cum faster or to at least speed up the process any?
YES! there is. Please go to the Index and read the article about how to make each other climax from a hand and/or oral stimulation.
Next, please read the several articles on how to make out in general.
Follow these by reading the articles by EvilEvilKitten (EEK), especially "The Program".
The first article is extremely important because many people fail to understand that just rubbing a penis as in this case, or a clitoris, is all that is required to make a person climax. Not so. The "why" and the how are discussed.
Reading the other articles gives both of you more information and understanding about arousal, excitement, and, sexual tension, in order to be better at what Fun recommends in his reply, above.
I hope this is of help. Got questions?
-doc
"... that's what all girls dream of." Not so. After about twenty minutes he would find himself dumped on the floor. First, have a nice long chat. Then determine what will bring him to the brink before penetration. And make sure you get yours before you are worn out. Splayed hips are comfortable for only so long no matter that we are designed for it.
You and he need to get in sync. Yeah he can go for hours but he's not thrilling you after a certain amount of time. So, TELL HIM when time's up and you want to rest up a bit. Gradually work on increasing the time you can go on for. No rush. This is not the Olympics.
The Program says aim for something on the order of 45 minutes of sex then 15 minutes of rest & hydration then repeat as necessary.
Another thing to consider isn't going to be pleasant but has to be said. If you're NOT talking to him, commnicating what you like/dislike/want/don't want then you're cheating. Men do not want a martyr for the cause, they want wild enthusiasm. Equally participate in the adventure of sex.
But let's suppose you do all of the above and yet, still he continues his marathons - and you're not into marathons - if this is the case, then he's selfish and you'll have to get rid of him. Please tell him why.
But let's hope it doesn't come to that.